Boy Trouble|BFM|

epilogue!

Two days later
Annabelle's POV
I still can't believe it, Ashley was really gone, I felt like a huge part of me was gone, I can still remember the night it happened, walking in to meet my parents over her with Ashley lying on the couch, her wrist slit multiple times, I just can't picture how it happened, she left a note saying and I quote.
"I can't go on any more, I was going through a lot, and I couldn't take it. To dad, sorry I wasn't up to your standards, to mom, sorry for leaving so soon,I know we talked about it yesterday, but I knew I couldn't handle it, just a mere sight of the child would hurt me. To Daniel, I still love you, sorry but I couldn't just take the shame I was getting, the insults my sister was giving me, all I ever did was disappoint her and my family and, I wasn't ready to face you all anymore, to all my friends, I'll miss you all. I hope you get why I did it, this wasn't it all but someday you'll know why i did it."
I felt so sad after reading that, I never saw her like that, and I never meant to make her feel that was. this was just the beginning and she had to cut herself off this early.

I was told that my parents were in the room talking, when they heard one of the workers scream, she was too late too, on reaching the scene she was already gone, she went out that morning to clear her head but I guess it didn't work out, she came back hours later with a pack of razors and did it silently, our couch had to be burnt cause of the stains, and even the memory wasn't helping, everyone felt it for her.

Today was her funeral, we just left the church and now, we're at home I plan on going to see her later, but right now everyone is just down. I look around and I see Patricia, susan and jade, the last time I saw them was at graduation, Daniel wasn't even able to hold himself, I can remember the night it happened, Jason called him and told him and he almost fainted at the scene, Alex and maddie were together too with their parents, basically everyone was here, my step mom was still in shock, even I will her first and only daughter, she never even got to see David's first birthday, this was a very big decision and I don't know why she went down this road, we could have fix this, I was never there for her and I let my drama get to it, I really messed up.

"Hey you." maddie walks up to me still teary too "how you doing?" She askes me.

"Surviving," I tried to lighten up, but I knew I was lying to myself "I was thinking of going to her grave later." I added.

"That'll be good, am sure your parents would too." she tapped me on the back before going.

Everyone kept avoiding the topic, no one wanted to talk about her, her death came to us really hard in the chest, and the worst part was that it was suicide, it still hurts.

*****
After the reception was over, everyone left, and it was just us in this empty house, my mom came to spend the night with us, in case anything happens, I've been through a lot they say and are afraid I might lose it. I went to my dad and told him I'll be going now, I needed closure and to talk to her.

I kept driving in circles, taking my time to go there, I didn't want to part of me, but I also knew I needed to, catching my breath I finally got down from the car and made my way to her grave, her tombstone wasn't ready yet, but I knew the spot, a temporary one was fixed for the time being, and they promise it'll be ready soon, I just really hope so. On the inscription it says, "ASHLEY JACKSON 2000 - 2019
GONE TOO SOON" I sat there crying my heart out the moment I saw it.

"Am really sorry Ashley, I should have known, I saw the signs but I ignored it, I was selfish and I let you go, I made you say all this and I was being a bitch, I just hope you find it in your heart to forgive me." I finish off still sitting there before being cut off by a voice.

'Don't blame yourself, we all didn't know," I turn to Daniel and my friends behind me " Maddie said you'd need company." they smiled at me.

"Thanks guys, am really sorry, I've been a bitch to you all honestly I let my drama cause all this," I let out.