(It is the year 207012. It is a much tougher time. An infamous fugitive by the name of Blendin Blandin has escaped from prison with the police after him)
Dundgren: I gotta hand it to this son of a bitch. No one has ever broken out of the Infinitentiary before.
Lolph: He's either the bravest time convict there is or the dumbest.
Blendin: (Runs into a wall) Ow! (Stumbles into barrels) Oh! My time knee! Oh, time damn it!
Dundgren: Definitely the dumbest.
Lolph: Freeze! You're surrounded by the Time Paradox Avoidance Enforcement Squadron! Anything you say can and already has been used against you in future court.
Dundgren: This is it, Blendin. End of the timeline. Any last words?
Blendin: Uh-Uh-Uh-Uh-I... I INVOKE GLOBNAR!!!
Dundgren: Globnar, huh? Very well then. Speak of the name and century of those accused.
Blendin: There are five kids that ruined my life. Twins Dipper and Mabel Pines, Max Collins, Nikki Park, and Neil Affleck. 21st century.
(Dundgren goes through his tablet and searches through his documents. He finds a clip of the five kids lighting up firecrackers and aiming them at trees. One accidentally hits David)
Lolph: So be it. May Time Baby have mercy on their souls.
21ST CENTURY
(The Camp Camp kids come across a vending machine while walking around town. They attempt to get some candy, but the first bar gets stuck)
Dipper: Shit! It's stuck!
Space Kid: Now we'll never get the peanut coated goodness now!
Mabel: Everything is terrible forever!
Soos: Psst. Hey, dudes? Wanna know a trick? (Hits the vending machine with his hand and elbow) Bibbity-boop. Wop!
(The entire vending machine opens)
Soos: A genius taught me that one. (Grabs a handful) This just in: weather stations are calling for a.... candy blizzard! (Throws candy at them)
Mabel: Forget taking the wrappers off! I'm eating these right now! (Stuffs a bundle of unwrapped candy in her mouth)
Nikki: Soos, you are amazing! You must be the greatest wizard ever!
Harrison: That or the best human ever.
Mabel: (choking) That was a mistake! (Collapses)
Soos: Heh, no sweat, dude. I'd do anything for this camp.
Stanley: C'mon, people, let's get the hell out of here. I need Soos to help me masturbate.
Soos: And I mean anything. Coming, Mr. Pines! (Runs up to him)
Mabel: (coughs while Neil is performing the Heimlich maneuver)
Neil: Mabel, please don't attempt to choke on anything that takes common sense to fix.
Mabel: Lesson learned, buddy. Lesson learned...
(Max notices that Soos's wallet fell out of his pocket)
Max: Hey, look at this. Now's the perfect chance to get all the dirt Soos has.
Dipper: Max, I'm not sure about this. I don't think Soos even has that many secrets about him.
Max: Well... How about this? (Pulls out a card)
Dipper: Whoa! Soos has a membership to Laser Tag? I didn't think they'd let grown-ups in that place!
YOU ARE READING
Gravity Falls In This Camp
Фанфик(WARNING: This story will not be for the faint of heart. Cussing and mature content will be in this story) The Pines twins, Dipper and Mabel, are forced to spend their summer with their great uncle Stan in his beatdown summer camp simply called "Cam...
