(Everyone is doing their own thing outside. It's a pretty nice day for Mabel to skip around)
Mabel: La la la la la!
(She accidentally bumps into Nerris, getting her braces caught in her braces. They both scream)
Nerris: Braces! They trapped us in some linking contraption! Someone help us!
Mabel: Someone dictate my will, I'm giving everything to Waddles!
Soos: (shows up with a screwdriver) Say "ah", girls.
(They do so and Soos pries their braces off from each other)
Nerris: Soos! You have saved us! We are internally grateful!
Soos: Heh heh! Just doing my job! Now to help Gwen out with something! See ya, kids!
Campers: Bye, Soos!
(Soos is helping Gwen organize the campers' files after Max rummaged through them)
Gwen: Those campers at times... They can all be little shits, Max especially. But hey. You gotta do what you can to pay for those student loans.
Soos: Yeah, but they can also be pretty cool and fun, dude. They can beat me in Mario Kart and I'm great at that!
(Soos eventually gets a call. He picks it up and it's from Aunt Valentina)
Soos: Hola, Tía Valentina.
Valentina: Hola, Soos. I'm just calling to say that your cousin Reggie is having an engagement party next month.
Soos: Wait, wait, Reggie is engaged? But he's like a poor man Soos.
Valentina: Reggie can get laid and you can't, Soos. Your abuelita wants you to bring a date to his engagement fiesta. She at least wants you to have a girlfriend before she dies and goes to heaven.
Soos: And sees Abuelo!
Valentina: .... No, Soos. Abuelo is not in heaven. (Hangs up)
Gwen: What was that all about?
Soos: I need to find a date before Reggie's engagement party. No problem. I'm great at fixing stuff, playing video games, having a sort-of mustache. I could totally get a date in a week.
Gwen: If I have to give you advice, do NOT go on Tinder. David has and still is doing that and it has given him nothing but misfortune. Actually, love is nothing but shit anyway. Just give up on it before it shatters you.
Soos: .... I'm dead.
LATER
(Stan takes all the campers and counselors outside for the People-Watching camp activity. Jess walks in.)
Stanley: Hey, kid!
Jess: (screams) Jesus Christ, you're gonna give me a heart attack someday!
Stanley: You need something to take your mind out of the fact that you'll all die someday? (Pulls out Goldie) Don't you want to use a nickel to get a nugget from old Goldie?
(They just stare, dumbfounded)
Stanley: Here! Watch this!
(Goldie's arm moves up and his hat rises. Both of his eyes fall out while grease and smoke come out and he starts to scream.)
Jess: That face reminds me of the inevitability of death. Thanks a lot, Mr. Pines.
Soos: (goes up to Jess) How do you use your mouth to say words and make romance happen?
Stanley: Um, Soos-
Jess: Depends. You want to use an ancient chant to make your soulmate bound to you for life? Or do you wanna do this normally?
YOU ARE READING
Gravity Falls In This Camp
Hayran Kurgu(WARNING: This story will not be for the faint of heart. Cussing and mature content will be in this story) The Pines twins, Dipper and Mabel, are forced to spend their summer with their great uncle Stan in his beatdown summer camp simply called "Cam...
