Beyond the Flashing Lights

Chapter 11

Adam POV

I knew today was the anniversary death of Bethany. 2 years. 2 years that Kami had been missing her best friend. It makes me feel sick to my stomach to remember the night she told me about Bethany and the amount of guilt Kami carried for so long.

I hope with everything I have that she has let some of the guilt go.

It takes me a whole fucking hour to get the balls to send her a text message first. Usually I wait for her to text me so I can give her space but today I wanted her to know I was thinking of her.

I don't expect a text back, the point is for her to know I'm here. I'll always be here.

A few hours later.

Thanks Adam. It means a lot.
-Kami

I want to ask her how she is today but I don't want to press her too much. I wait 10 minutes and I can't take it anymore.

I know this is a dumb question... but how are you?

I wait and hope for a reply.

Not a dumb question. I'm okay... considering. I'm back home. Becca is with me. We are visiting my dad before we head out.

It makes me smile like a freaking kid that she replies but also that Becca is with her. Kami deserves a friend like her. And selfishly I know Becca has always supported our relationship.

I wonder if I should tell her I'm leaving tomorrow for Texas... will it matter to her? Will it make her feel like I'm giving up on her? That's it. I don't want any secrets. I don't want her to find out from someone else... I want...

I'm not sure if it matters or not. But Rebecca and I are leaving for New York tomorrow. We are finishing school there. I just thought I should tell you.....

Fuck. My heart breaks all over again. I feel like I'm losing her all over again and yet she was barely mine. These last 7 months I've had hope. If I gave her enough space and time like she wanted she would give me another chance. Even though I didn't deserve another chance.

Space and time. Now we will be even further from each other. How the hell... this really is it..

I'm so happy for you Kami. The big city. Wow. I hope everything you want in life finds it's way to you. You deserve it all. Your talent is unlike anything I've seen and you will accomplish anything you set out to do. I will always cheer you on from afar.... from Texas.

I take a deep breathe and hit send. I mean every word I send to her. She really is an incredible person with extraordinary talent. But I see now, my place in her life is on the sidelines, quietly cheering her on. Always.
—
Kami POV

I will always cheer you on from afar...from Texas.

Adam's last text message stings in a way I wasn't expecting. He is going back to Texas and I can only assume that means Amanda. I guess I shouldn't be surprised. That was the plan his family made for him.

I shouldn't have expected him to sit around and wait on me. I mean we've barely spoken for 7 months. Why does it fucking set me on fire the thought of him going back to her? And just like that I feel it. I feel what I tucked away months ago. I never stopped loving him. If anything being apart from him made me love him more. In a small capacity I understood his poor choice in keeping Amanda from me because of his crazy family.

It doesn't matter now. He's going home. And tomorrow morning I go to New York.

AN:
Timing is everything.
Adam is going Texas and Kami is headed to NYC.
What is next for these two?