Letters to Chanyeol

Present Time

I did not turn around when you called my name. Feels familiar, right? I was able to do the exact same thing you did to me three years ago. The only difference was this time, it was me who was walking away from you. It was me who was leaving you.

I immediately took a cab and called Kyungsoo. He was right, I can't do this. I already signed the papers so there was no need for me to see Chanyeol again.

I just need to start moving on again. I did this once and I can easily do this again. I am strong and successful enough. There were a lot of things I need to focus on and not these unnecessary feelings.

When I arrived at the company, Kyungsoo was there with Suho and Kai. They were our other friends who helped us with the book. Suho is in marketing and Kai is in accounting.

"Welcome back~ it's time for our celebration!!" Kai cheered as he raised the glass of beer. Suho followed while Kyungsoo looked at me. I nervously smiled while he frowns.

The thing about having Kyungsoo as a friend was that he didn't need words to know what I was feeling. He just needed to look at me and he knew everything was a mess.

As Suho and Kai enjoyed themselves drinking and enjoying the music, I turned to Kyungsoo who still kept his serious and scary aura.

"Hey.." I suddenly said with a playful tone. I nudged his shoulder to get his attention.

"Don't hey me. I told you you're not ready for this. Did you say anything stupid?" He didn't even bother to look at me but I knew if looks could kill, I'd probably die right there and then.

"Hmm well, no. But I did leave him out of the blue" I answered with a proud tone. I wasn't sure if I could say anything that would make him believe that I didn't fucked up the whole meeting but I still have to try something.

Kyungsoo chuckled and turned to me, "You what?"

"Don't laugh. It was unprofessional. I know he's just trying to ease the tension but I was offended when he said I need to make a book 2 and that it's fine with him whatever I write since our relationship was in the past" I replied and crossed my arms. Thinking about it made my blood boil again and I shouldn't feel this way. I am a grown man.

Kyungsoo's smile disappeared. "But he's right"

I turned to him and saw his expression. It was softer, more like concerned rather than angry. "I know., it's just... I know I still can't move on. And him treating me as if nothing happened hurts me"

Lying to Kyungsoo wasn't worth it. I need to tell him everything otherwise I might do something stupid again.

"Why can't you move on? I read your book, I understand that he's awesome but he left" Suho suddenly asked as if they were just listening to us all along.

I sighed and looked at the beer cup in my hand. "Maybe because I still don't know why. I don't know what I did for him to change his mind"

"Is knowing the truth gonna change everything?" Kai asked this time. Kyungsoo looked at me while Suho anticipated my answer. Suddenly, everyone's attention was on me and not the successful partnership.

"Yes. So I wouldn't make the same mistake again."