Dead Flower (Sequel to The Flower Girl Book Two)

Chapter 55: In Between Heaven and Hell

Veronica

So much regret. I shouldn't have left Andrew in there alone. He needed me, but I'm relieved Flower wasn't in there to hear the awful truth. He never catches a break. I've been sitting on the sofa waiting for him to finally come out of the bathroom. It feels like he's been in there for hours.

I want to check on him, but I'm afraid he'll snap. He asked for space, and I want to respect him. If only there was a way for me to take away his pain. Somehow, we'll just have to deal with it together. A loud thud from the bathroom overpowers the tv show I was currently watching.

Rushing to my feet, I race to the locked bathroom door. I use my nail again to open the door. I'll leave him be as soon as I know he's okay. "Andrew?" The floor is flooded with bloody bath water.  "Baby!" I grab towels from the rack, rushing to his side.

Wan, ghostly, as blood covers his entire body. "Oh Andrew!" I drain the bath water, wanting to find where it's coming from so I can stop the flow. I lift his arm, and see the deep cuts that cover his tattoos. Applying pressure to the wounds, I then run to call the police.

When the conversation is over, we await for their arrival. Why didn't he talk to me? Wait, I can't say anything. I've attempted it many times as well. "Andrew, listen to me!" I hold the towel around his arm as I wash his bloody skin with clean water. "This baby, needs you! Stay with me! You're loved Andrew. I love you, Flower loves you so much! And I know this baby will love you instantly."

I don't know how these words are escaping, but it's instinctual that I keep him alive. "Remember when I joked about you drugging my hot chocolate. I laugh and you were pissed at me, because you thought that was disgusting? Or when you saved me when I went for a walk with the dogs? I was almost raped in that alley, but you protected me. The gas station incident, when that man tried to kidnap me. You've save me so many time Andrew! You're not a monster. Baby you're wonderful."

I kiss his closed eyelids. "You're my savior. You saved me from Derrick. I can't lose you. You've saved me so many god damn times. I don't care if you hate me Andrew, it's my turn. I'm saving you."

                                        <\3

Usually it's me in that bed with the beeping machines and tube in my skin. Of course I'd rather it be me than the ones I love. He seems so at peace as he sleeps. The wrinkles are at rest. Dark circles have found the light. I haven't left him. Not in the Ambulance, or when we got here. I'm going no where. They couldn't pay me enough.

I rock Flower on the chair next to the bed. "Hush little baby don't you cry, everything's gonna be alright." Patting her hair, calming her, well I think I'm trying to calm us both. "Try to get some rest baby."

"What's wrong with daddy?" I haven't been able to come up with a solid lie. I just keep reminding her that he's okay.

"He's hurt hunny. People come to the hospital when they aren't feeling well. They'll get him all fixed up, okay?" Am I trying to convince her or myself? Both. After the overwhelming amount of people in this room, I think he's finally alright. He reminds me of me. Arms are all stitched up.

I can't help but blame myself. I should have never left him when he told me to. I saw how much he was hurting. I failed him. Failed him as a girlfriend, a friend, and as the mother of our child. Speaking of child, Flower lulls to sleep in my arms. I'm tired, but I don't want to sleep. I'm afraid if I do, he might wake up and hyperventilate.

Allowing her to rest in the chair alone, I sit on my knees adjacent to Andrew. The sweatpants wrapped around my skin collects the mild dust. Taking his hand in mine, it's time to express how I honestly feel. "You're much more than a ray of sunshine, or a beautiful walk on the beach with the perfect amount of breeze." I take a moment to pause before my voice cracks.