NANNY FOR MENDES.

Hundred-thirty-three

A few days later...

Today, I'm meeting Dad.

Yesterday, he called Shawn to ask about me;  Shawn put the call on speaker. It kind of took me off-guard, but I liked that he actually gave a shit. He also asked if he could meet me. As Shawn was about to say no, I nodded my head and accepted. Shawn looked at me in confusion first, but told him to come over today.

After Shawn hung up, he looked at me with puzzlement. "Just a few days ago you didn't want to look at his face. What made you change your mind?"

"I want to get it over with. Until when will I keep saying I'm not ready? He's my father at the end of the day." I shrugged.

"I'm proud of you." He smiled.

Dad will be here any minute. I'm so nervous my hands are sweaty.

"Relax. It's okay." Shawn tells me, worry creasing his forehead.

"I'm so very nervous."

"Baby, it's going to be just fine."

"What if what happened at your company happens again?"

"Then I'll support you until you get out of it again."

Wow. This man. I actually manage to smile despite my nerves.

"I love you." I tell him.

"Of course you do. What's not to love?" He smiles wickedly.

I laugh. "Cocky much?"

"No. Just a little."

I laugh harder.

"I missed this sound. You should laugh more. The world would be a much better place if everybody heard your laugh."

"Awe. Where do you find these beautiful words?"

"Here." He spreads his palm flat over his heart. "Because I love you so much."

I take his face in both of my palms, lean in and connect our lips.

That's when the bell rings. Lovely. Great. This could've turned into an intense make-out session. But no, my dad had to— wait. That's Dad! Shawn distracted me when he made me laugh and I wanted to kiss him so I totally forgot about him momentarily.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

My nerves are frozen. My heart is pounding. My hands are sweaty.

"Relax, baby." He puts his hands on my shoulders.

"I'm going to open that door." He announces.

I nod and wait. 

"Hello, Anthony." Shawn greets Dad. Fuck.

"Hello, Shawn. How is she?"

"You'll see. Come with me."

And they appear in front of me. I look up, and my eyes meet my father's. I won't cry. I won't. 

"Cry if you want. Why are you holding back your tears?" Dad says. "It's okay if you cry. It's natural." 

"I won't cry." I say harshly, angrily. "Sit down, Dad."

"I'll be in our bedroom, if you need anything." Shawn says and leaves us alone.

"Talk, Dad. I'll listen to you then I'll tell you everything I wanted to tell you in the last seven years."

"I'm so sorry for the last seven years, Sophia. I really am. And I know you want actual reasons, unlike the ones I told you in your fiancé's office. But I really have no reasons. I was an ass. An ass who didn't appreciate what he had. I have absolutely no reasons. I know this answer is unsatisfying but that's what I have. All I know is that I want us to start over. I want to have a relationship with you. I was going to say that I wanted you to meet my wife and stepson, but... you already know Noah..."