Would your heart stop ( Jay x Matthew Big Mouth Jatthew Fanfiction )

Welcome Home

Jays pov
___________________________________

I stared at the hospital bands around my slim boney wrists, I couldn't wait till I could cut them off. They just reminded me of all of that pain. Everything I had to endure, all at my own hand of course. When I made the decision to take those pills I didn't think I would wake up so I never thought about recovery. How hard and painful everything would be. The flashbacks of the horrific nights taunting me in my head.

I woke up to see the time was 2:34 am. For some reason that number had stuck with me very clearly. As I rubbed my eyes and let out a yawn I winced in pain. All of my organs had constant sharp, hot pains running through them. The damage the pills had caused was severe. My heart had been permanently damaged and everything else wasn't that great either. I remembered how everyone had just left as I fell asleep. I'd only woken up a few hours prior to that.

My stomach started to turn as I began to burn up. The sweat was practically dripping from my shivering body. I began to gag as I quickly grabbed a bowl from beside me. As I emptied my entire stomach contents, Matthew started to wake up. His eyes widened at the sight of my fragile body creating the most violent and horrifying sounds. He jumped to his feet and started to rub my back in comfort.

"That's it Jay, let it all out." Matthew whispered softly into my ear.

I tried to speak but was silenced by the constant gagging. At this point nothing was even coming up anymore but that didn't stop my throat being ripped to shreds as I dry heaved. My hand was brought to my mouth in attempt to wipe away the sick from my chin. Before I could act Matthew bat away my hand and replaced it with a slightly damp tissue. He looked down at the tissue with horror. A confused expression appeared on my face as I hesitantly looked into the bowl. The room was dim so I flicked on the light next to my hospital bed.

My eyes were met with a thick sticky liquid, it was a dark red colour. None of this was vomit, it was all blood. I paused at the sight before placing the bowl onto the side I found it on. I looked up at Matthew with panic in my eye.

"Don't worry the doctor said this might happen. When you overdose your body doesn't react well and is trying to reject everything. Your organs are damaged so you need to calm whilst I go get a nurse ok?" Matthew was talking softly to calm me down.

I nodded my head slowly in agreement. I didn't want Matthew to even leave the room to go get a nurse. Since I had woken up he hadn't left my side. No one was able to remove him with all of his sassy remarks. It was pointless arguing with him because you knew you were doomed from the start. As he went to leave a sudden wave of this horrible unfamiliar nausea rushed over me. I grabbed his arm tightly as I tried to speak.

"Please don-" I said as my words were no long bearable.

The ability to speak or even move freely had been taken away from me. My body began to shake violently and seize up. I could hear the beeping and screaming of monitors in the background. Matthew started to run to the front desk whilst yelling the whole time.

"Doctor! Nurse! Anybody! I need someone please! Help!" He screamed in order to get anyone in the buildings attention.

"Jay? Earth to Jay." Matthew said as he poked me gently on the cheek.

I snapped back into reality as I realised the car had come to a stop. My head turned up to look at Matthew whilst he unfastened my seat belt and helped me out of the car. I couldn't believe after all this time, I was going home. Not to a crappy house with no food, no warmth and no family. This was a real home. With cooked meals every morning and night, a loving mother and father that would tuck you in every day, that kind of heat that settled throughout the house and safety. You didn't have to worry about hiding spaces and if you would be beaten in this house. Diane mommy and Elliot mommy didn't even raise there voices most of the time. It was a perfect home. It was something I always had wanted. It was now my home...