Save me from myself

Je Promet

Music added.

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They chose a table at the terrace Ronnie helping her with the stroller. Ronnie had observed her when they placed the order. She seemed to put on a good show. He knew that, he saw that.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yes. No." she said.

"You're mad at me, aren't you?" he said rolling his eyes, thinking he managed to fuck it up again.

"No, I'm not mad. Ronnie, I'm confused." she said "One moment I was talking and the next moment you're fuming."

"You did nothing wrong." he said "I just remembered things that have cut me deep."
"Oh.." she said "Wanna talk about it?"

"I prefer not to." he said emotionless.

"Right" she said disappointed.

"Sam.." he started when she said "I see you have so much going on in your mind. I just wish you'd open up to me." Ronnie nodded.

"I need to get my shit straight before I do that." he said.

"Promise me you'll come to me." she said.

"We're making promises now?" he chuckled and thanked the waitress for their food.

"I guess we are." she took the utensils and gave Ronnie his.

"Thanks." he said taking them and took his glass, looking into her eyes "I promise." His voice was reassuring and deep, his stare poring through her, making her blush. She felt like she was entitled to be the first he'd come for when in need. He appreciated that she was willing to wait.

They smiled and started to eat their lunch. After some bites Willow started to fuss and both of their attention was on her. After a moment she took her and sat down to eat again.

"Give her to me, so you can eat properly." Ronnie said smiling.

"It's alright, I'm used to do things with one hand." she said.

"But you don't have to. I'm here." he said admiring Willow.

"I guess I don't." she said smiling and stood up, giving Willow to him "Go to daddy."

She sat back down and resumed eating, looking at them. Admiring the state Ronnie went when Willow was around. She would have kept staring but at one moment Ronnie raised his head and questioned her staring. She blushed and brushed it away. Ronnie bit his lip. The knowing of her staring him made him happy dance in his mind. He kissed her daughters forehead.

They talked freely about things while eating. About the upcoming doctors appointment, what things he needed to do before the tour, about the tour itself, the interviews, about the reactions he got to posting his picture with Willow sleeping on his bare chest. She talked about Willow, what she's used to and how she acts in certain situations. He watched her laughing and enjoying herself. He made a promise in his mind, that he'd do anything to see her happy.

After lunch they started to walk back to his car, Sam pushing the stroller, Ronnie walking with Willow in his arms. He felt proud and happy at that moment.

There were moments when he just listened to Sam talking, noticing the little details, memorizing things. Everything seemed so simple when he was with them, natural, like it was meant to be from the beginning of time. Everything was easier because he was sober, clean. Of course, he was looking forward for the tour, meeting fans, going to new places but this happy feeling was shadowed by the thought of leaving Sam and their daughter behind. He looked at Willow again and then smiled at Sam, seeing her looking at him. Which was often and he couldn't help but to feel excited about that evolving relationship. He had never had such relationship where he would take time to get to know the person. He would get in her pants as soon as possible and then hook up occasionally. But Sam, now that he was sober, was something else. He didn't want to flip the bird to the first fight or misunderstanding. He didn't want to walk away or avoid her. On the contrary, he had been reappearing on her doorstep over and over again. At his lowest and also at his best, he had turned to her first.

He glanced at Sam again, wondering, what was going on in her mind. She looked content, relaxed, enjoying the walk. He wondered if she was always feeling like that or was she feeling this way with him. What ever the reason was, he was glad to see her like that.

They reached back to his car. He put Willow back in her seat and helped Sam to gather the stroller. They were close, while she showed the right way. He felt the closeness get to him, her body scent only adding up.

She also felt it, it was there. But on the other hand, she hadn't felt close with someone in ages. This could be just one of my needs, she thought looking at him at the moment when he wasn't. She gazed over his beautiful lips, to his t-shirt, imagining his tattooed body underneath. Then she looked at his tattooed arms and hands, admitting that he indeed had worked out.

"All done." he said and stood straight "Like that?" he was looking at her.

"Yeah." she came out of her thoughts, blushing. He saw that, frowning and wondering what made her blush.

"Let me put it in the trunk." he said and lifted it up, displaying his biceps. She looked at him, her mouth agape but then cleared her voice and said "Thanks." walking to the passengers side and sat in his car.

He sat in, giving her a smile and ignited the engine.

"Where to?" she asked curious.

"You wanted to go to the mall?" he asked, glancing at her.

"Yeah, um..." she didn't expect him want to go.

"Then we go to the mall." he said and added speed.

They went to a mall close to her home and walked around for hours, talking about random things, fooling around, him making her laugh. They also bought groceries and things Willow needed, him putting all kind of things in the cart while Sam took them out, saying "Ronnieee, she's a baby, she doesn't need all that stuff."

"SO! She'll need it eventually." he said cocky and put it back in the cart, seeing Sam rolling her eyes.

They packed all the things in the car and he started to drive back to her place. She often glanced at him, seeing him in thoughts, his one hand on the wheel, other leaned against the door, his thumb brushing his chin.

"I had fun today." she said, hoping to pull him out of whatever he was thinking.

He snapped his head towards her and chuckled "Yeah, me too." he glanced at Willow on the back seat and said "I think she did too." She looked at her too, saying sweet "Yeah, she did." She looked at him, appreciating him for a moment. As soon as he turned his head to look at her, she sat back straight.