Pumanhik na ako sa loob ng aking kwarto at naabutan doon si Aiden na nakanguso habang nakaupo sa aking kama. Nakapagpalit na rin Siya ng kaniyang damit. Lumapit ako sa kaniya at tinanong kung bakit ganiyan ang kaniyang itsyura Ngayon.
"What's wrong baby?" I sit next to him and played with his hair.
He told me that he likes it. He wants me to play his hair instead of tapping his butt when he was a kid. He close his eyes and lean on me. I smile.
"Ang tagal mo po, mommy... Naantok pa si Aiden." Nakangusong sumbong Niya sa akin.
Natawa ako ng mahina dahil doon. Ang anak ko ay naglalambing sa akin. May gusto siguro siyang hilingin sa akin. Also, pumayag na rin akong Dito na mismo manatili dahil sa malaking opportunity na natanggap ako sa trabaho. Malaki ang sahod Nila doon at kailangan na ring mag aral ni Aiden.
Kahit nandito pa ang aking mga magulang para tumulong sa gastusin sa aking anak ay hindi ko pwedeng iasa sa kanila iyon. Ako ang kaniyang ina mismo ang magbibigay niyon sa kaniya. Kahit Anong trabaho basta kapag humiling ang aking anak ay maibigay ko kahit papaano. I am working hard for Aiden's future.
"Mommy is sorry baby... I just talk to your grandmother in the kitchen and tell her to bake your favorite, cookies."
Parang kailan lang ay kalong kalong ko pa Siya sa aking mga bisig dahil sa sobrang liit Ngayon ay malaki na siya. Parang ayaw ko pa siyang lumaki. Ang bilis ng panahon at malaki na siya. Parang ineenjoy ko pa lamang ang kaniyang pagkabata at buhat buhat ko pa Siya noon pero Ngayon ay malaki na Siya. Anytime soon, maghahanap na Siya sa akin about sa kaniyang ama.
Hindi pa ako handa para sagutin ang katanungan niyang iyon. I don't want to hurt Aiden. Pero Ngayon at narito na kami mismo sa pilipinas ay hindi malabong magtagpo ang aming mga landas. Alam kung balang araw ay hahanapin ni Aiden sa akin ang kaniyang ama at kung bakit hindi Namin Siya kasama. Balang araw ay magkikita sila pero natatakot ako.
Hanggang Ngayon ay natatakot pa rin akong mawala Siya. His my treasure. If Mike found out that we are already here in the Philippines. I know, he would take him away from me.
"Really? Can I go outside, mommy?" My son excitedly asked when he heard his favorite cookies.
I nodded and smile. I put him down and watch him close the door. Now that I am alone here. My room is still the same as I left before. Walang nagbago at malinis pa rin hanggang Ngayon. Napabuntong hininga ako ng mapansin ko ang nag iisang larawan ko noong bata pa lamang ako. Kalong kalong ako ng aking ama habang ang aking ina ay nakahilig ang kaniyang ulo sa balikat ni daddy.
I smile and lay down on my soft bed. I miss my old room and so the bed here. Nakatulog ako ng matiwasay at hindi ako namahay. Because I am longing for my warm and soft bed. The familiar of the place inside my room and the sweet scent that I used to spray on my body when I was in my teenager stage.
Now that I already have a son. Everything was change. But not all. Nagising ako dahil sa sunod sunod na tawa at hagikgik sa aking tabi. I slowly open my eyes and I saw my prince. He was giggling while kissing my cheeks to wake me up. I chuckle and hug him so tight.
"Good evening, Mommy! Wake up please? I'm hungry. We are waiting for you before we start eating our dinner."
Tumango ako sa kaniya at napansin na alas otso na ng gabi. Napahaba ang aking tulog. Nag inat ako at tumayo na. Inayos ko ang magulo kung kama. Aiden immediately leave the room when he saw me awake. I look at myselft and realize that I didn't change my clothes. I sigh and look at my closet. My old clothes are still here.
I thought it would fit on me but I smile widely when it did. Kahit siguro ay palagi kung makita ang malaking sugat sa aking tiyan ay hindi ko iyon ikakahiya kanino man. Aiden left it here on my stomach.
This is the most precious and beautiful scar that I have... Because of my son.
