the checklist | fillie au

♡ chapter 20 ♡

finn's pov

dear dickhead, my finnie

i love you. i know it's probably too soon but i love you. you probably don't love me back and that's fine, just know that i do. every time i was with you, you've made me extremely happy. the happiest I've ever been in my entire life and i thank you so much for that. but now, now even when i'm with you, the little things you used to do that made me happy doesn't even make me crack a smile. i can't do this anymore. i can't take the pain. it fucking hurts. it hurts so damn much. for the past week, i couldn't sleep at all. i would fall asleep and see my fathers face. i can't sleep, he won't go away! i tried sleeping pills and they won't work either. i tried cutting, i cutted more but it only took a bit of my pain anyway. i know the universe hates me and i have accepted that it doesn't want me to be happy, but that's okay because for the past 3 months you made me the happiest person ever. and as for the checklist, i think i owe you an explanation. i made that stupid thing after the whole jacob thing. i made myself promise i would finish it before i die because i know i wouldn't be able to finish those stuff. yeah the mysterious place i craved to go was heaven. as for now we've finished most things but there's one more thing i'd like to add that only you could help me finish. promise me, promise me you'll move on from me. don't sit around and be sad over a stupid girl. find a girl you love that loves you back and marry her, start a family. have little finns running around. that's all i want. tell ava i love her and help me kiss and sing her goodnight.

i love you, goodbye finn.

ps: please help me check my grade for the english test, i worked hard :(

love mills ♡

i stare at the letter in front of me as tears spill from my eyes. soon i'm sobbing in the waiting room. the letter gets soaked by my own tears and i put it back into the ripped up envelope.

i glance to the clock to see that i have been here for 2 almost 3 hours. the gang is on their way and i don't know if i should give them their letters. i don't know, i guess it sounds selfish.

i look up and see the gang walk through the glass automatic doors. they spot me and quickly run over to hug me.

"how is she?" noah asks

"i don't know, they won't let me see her" i say above a whisper

"bullshit" sadie growls as she stomps over to the reception

i could hear sadie yelling from a distance trying to let us see her but they still wouldn't. i hear sadie sigh as she walks back over to us

"u-um these are for you guys" i sniff, handing the letters to everyone as their eyes widen

"anyone here for millie bobby brown?" a nurse asks as we all turn to her

"we are! can we see her?" i ask as the nurse nods

we all run to millie's room and we see her unconscious on the bed. i walk over to her and pull a chair to sit by the desk.

"mills?" i whisper but there was no reply. the room was dead silent except for the beeping on the monitor.

"when is she gonna wake up?" i ask the nurse as i held her hand