Emote: Bakugo x OC Reader

Chapter 92

Author's note: When I say I was FUCKING SHOOK by your responses when I talked about my struggles in the last chapter I'm not exaggerating. I think that I responded to everyone who took the time to comment on that but if I missed you, know that I saw it and it fueled my heart fire. I can't even express to you all how much your words, thoughts, whatever you could spare, means to me. Thank you again and always for being here and for supporting me and my work. Sometimes I have funks where I question my worth or the worth of my achievements and other days I feel great. I was inspired to write this chapter today after an idea came to me that literally had me avoiding work so I could finish this and I fucking love this chapter, I'm not going to lie, so please enjoy. 

I stared at the math equation, trying the formula again for what felt like the hundredth time, before a fluffy calico orbit edged into my view before plopping down on my notebook.

"Kiko, I swear to God, why are you so needy today?" I complained, resting my forehead on the soft fur of her back. I was met with a loud, rumbling purr in response.

After filing the report a few days ago, I'd confessed to Aizawa that in my frantic state of survival that day, I had grabbed Kiko and snuck her into the dorms. After admitting it, I had cringed, looking down to avoid the wrath in my teacher's eyes that I was sure to come. But after a few moments, I'd looked up and caught one of the corners of his lips twitching up into what I could have sworn was a smile, but it was gone as quickly as it came.

"I'll allow it," He said before clearing his throat and turning away from me. "Just clean up after it and if it becomes too disruptive, it's out."

"He must be a cat guy, huh, Kiko?" I said, sitting up and running my hand across her back. She meowed in response before flopping onto her side, effectively covering up any chance I had to try to figure out that damn problem.

"So, this is my cue to take a break from studying?"

Kiko purred contentedly, her eyes already closed. I snuck a glance at my phone, the neon light illuminating the time, showing 8:15 PM. My thoughts went to Katsuki and how we'd spent time together after I'd tried on my hero costume before he told me he wanted to study on his own for the rest of the night. I had done my best to hide my disappointment, not wanting to come across as too needy or clingy, but if I was being honest with myself I wanted to at least see him once more before he went to bed.

Is that selfish? I thought and yet, even as it crossed my mind, my feet were already moving. It had never failed that since I'd met this boy months ago, I was drawn to him, over and over again, like a magnetic force that was beyond anything I could begin to comprehend.

I knew that he would probably be getting ready for bed and wasn't sure if he'd see a text if I sent it. At least that was the excuse that I kept telling myself as my bare feet padded along the carpet of the hallway leading to his room. As I came to stand in front of his door, I felt a sudden wave of nervous energy rush through me. Lifting an unsteady hand and slowly forming a fist, I pulled it back to knock but that's when I heard it. Pressing my ear to the door I heard his deep, low voice humming a melody, or was it...

He's singing. I thought in utter disbelief. Pulling back, I swiveled my head back and forth, checking my surroundings to confirm that I was, in fact, at Katsuki's room. Shaking my head to rid myself of any doubts, I knocked firmly on the door and waited for a moment. When I heard no movement on the other side of the door, I tried again, but still no answer.

He might actually kill me for this, but I can't seem to stop myself. I thought nervously, as my hand closed in around the doorknob. As I pushed the door open, I made a point to loudly say, "Katsuki?"

I froze as the full force of his singing struck me. It wasn't that he was singing loudly, in fact, the lyrics that fell from his mouth were soft despite his deep, rich voice. The haunting melody washed over me as I took a step into the room.

"I see fire...inside the mountain, I see fire...burning the trees, and I see fire, hollowing souls, I see fire...blood in the breeze. And I hope that you'll remember me."

His headphones were in which explained why he couldn't hear me, but now that I was in the room, he should have at least seen me in his peripherals. Yet, his crimson eyes were staring at the textbook in front of him as though they were unseeing. A pen hung in one hand, twirling through his fingers as he continued to quietly sing. Looking at his profile, his expression seemed calm, the features of his face soft and relaxed.

When I began waving my hands in front of me to try to get his attention, nothing happened. He didn't move, didn't turn and start screaming as I anticipated he might, but rather continued to stare at the textbook in front of him. I considered turning around and walking out but it felt like I was in too deep at this point. And beyond that, there was a sinking worry that was beginning to set in. It felt similar to the morning we had woke up together and he spaced out right before Shinso came into the room. Where had he gone to? I wondered, as I slowly approached, still waving my arms, but I continued to get no response. 

Sucking in a deep breath and reaching a hand out, I spoke loudly before tapping on his shoulder. "Katsuki?"

It happened in an instant. The reaction was harsh and immediate, the chair toppling out from under him as he stood, the earbuds popping out and falling to the ground as his hand roughly gripped my shoulder, pushing me back until I slammed against the wall. His opposite hand held the pen up as though he was about to strike it into the soft flesh of my neck before I held my hands up, my voice shaking as I said, "It's me, it's me!"

His eyes were wild for a moment, his chest heaving as I slowly moved my hand to rest over his, which was digging into my shoulder tightly.

"Wh...why are you scared?" I said it without thinking after the emotion hit me full force like a scream trapped in a silent room.

He let go of my shoulder at the same time he dropped the pen, backing up slowly as his eyes seemed to adjust. "What the fuck, Y/n?! When did you get in here?! Jesus, what the fuck is your problem?! You can't just come barging into my room like you own the place! And did you say I was scared? HA! Your dumb ass quirk is totally off, I don't get scared! Ya know what, I'm sick of all your emotion bullshit, ya know that? Did you ever consider that's why I wanted to study alone tonight?"

There was more venom in his tone than usual and it stung as his words sunk in. His crimson eyes were furious as they bore into me but I didn't miss the sheen of sweat that had broke out across his forehead or the slight tremor in his voice.

"Can I help you calm down?" I said hesitantly, reaching a hand out slowly, but he only backed up further.

"No! I don't need to be calm, I need to be left the fuck alone, is that too much to ask?!" His lips curled up as he practically growled the words out.

"Katsuki, what -" The words stuck in my throat, as though they knew that this was not the time for them to be spoken, not while facing the fiery wall of defense this boy had built around himself in this moment. "Never mind. I'll leave you alone."

I turned swiftly, somewhat expecting him to protest but not feeling surprised when he didn't, and left the room, firmly closing the door behind me before leaning against it and trying to steady the pounding of my heart and overwhelming sense of grief I suddenly felt.

Katsuki, what have you been carrying since you were captured by the villains and how the hell can I help fix it?