𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖 • 𝚐𝚕𝚎𝚎

𝚅𝙸𝙸

Nationals was here. It was the final time I would compete with my brother on stage before he went off to join the military. It was the last time I would hear one of his stupid pep talks that always made me feel better. It was the last time that I wouldn't worry about him. The very last time.

I did what I always did when it came to competitions. I sat in the hallway, trying to catch my breath and calm down. I was calmer than usual. Medication will do that to you. Finn came out and stood next to me.

"This is the last time I'm ever gonna get one of these."

"Alright, listen. This is not going to be sad. I am going to be there, whenever you need me. I will only be one call away. Now, what are you so nervous about?"

I sighed and looked down to the floor, playing with my hands. "This is my chance to prove myself. To win us a national championship and...I'm just terrified that I'm gonna screw it up. I'm just scared that if I screw it up, then nobody else is going to talk to me. After you and Lexie and Scarlett all leave, all I'm gonna have is Blaine, Sam, and this stupid glee club. And I can't risk this. I can't risk people hating me because I'm the reason that we lost nationals."

He looked at me. "Do you remember what I said to you the first time I ever gave you one of these? About being afraid." I shook my head. "I said that the only thing my little sister was scared of were spiders and that she was gonna kick some ass when she got up on that stage." I sighed. "You always did have a way with these stupid pep talks. I feel sorry for my future nieces or nephews."

"Wait, what?"

"They have to have you for a dad. And Lexie for a mother. Those children are doomed."

"Well, your kids have to have you for a mother."

"I will be the best mother those kids could ask for, Finn. And to think, I was gonna name my first born son after you. There goes that."

We both laughed for a minute before Lexie came running out from behind the curtain. "Hey, we're on." Finn and I looked at each other for a minute before looking back at Lexie. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm okay." I said in breathy whispers. "Go kick some ass, little sister." I nodded and the two of us walked out.

Rachel--of course--started with her solo. She sang It's All Coming Back to Me Now by Celine Dion. Then, Lexie and Finn went on to do Paradise By the Dashboard Light by Meatloaf (weird name for a band if you ask me, but whatever). Scarlett had a solo in the song, which she absolutely killed, might I add. It wasn't anything different for Scarlett, though. She was amazing at everything she did. Then, the TroubleTones went on to do The Edge of Glory by Lady Gaga. Then, it was finally my turn. Everyone else left the stage and I walked down to the center of the stage.

The music to Titanium started and I just stood there. The entire time I thought in my head You can do this. Just imagine you're in the choir room. Picture Finn, sitting front and center smiling at you. He's the only one out there. And when I opened my eyes from the closed state they were in, that's what I pictured.

That's what got me through the whole performance. Up on that stage...I felt different. I felt...like myself. I was having so much fun. More fun than I normally would. I just kept picturing him, sitting front and center, cheering me on. It helped. Nobody else would have helped during this performance to picture. Maybe...?

No I wasn't ready to go there yet. I hadn't even noticed that the song was over until everyone was clapping. I stood there for a moment before I ran into the wings. They all smiled at me and made me feel proud of myself. They all told me how amazing I did.

Finn, being the Frankenteen he was, was peering over the rest of them. "I did it." I said, pretty much choking up on the happy tears and smiling. "You did it." I smiled even larger. "And I didn't choke."

"And you didn't choke."

**

It was the hardest part of the competitions. The waiting to see who won. I knew, that if we lost, I would never be able to live with myself.

"In second place...Vocal Adrenaline!"

And we all knew what that meant. As Finn and Lexie walked over to grab the trophy, and I just froze. We did it. We won. We were national champions. All I knew was that the tears were coming on. Everyone else was jumping around in excitement. I couldn't do it. I couldn't. Finn stood in front of me, holding Lexie close to his side. "Are you okay, A.J?" I felt like I couldn't breathe. "Please tell me this isn't a dream, Finn. Please tell me we actually won nationals." He nodded and smiled.

"We won, A.J. We won."

I felt all the breath in the world come back to me. I did it. We did it. Everything felt okay in this moment.