Sidnaaz an emotion

Chapter 114

Sana went towards washroom area to change and Sid went behind her as he wanted to clear things between them asap .

Sana grabs her clothes and was going towards in the washroom but sid came and hold her hand she was going to jerked it but sid hold her hand firmly .

Sana- abhi mat kar mai bohot thak gai hoon aaj bohot lamba din tha aur mere sir main bhi dard hai .

Sid- pta hai jab subha se sahi se nahi khayegi aur shaam ki medicine bhi nahoi legi to kya hoga .

Sana was looking at him like he is a ghost.

Sid- pta hai kya soch rahi hai ki baat to kar nahi rahe the to mujhe kaise pta hai baat bhale hi nahi kar rahe the par meri nazar humesha tujh par hoti hai haa gusse mein thoda jyada ho jata hai par tu jaanti hai mai aisa hi hoon .

Sana- pta hai ...mai jau change karne .

Sid- ruk and gave her another top and trouser, ye loose hai chot par lagega nahi to hurt nahi hoga jyada .

Sana without a word went to change, in the mean time sid also changes his clothes when  sana came back sid was sitting on bathroom bed waiting for her .

Sana- was going towards bedroom area but sid holds her hand .

Sid- bahar chal .

Sana- nahi abhi nahi kal ddekhte hai .

Sid- puch nahi raha hoon bol raha hoon chal and take her hand and made her sit on dining table .

Then he went and bring a plate of food for her .

Sana was going to deny but Sid didn't gave her time to speak and when she opened her mouth to deny he shoved the morsel in her  mouth .

Sid- jaanta hoon mana karegi gussa hai par kitni baar bola hai ki mera gussa khane par mat nikal kar maine jab nahi bola kyuki uss waqt rashmi aur sab tere aas paas the aaya tha bolne par unhe dekha to bina bole chala gaya mauka nahi dena chahta tha mai unhe .

Sana- tune bhi nahi khaya hai kha le pta hai mujhe tera bhi waise ka waise rakha hai dinner .

Sid-pehel tu finish kar energy bhi chaiye na mjhse ladne ke liye .

Sana- dono karenge warna ek bhi nahi karega .

Sid and Sana ate their food silently then sid take their plate and wash it and came back to her .

Sid- chal bahar chalte hai .

Sana- raat ho gai hai bohot abhi kal karte hai baat .

Sid- abhi mauka hai sab so rahe hai aur waise bhi neend nahi aane wali hai dono ko hi .

Both went outside in the garden area and sit comfortably on green bed .

Sid- mujhe pta hai tu mujse gussa hai hona bhi chaiye jo kuch bhi iss hafte hua wo bohot jyada ho gaya ek alag level pe hua itni ladai nahi hui hai tu jaanti hai mujhe bohot ache se aur mera gussa bhi jaanti hai mai safai nahi de raha hoon na mai dunga kyuki jo hua uska justification nhai hai par mai itna bol raha hoon ki maine tujhe galat nahi samjha tha aarti wale matter mein haaa ek moment ke liye laga tha ki tu aisa kaise soch sakti hai ussi waqt dimaag kharab ho gaya tha aaya tha tere paas aur jab tune bol diya haa bola hai mai out of control ho gaya pati hoon tera kaise bardaasht kar sakta hoon ki meri wife mujh par yakeen na kare wo bhi uss matter mein jab wo mujhe ache se jaanti hai ki mai sirf usse pyaar karta hoon .

