NANNY FOR MENDES.

Hundred-fourteen

𝗦𝗢𝗣𝗛'𝗦 𝗣𝗢𝗩

I couldn't sleep at all, because I couldn't stop thinking.

It's been seven long years since I've seen my estranged father, save for last night. It was such a shock. I knew I would see him eventually, one day. Just not so soon, and certainly not in a ball. But what really got to me was the fact that Noah was my stepbrother. This.... I don't know what to do about it, in all honesty. I intentionally avoided anything about Dad in the media. Stupid me. If only I tried to know anything about him, I would know Noah was my stepbrother. But....I didn't.

The bed rattles. Shawn.

I kept my back to him all night, scared he'd be awake and see me if I turned around. I wanted my head on his chest so bad, but I also didn't want him to see me. This side of me: the weak vulnerable me. He's seen it before, but I still don't want him to. I think that, this time is the worst of them all. Shawn has seen me vulnerable, but not that vulnerable.

It's been about five minutes since Shawn got out of our bed. I hear the bathroom door open, and turn around. He frowns when he sees me. I frown.

"You haven't slept?" I ask him.

He shrugs. "Neither have you."

"It's my shit, not yours. And you have work!"

"Work? I'm not going to work today."

"And why is that?" I ask, angrily.

"Really? You're asking me why." He snorts.

"Shawn, go to work."

He rolls his eyes and joins me in bed. He pulls me to him.

"I'm serious. Go."

"No, Soph."

"Then sleep."

He shrugs. "I don't think I want to sleep."

"You need to sleep."

He shrugs again.

"Why didn't you sleep?"

"Well, you were crying your heart out.... and I just couldn't sleep when you were like this. I was afraid you'd need me at night, and I'd be asleep."

If it wasn't for the shit I'm in, I would smile.

I pull back. "Shawn, go to work. Please."

"No."

"Shawn."

"No."

I sigh. "I wanna be alone, Shawn. I'm sorry to be asking you to leave your house, but it's not like I have somewhere to go and—"

"I can't leave you alone. And please, it's our house." He shakes his head.

"Shawn, please. I need some time alone."

He hesitates at first, but then, "okay. If you really wanna be alone, then I'll go." He nods and goes fetch some clothes from our closet.

"Thank you." I mutter.

He nods again, puts his clothes on the bed beside me and goes to the bathroom to shower.

Five minutes later, he comes out of the bathroom and starts getting dressed. If we were under different circumstances, I'd think about how sexy he is.

When he buttons his shirt—the last thing he does—he says, "if you need me, just call me."

He turns around the bed—to my side—and kisses my forehead. "I love you."