Like Buttons On A Shirt

Chapter 36

"You know...", Gerard said after a while, "I am super afraid of needles."

"Of... needles?", I asked again because I wasnt sure if I heard him right over the rain.
"Yes needles", he replied.
Okay but... what was I supposed to do with that information? And why did he even say that in the first place?

"Uhm... sorry?", i said.
Maybe he was also kind of freaking out inside because we were in a hospital. And there are needles in hospital. Syringes and shit like that. Maybe he was also scared.

"No you idiot", Gerard giggled and slightly pushed my shoulder.
"I'm trying to say that you're not the only one with weird fears"

"You think my fear is weird?"

I didnt have to see Gerards face face to know that he was dumbfounded and that almost made me laugh myself.
Of course I knew that's not what he was trying to say but I could feel myself relax when I talked to him so I thought a little joke wouldn't be too bad.

"Di you just miss the point of that SO hard?", he then asked and I couldn't hold it anymore.
I just burst out laughing.

Okay maybe all of that wasnt that funny at all but in that exact moment it was the funniest shit I've ever heard in my life. Maybe it was the panic still going strong inside of me. Maybe it's just me trying to relieve the tension inside.
Maybe it's maybelline.

Great now my thoughts made me laugh even harder.

"Okay what the fuck is going on right now?", Gerard asked.
I could hear confusion in his voice but also some kind of excitement.

"Nothing", I said while still giggling, "really I just... I dont know why that was so funny to me right now. But I get what you were trying to say"

"Good because I am the only one here who is allowed to be overly dramatic"

It took some more time for me to fully calm down from that little attack I just had (or whatever I should call that) but when I had calmed down I decided to turn around to face Gerard.

The bed was a lot smaller than Gerards huge one at the mansion so his face was practically touching mine when I turned around but honestly.... I didn't mind. I had accepted that I had feelings for Gerard now I just bad to fund out if he felt the same.

"Why are you scared of needles?", I asked in a whisper.
Somehow speaking normally just didn't feel right. Its like there was this imaginary bubble around us and speaking to loud would just make it pop.
And I didbt want that. Because right now I could forget that we were trapped inside a hospital with a tornado probably coming right at us and my mother still upstairs.

"Isn't that kind of obvious?", Gerard asked, "needles are creepy as fuck. Like... just picture it going through the layers of your skin and searching for the artery like damn! I'm not letting this thing near me!"
The way he described all this made me shiver too.

"You're right they are kind of scary", I admitted.

This time Gerard laughed.
"You are like... literally covered in tattoos. How can you find needles scary?"

"That's different! First of alk the needles are way smaller and they don't go all the way through the skin to the artery or whatever you're trying to poke. They just... scratch the surface, you know? Most of them didnt even hurt", I explained.

"Which ones hurt?", Gerard asked but his voice sounded different all of a sudden. His whispers got even quieter even though I didn't think that would be possible.

I had to think about that for a moment. The ones on my arms didn't hurt at all.
"The one on my hip was the first one I remember hurting", I said.

"This one?", he asked.
I sucked in a breath.
He put his hand under my shirt and began stroking my side gently.
Oh lord... what was he doing?
He didn't stop even after I let a few minutes pass.

I think I figured out what he was doing so I decided to test it.
"The... The one on my chest hurt too. The one right above my nipple", I said. Even though I tried my hardest I couldn't hold back the little stutter. Something about Gerards Hands on my skin just made me forget how to speak.

"Oh... over here?", he asked and let his hands wander up and over to my chest.
Of course he took his sweet time with it, going over my stomache a little and gracing both my nipples before landing where I told him to. There he traced around with his fingers, giving my whole body goosebumps.

I felt myself grow hard.
Fuck.
The way I could only see the outline of his face and not even decipher his look made everything better and worse at the same time.

He graced over my nipple again and I had to hold back a moan.
Fuck I wanted to kiss him again.
But I also wanted to test out how far he would go.

"Do you want to know which one hurt the most?", I asked.

"Yeah", he practically breathed out right into my ear. I shuddered.
"The one on my right inner thigh."

I could feel Gerard hesitating. Because if he wanted to keep up this game he would have to go right into my pants and touch my dick. That is if he really wanted to find the tattoo.

"Do you actually have a tattoo there?", he asked, probably to give himself some time to debate this situation and what to do with it.

I didn't have a tattoo on my inner thigh.
But as I was laying there with Gerards hands on my chest I had this incredibly strong urge to get one as soon as possible.
Of Gerards name.
And Gerards face.
And Gerards address.
In Gerards favourite colour.
I felt like I was going insane if he wouldn't touch me more right about now.
I just wanted Gerard.
Wanted him on me.
In me.
With me...

I shuddered again when he touched my nipple and that gave me the last bit of strength I needed to take the next step.

"Come and find out", I said and opened my belt.

*A/N*

Okay so we are at a very important point at the story where you have to help me choose what to do next.

So I have two ways this story can go.

The only difference is that one will contain smut and one wont. Now you have to decide if you want to read smut or if you'd rather keep it down like it was until now.

The outcome will be the exact same, like the choice will not affect the ending of the story.

I just need to know if yall want smut or not :) I'm prepared for both.

Also: I know you guys wont like that but this story is slowly coming to an end. There won't be too many chapters left so like in "Project: Homophobia is gay" I want you to tell me what you would want to read next.
For that, please go over to my "fanfic ideas" book where I put a brief summary of ideas I have and tell me here which one you want me to write next.

Also if you have your own ideas that I dont have in my book then you can also tell me and maybe we can work together on an inspiration
:3

Thank you so much in advance for helping me decide those two things.

Again:

1.) Smut or no smut?

2.) Which book to write next?