The unrestrained

Lotus seed pods

What brother said is really true. After his departure, the cloud recesses become quiet again. Shufu seems quite satisfied in taking classes because there was no rule breakers or trouble makers like Wei Ying. But to me, I felt like heart broken and bored. I recalled everything he said to me when he was here. I miss every moment about him.

After the classes over I went to night hunts. Night hunts whether it is big or small I'll do it. As I'm a person who appears where chao is.

When I was mounting on my sword I saw the liquor shop which sells emperor's smile, it reminds me of his beautiful smiling face.

The caiyi town reminds me when he gave me loquats and I'm stupid to reject it.

The biling lake reminds me when we exterminate water ghouls.

Every part of Gusu and cloud recesses reminds me of him.

I'm sure that he is having a good time in Lotus cove more than in cloud recesses. When he play with his junior disciples at yumeng does he think of me? I'm thinking about him every moment, every second.

I kept the rabbits he gave me and I came to visit them often. They love my company. I pet them, feed them and even talk with them.

One day while I was petting the rabbits my brother came towards me. "Wangji, you're here."

I bowed to him, "xiong Zhang"

Brother asked, "rabbits? When did you started raising them? I really want to ask you about this. I saw you the other day talking with them."

I said, "just a month ago."

Brother sighed, "no one has ever kept rabbits within cloud recesses. This doesn't comply with the rules."

I replied stroking one rabbit in my arms, "I know... But I have already made a promise. I cannot go back on my word."

Brother asked, "how can a joke between youths be considered a formal promise?"

I pouted. "Xiong Zhang."

Brother smiled, "all right in case shufu asks, you should explain it to him properly. These past few days, the time you've spent on them has been a bit too much."

I bowed politely to brother and spoke, "Thanks Xiong Zhang, it won't affect my studies."

Brother said, "I know you won't let it. But no matter what, you must not tell shufu who gave them to you. Otherwise, he will be furious. He will definitely tell you to send them away."

I nodded, "mn." And hugged the little rabbits tight. No I won't let that happen.

Brother laughed at my possessiveness, "hehe, but there is no need to hold them so tightly."

I became flustered, "I"

Brother spoke, "shufu isn't an unreasonable person. I'll take my leave."

I nodded. Brother left from the grass lawn. I fullfilled my promise.

After my night hunts I returned to Gusu and bought some gadgets. I even bought a cutsleeve pornographic book. In the jingshi I analysed the various positions that is picturised in the book. I already learned the trick from him that how to hide these from normal books. So I couldn't get caught.

In my dreams I keep on having sexual fantasies about him. How shameless of me? But I couldn't help. I'm obsessed about him. I want my fantasies to be real.

Because of him, I'm starting to think his way. What's the point of obeying rules? Sometimes breaking some of the rules isn't so bad. Just be righteous and have a good heart. Everytime I miss him I hold that portrait he gave to me, close to my heart. I kept portrait like a treasure. It was indeed a treasure. The crumbled papers he wrote back at the library pavillion, seeing all these memories I felt sad. He is not here.