Sins Of The Mother (TRLS)

Chapter 13

Tom and Jimmy were like night and day. Jimmy just had this thing about him that made me feel like he would always be there for me. When I talk, he listens and he understands. He's the first real friend I've had in a long time. He makes me forget why I'm actually here, he makes me see the beauty in life. With a wine glass filled with apple juice I sat by the pool in the backyard. I had to face my issues without the help of any vices. Jimmy was a big help. When my mind drifted to Tom instead of having glass of wine I invited Jimmy to come over. We would talk and he'd tell me about his past and how he got into the music industry. He was in the military and that's where he learned to play guitar, he said singing helped him get through those harsh days. When he was finally done with his service he followed his dreams. Now he's one of the most talked about men in the business. He was kind, and for what he lacked in intelligence he made up for in depth. His soul was as vast as the ocean and as colorful as a parade in the summertime. He made me remember who I used to be. He made me remember Roslyn Goldsworthy, and forget Roslyn Riddle.

     I realized I wasn't living life right. I was hurting myself and I was going down a path that only leads to devastation. I wasn't giving my time to my children, I was too focused on my stupid singing career to realize I was killing myself. I had to slow down and refocus. I had to save myself, because now I'm reminded that I'm worth it. I'm not my failed marriage, or my mistakes. I'm a talented, beautiful woman that has a heart of gold and would do anything for the people I love. I traced random shapes in the water with my finger tips as I sat by the pool. Everyday gets a little easier, but I'm still burdened with my thoughts and anxieties. I know the plan to marry Jimmy was still on the table for the producers but I hadn't heard anyone mention it after that. I had to take a break from the show for a week, Jimmy told them I was sick, and only he and I knew what happened that night. It would always be our secret, he promised that to me. Hermelda had gone out to get groceries while it happened, she never had a clue what had gone on.

I gasped as I began to see another reflection in the pool besides mine. I quickly turned around but when I did there was no one there. I looked back to the pool to only see my reflection and I shook my head and rubbed my face with my hand. I must be going insane. I got up from my seat at the pool and walked inside. "Hermelda? I could've sworn I just saw-" I was cut off by the sheer shock of finding the body of my nanny on the ground. My glass shattered as it fell to ground as I rushed forward to her still body. I heard her gasping for air as I turned her over. Her eyes were wide and she was covering her heart with her hand. "Hermelda?! Hermelda can you hear me?!" I yelled. I panicked as she started to try and breath but wasn't able to take a breath. Her eyes stared at me begging for me to help. "What can I do?! Hermelda please breath!" I don't know how to revive someone. A thought entered my mind but I quickly casted it aside. Magic is out out of the question, but the more I looked at her the more scared I got when she didn't seem to be able to take a breath. I need to do something now or she will die here on my floor. I growled in frustration and I rushed up from my spot on the floor and ran to my bedroom to retrieve my wand from the box it has been housed in for months now.

   I hesitated before grasping it and all at once horrible memories clouded my vision. I have to fight them, I need to save her. It's almost as if saving her would somehow make up for what I have done. I can't let her die here not like this. It's been so long since I've used magic it was hard to think of a spell, but as if someone planted it in my mind I thought of something. "Alright Hermelda everything is gonna be okay." I can tell she is loosing consciousness. I can do this. "Brackium Emendo," I said and in an instant she was taking a deep breath. I dropped my wand to the floor and lunged forward to put her head on my lap. "Oh my goodness Hermelda take it slow now. Thank the Heavens," I said as I softly stroked the grey hair of my dear friend who has helped me so much. She started to take deep breaths until she passed out, but I know she is okay, her heart beat is strong.

    I erased her memory of me using magic and replaced it with me reviving her naturally. Maybe I should keep this handy, I thought, as picked my wand up off the floor. Then again maybe not, my life has been much more peaceful without the help of magic. I forever will believe magic is only good for the good it can do. What I did tonight was good but I won't make a habit of it. My children are better to be spared from the burden of magic.

"Magic is only good for the good it can do."

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Thank you Sweet_Yammie  for the beautiful cover! You're amazing!