The unrestrained

Regulate oneself

Months passed. My everyday routine seems like it used to be. Going for night hunts, attending lectures, meeting brother and uncle as usual. Despite everything I missed him. There is no news about him. I felt sad and lonely and an year passed like a rush.

I turned sixteen the very next year. One day we received an invitation from Qishan. At Qishan, the Wen Sect decided to held a grand Discussion Conference. The conference was to last for seven days. Each of the seven days’ entertainment had been planned to be different. One of those days involved an archery competition. Our sect was invited.

The rules of the competition were as follows. Any disciples younger than twenty were to enter the hunting grounds. Of the more than a thousand life-sized paper mannequin targets, only one hundred were possessed by fierce spirits. If one shot the wrong target, they were out at once. One could only stay in the competition if they continuously shot correct paper mannequins that held evil spirits in them. In the end, the disciples were ranked by who shot the most, who shot with highest accuracy, and so on.

When I received the invitation I thought that since the Qishan Wen sect invited us did they they invite the yunmeng jiang sect as well? If they do I can't wait to see him.

After a few days me, my brother and a few of our disciples reached Qishan. When I walking there were a lot of distinguished guests. Everyone is here for the discussion conference. On top of that the junior disciples like me was here of course for the archery competition. Before the competition, since I had been listening to the sects’ debates for the entire morning, I was feeling a bit drowsy. In the afternoon, the archery competition has started. I put on my red archery  robes. As I walk towards the venue I saw him. He was beautiful in that red archery robes. I carried my bow and arrows. I felt embarrassed. For this whole year I've had such dirty thoughts about him in my sleep and because of him I even start to look at pornographic books. I couldn't look at his face. He was laughing merrily. He put his hand on a yunmeng jiang sect disciple's shoulder. There was a sudden rage came inside of me. I lifted the bow string on purpose, suppressing my anger. The sound was so loud it reached his ears.

He rushed towards me and he  greeted me with enthusiasm, “Hey! WangJi-xiong, it’s you!”

I felt too embarrassed. I walked away at once. Awkwardly, he turned to Jiang wanyin, “He ignored me again. Huh.”

There were more than twenty entrances to the shooting range; each sect’s was different. As I walked toward the entrance of the Gusu Lan Sect, he sneaked over before I could. I shifted to the one side, and he shifted to the side as well; I moved to the other side, and he moved to the other side as well. In short, he simply refused to let me pass.

I'm too shy. I've seen him after an year. Seeing his face remind me of my silly thoughts. But I suppressed my unfinished desires. In the end, standing where he was, I raised my chin slightly. In a serious tone, I  spoke, “Excuse me.”

He asked,  “You’re finally gonna talk to me? Were you pretending that you didn’t know me or that you didn’t hear me?”

I.. I ... I don't know what to say. I was utterly speechless. I couldn't even look into his face properly.

Not far away, the boys from other sects all stared at us. Some laughed, some exclaimed. Jiang wanyin clicked his tongue impatiently. With arrows on his back, he walked toward another entrance.

I raised my eyes coldly and repeated, “Excuse me.”

A faint smile by his lips, he raised his brows and turned to the side. The arch door of the entrance was rather narrow. I could only brush by him as I walked in. After I entered, he shouted from behind me, “Lan Zhan, your forehead ribbon is crooked.”

Crooked. I always tied my forehead ribbon properly. Hearing this, I reached to adjust it without a second thought. Yet, the forehead ribbon was clearly as proper as always. Huh! you tricked me. Hmph! Turning around, I casted an annoyed look at him. The latter only laughed as he turned to the Yunmeng Jiang Sect’s entrance.

After everyone had entered and the competition had officially began, one by one, disciples left due to accidentally shooting normal mannequins. With each shot, he brought one down. Although he was slow, he never missed once. The number of arrows in the quiver soon decreased by seventeen or eighteen. I also shot bulls eyes. The crowd cheered, appreciating the talents.  After my shoot I decided to walk away. I think he wants to say something to me so I walked near him. His cheek touched my forehead ribbon. It was so long and soft. He turned around, and saw that I had already walked near him. With my back facing him and front to a paper mannequin, I was in the process of drawing my bow.

The cold breeze was really felt like a relief. The ends of my forehead ribbon danced in the breeze, gently brushing against his face.

He squinted, “WangJi-xiong!”

With my bow already in the shape of a full moon, I still responded after a short moment of hesitation, “What?”

He said it again, “Your forehead ribbon is crooked.”

Not again. You tricked me once. I don't believe you. As I  released my arrow, I replied without even turning around, “Ridiculous.”

He said, “It’s true this time! It really is crooked. Just watch if you don’t believe me. Let me straighten it up for you.”

What is he going to do? He proceeded as he spoke, grabbing the ribbon tail that kept on fluttering in front of his eyes. He tugged on my forehead ribbon and pulled it off. It fell from from my forehead at once. What have you done Wei Ying?

The hand that I held the bow with immediately gave out a shiver.

I only managed to turn around after quite a long while. Slowly, my eyes finally locked into him. I can't believe he pulled my forehead ribbon.

He was still holding my ribbon in his hand, “I’m sorry. It wasn’t on purpose. Here, you can tie it up again.”

My expression was darker than ever.

Since he pulled this. He is the one. The one that is destined for me. There was a backstory behind the Gusu lan sects forehead ribbon and what it represents.

The forehead ribbon of the GusuLan Sect means to “regulate oneself". And the founder of the GusuLan Sect, Lan An, had said that one can only let go of all regulations when they are with the one they love and cherish. So, the message that has been passed down the generations is that, our sect’s forehead ribbon is a special object that is very, very personal and sensitive. One cannot easily give another permission to touch it, one cannot take it off as they please, and one absolutely cannot tie it on someone else. It is prohibited. That is, unless, it is wife or a lover.

I was shaking with fear, anger and embarrassment on the outside and on the inside I felt shy. He squeezed my ribbon. I felt shocked.

I snatched the forehead ribbon from his hands as fast as I could.

I walked away in embarrassment and I tied my forehead ribbon. My brother and other disciples saw what happened. I felt quite shy. He comforted me, "it's okay, Wangji, he didn't mean to embarrass you". All of the others seemed similarly serious, as though they were facing a powerful enemy. They shook their heads as they spoke, glancing at him with odd, indescribable looks on their faces. "This Wei gongzi, why did he do such a thing? If he knew about the meaning of this he wouldn't dare to do such a thing".

My brother said, "it was an accident, let's not bother about it". After glowering at him one last time, I turned around and walked alone toward the outside of the range. He did this in front of entire public.

After the results where announced I didn't want to stay there longer. I walked from Qishan and left for Gusu without even receiving my prize for the  archery competition.