I look at the mirror. I can't believe that my teenager clothes are still fit on my body. Para lamang akong nagbakasyon sa Ibang bansa sa aking suot at hindi mabakasang nakapangak. Umiling ako at natawa sa aking sarili. The curve on my body is now showing because of the fitted sleeveless shirt and a maong short. Para akong bumalik sa pagkabata.
More on ang mga dala ko sa aking maleta ay purong dress ang mga iyon. Dahil inaasahan ko talagang may damit pa akong babalikan rito sa pilipinas. Bumaba na ako pagkatapos. My son immediately glared at me when he saw me. I rolled my eyes on him.
"You look like a teenager with your clothes, Lau. You didn't change even if you have already a son."
Komento ni mommy at inaya akong maupo na para saluhan sila. I obligated and put some foods on my plates. My son is busy eating his favorite. Hindi man lang Siya nagsasawa. Sinuway ko Siya at sinabing Kumain muna ng kanin but mom said he already eat.
"Your son looks so mad, Lau..." I heard my dad chuckle.
My son are sitting on my dad's lap. Manang told us that they are both done with their dinner. Nauna na raw silang Kumain dahil hinihintay pa raw Nila ako ni mommy na magising bago Kumain.
"Just like you dad when I was on my teenager stage." Dad just laugh on my remarks.
My son still giving me a death glare that I ignore. My son is too possessive. He think that I can't wear those clothes who's seeing on new york. He always see me wearing a dress and a jeans but now that we are here in the Philippines, the temperature are too hot, I can't wear the clothes I am wearing on new york.
Masama ang loob na kumakain ng cookies si Aiden. Hindi mawala wala ang kaniyang masamang tingin hanggang sa matapos Kaming kumain. Napakamot na lamang ako sa aking batok dahil kahit tapos na Kaming Kumain ay masama pa rin ang kaniyang tingin sa akin. We are now here on my room.
"Aiden?" I call him.
Lumapit Siya sa akin ng nakanguso habang masama pa rin ang kaniyang tingin sa akin. I raise one of my eyebrows on him. Hindi Naman kinulang sa tela ang mga suot kong damit although it can show too much skin in it. My son lay on my bed and put his blanket.
"What's wrong baby?" I sweetly asked him.
Tumabi ako sa kaniya at niyakap Siya ng naglalambing. Kahit Anong gawin kung mainis sa kaniya ay sa huli ako Naman palagi ang natatalo. Hindi ko Siya matiis lalo na kapag alam kung Galit at nagtatampo Siya sa akin.
"Wala po..." I saw how he close his eyes and ignore me.
Ngumuso ako. "Tell me," I whispered and kiss his cheeks.
"Kasi Naman po mommy eh!" Naiinis na umupo Siya at nakangusong humarap sa akin.
Tumawa ako ng mahina. Umiling ako sa kaniyang nagiging reaction. Ang moody Niya at alam ko rin kung Saan Siya nagmana. Jeez, why I am always thinking of him again? Simula ng makabalik ako rito sa pilipinas ay walang oras na hindi Siya pumasok sa aking isip.
"What is it baby? Tell me..." I smile sweetly.
Humiga Siya at niyakap ako. His head are now resting on my chest. I play his hair so he can go back to sleep. Alam kung kulang Siya sa tulog dahil mas inunang maglaro at Kumain ng paborito niyang pagkain.
"What are you wearing, mommy? Your skin are showing. There are so many lion that wants to eat you if you go outside while wearing that."
I chuckle when I hear him explaining his side. Hindi Naman gaanong kaikli ang aking suot at nagpapakita ng kahit na ano. It still decent but my son think that someone will take advantage on me.
"Mommy is aware, baby." I said and started to sing a song.
It's already ten in the evening. Kailangan na niyang matulog dahil malalim na ang gabi. Alam ko rin na pagod pa ang aking anak dahil sa byahe at kulang niyang tulog sa sobrang excited na makarating sa pilipinas. Nagpapasalamat din ako at hindi Siya nagrereklamo kahit na sobrang init ng temperatura rito sa pinas.
"But be safe always mommy..." My son are too sweet.
I chukle. "I promise my prince..." I kiss his forehead when I saw how sleepy he is.
"Good night, Mommy. I love you." I smile and watch him fall sleep.
"I love you too, baby..." I whispered and put our blanket to cover our body.
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