First one

One hundred and Fifteen: Hey talk to me

Lukas's POV

I sat there looking into the smoldering wood surrounded by flames, my eyes pinned on it, but my thoughts somewhere else. I can't believe she wanted to see me! I can't fucking believe I didn't know because I broke my phone. I'm such an idiot... Dammit. "Mia, has she called back already?" I turned to my sister who had been looking at her phone for the past thirty minutes.

She shook her head. "No, she hasn't... I left her several texts... They won't deliver." I frowned my brows at her statement. What do you mean they won't deliver? "Maybe her phone is off?" She whispered as she noticed my concerned frown.

Not being able to reach her and being more than three hours away from her was killing me. I sighed, rubbing my face with frustration as my stomach was filled with worry and anticipation. I need to see her. I need to tell her my phone was broken. That I would have showed up without a doubt... "I can't take the wait anymore..." I sighed, pushing my hands trough my hair. "I need to go back home." I stated and my mom's face fell with disappointment. "I'm sorry... I know it's Thanksgiving, but I can't sit here and do nothing knowing I can fix it right now." I addressed my mom whose expression turned into a smile.

"Lukas, honey it's okay... If that's what you need to do than do it." Mom smiled at me and it reassured me more than she could ever imagine.

My dad leaned into her, giving me a genuine smile. "Your mom is right... We'll make up for missed time on Christmas. You just make sure you'll be able to bring her." He nodded towards the house, granting me permission to leave early.

"Thanks. I hope so!" I rushed, throwing the blanket dad put over us earlier off me with a sense of urgency. 

"I'll drive Mia home tomorrow, don't worry." My dad offered instantly, making Mia's face turn into a frown.

"What no, dad! I'm going with him; something doesn't feel right." She shook her head, getting up as well, quickly making her way to our parents. "I'm sorry." She said while pulling mum into a bearhug.

"Christmas?" Mom asked, hoping to see more of us then, more in terms of time and probably more in terms of people...

"Yes, we'll make it up." She whispered as she went to give dad a hug.

"Mia why don't you already take our stuff and put it in the car." I addressed her, nodding towards the house. She frowned at first but then she realized I just wanted a moment with them. As I watched Mia walk away from the firepit I turned to mom and dad.

I rubbed the back of my head nervously, not knowing how to say whatever I needed to say for a long time. "I'm so sorry for how I have acted the last couple of years." I shook my head with disappointment, angry at myself for the way I acted out, giving them a hard time while all they tried to do was keep me out of trouble.

"Luke, it's o-" My mom smiled at me satisfied, trying to interrupt me but I needed to say this.

"No mom, it's not... I went to Logan's grave last week..." I let my head hang low until I felt dads hand on the side of my arm trying to comfort me.

"Oh honey, why? Why torture yourself like that?" The worry in her voice clearly there as dad's hand held on to me more. 

"Advice? To deal with it... I acted out because I didn't know how to behave, because I blamed myself for what happened every single day, because I never understood why I got to live, and he didn't." I started, my voice quickly holding a ray of sad emotions. 

"Son it wasn't your fault." My dad shook his head, his voice sincere. He really thinks so?

I shook my head, still not believe there was nothing I could have done differently, because I could have. "I should have taken his keys. I shouldn't have been so arrogant to think I could still drive..."