Unleashed in February (Behind The Month #1)

20

20, My young self

The following days in December weren't as cold as they were in the past year. Mainit ang panahon at tila naging madamot ngayon ang hangin sa pagbibigay ng malamig na simoy.

If I'm not checking the date on my phone and not hearing the news on our TV, I wouldn't know tomorrow's Christmas already. Malaking tulong din ang pagsimba namin tuwing gabi o madaling araw para maliwanagan ako kung anong petsa na ba.

Sinamahan ko si mama sa pagbili ng mga rekados at mga kakailanganin para sa mga iluluto sa Noche Buena. Si papa naman ay sumama rin pero naiwan lang sa sasakyan, nagsama pa ng isang tuta sa mga anak ni Siberian.

May tatlo pang naiwang tuta sa bahay pero alam kong maipapamigay naman silang lahat dahil ayos na ang tatlo naming aso sa bahay.

"What are you doing?" ani mama na natatawa pa nang kaunti dahil sa patuloy kong ginagawa.

I smiled tightly and shrugged. Lahat ng inilalagay niya sa cart ay chinecheck ko ang expiration date. It's a habit of mine just to make sure we're not eating a spoiled or expired food.

"Just checking..."

The day was too busy that I only had the chance to prepare myself and dress up nicely around six. Kumpleto kaming lahat sa pamilya para sa pagsalubog sa pasko. Although Kuya Oxenn and his wife were supposed to spend it with Ate Mirrae's family, we all know it could make our mother upset. Kinalakihan na namin ang tradisyon.

The birth of Christ Jesus is important to the family. Lalo na sa mga magulang namin.

Everyone's wearing a clothing with a touch of red and white. Isang pulang off shoulder dress ang suot ko. Nasa kusina kaming lahat habang inaayos na isa isa ang mga handa. Thankfully, tahimik si Stacy at hindi nagtatatakbo ngayon o naglilikot. She's amazed with the decorations we have at home. It's so obvious in her round eyes.

Panay ang tikim at kain ko at paminsan-minsan ay sinusubuan si Stacy. Ang wine at iilang alak sa hapag ay ang siyang pinaka-puntirya ko sa lahat. I'd just have some. Hindi ako maglalasing.

We took so many pictures before eating. Kuya Benj even set up a camera for us to have a good family picture, like how it goes each year. Nasa tabi ko si Ate Apple habang kumakain na kami. We all prayed first before starting.

Hindi natahimik ang cellphone ko kaya natitigil ako sa pagsali sa mga kwentuhan. We were guessing the gender of Kuya Oxenn and Ate Mirrae's baby. She's blooming so I had a hunch that it's a girl. But no matter what, I'd still love it. All babies are cute anyway.

Binuhay ko ang phone ko habang sinisipsip ang hintuturo na ginamit sa paghimay ng manok.

I used my clean hand to scroll on my phone. Napakaraming messages at notification. Binuksan ko ang pinakaunang mensahe.

Fr: Hope

Merry Christmas nyutiful

I snorted and typed my response.

To: Hope

Samee merry Christmas hope

I was online too so he started a video call but I ended it in an instant. Tumunog ang phone ko dahil doon kaya nagtaka sina kuya.

"Sino 'yon?" si Kuya Benj na abala pa rin sa kinakain.

I smiled simply. "Si Hope lang-"

"Papuntahin mo rito!"

"Oxenn..." ani mama sa preskong anyaya ni kuya.

I can't do that. We never spent Christmas or New year's Eve together, or him with my family or the other way around. I feel like that's another thing we shouldn't enter. Too many moves have been done already. I can't compromise these kind of events to prove something to my family more. No need for more extra sweet gestures. No need for those unwanted flutters in my chest. We're just going straight to the plan, that's just how it would be. I'll make Hope fully aware of that.