Sana- tune mujhse gusse mein aakar pucha mai already gussa thi tere se aur tune jaise bola wo aisa nahi lag raha tha ki tu puch raha hai aisa lag raha tha ki tujhe believe hai ki maine hi bola hai wo cheez ne mujhe tod dia ki tujhe jo baat mujhse clear karni hai wo sab ke saamne kyu akele bhi ho sakti thi par uss cheez ka tamasha bann gaya sab ko mauka mil gaya ek aur mujhe jo matlab bataya gaya mere hissab se maine maana ki aarti tere liye back up ki tarah kaam karti hjai mai apne khelti hoon bohot baar almost nahi sunti teri par wo humesha tere liye kahdi rahi hai tujhe support kia hai chahe wajah jo bhi ho par wo rahi hai tere paas to maine bola tha maine wo hi tujhe bhi bola ki haa bola hai tune mujhe bola ki ghtaiya soch tu  jaanta hai mai khud ke baare mein galat soch sakti hoon.

Tu mere liye kya hai tu jaanta hai mere dimaag mein aaya bhi nahi ki ki uska koi galat matlab ho sakta hai tujhe jaanti hoon mai ek dedh saal hone ko aaya hai humari shaadi ko itna jaanti hoon ki tu kabhi kisi aurat ke baare mein galat nahi soch sakta tune to rashmi ko bhi kabhi koi ulta jawab nahi dia jab usne tera career almost kharab kar dia tha to tu kyu kisi aur ladki ke baare mein sochega aisa mujhe pta bhi nahi the ki tere dimaag mein aisa kuch hai  .

Sid- gusse mein mera dimaag kaam karna band kar deta hai tu jaanti hai aur tujhe lekar mere alag hi emotions bahar aate hai mai kabhi vocal nahi raha hoon apne emotions ko leke par tere saath alag sid hota hoon mai bachha bhi ban jaata hoon tujhe pamper karta hoon gussa karta hoon pyaar karta hoon har emotion nikal kar aata hai par agar mujhe aisa laga bhi ki tu mujhe galat samjh rahi hai to mai bardaasht nahi kar sakta mai tujhse jitna pyaar karta hoon mai btaya bhi nahi sakta aur wo moment par mai sirf assure chahta tha ki tu jaanti hai mujhe par jab tune wo bola ki haa tu maanti hai to mera dimaag satak gaya kyuki mujhe pta tha ki rashmi kuch na kuch karegi mujhe laga wo tujhe manipulate kar rahi hai mere khilaaf isiliye wo sab bola tha par mai mean nahi karta tha mai tyujhe kabhi ghatiya nahi bol sakta wo situation itni ghatiya thi ki mai wo word tujhe bol gaya .

Mera dimaag pehle se hi kharab tha ki tu rashmi ke saath baith rahi hai aur jab wo sab mein tera aur rashmi ka naam aaya to mai pagal ho gaya tha gusse mein kyuki mai jaanta hoon wo meeti ban kar teri image bahar kharab karna chahti hai isiliye bola tha uske saath mat rehna par tu sunti nahi hai maine jhela hai wo sab tune bhi himanshi ki wajah se jhela hai wo sab aur toot gai thi tu , jaanti hai na kya kya hua tha kis hadd tak ki tu apne aap ko maarna chahti thi mai wo sab nahi jhel sakta tha mai khud ko kuch bhi ho jaaye dekh sakta hoon jhel lunga kyuki jaanta hoon tu hai mere saath par agar tere saath kuch bhi hua na to phaad ke rakh dunga sabko already 2 panic attack aa gaye hai tujhe bahar kuch aisa jaata aur tujhe pta lagta to tu nahi kar sakti thi handle isliye wo sab se mera dimaag kharab hua samakjh rahi hai mai kya bol raha hoon .

Sana- haa samjh aa raha hai mai nahi samjh pai uss waqt ki tu kyu itne gusse mein aaya aur jab tune ghatiya bola mujhe laga unn logo ne tujhe apni baaton mein le liya hai aur maine tujhe kho diya hai humari ladai pehle se hi chal rahi thi aur phir wo sab mai samjh nahi paai thi kuch bhi .

Sid- pta hai baby mai jaanta hoon tera dimaag ulta nahi chalta tu in logo ki chalaki nahi dekti hai kyuki tere liye wo sab naya hai par mai jaaanta hoon .

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