𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖 • 𝚐𝚕𝚎𝚎

𝚅

It was the morning after the party. I had slept a little longer than usual. When I came downstairs, Sam was the only one down there. I looked around. "Where is everyone?" He turned around as I stood at the island. "Oh, uh, Blaine went to find Kurt and Artie had some weird school thing. I dunno." 

I sighed as I leant on the counter. He turned around and slid me a plate of bacon. "You made me breakfast?" I asked, as I grabbed the plate. "Would you wanna have kids?" I bit the bacon a little too hard, biting my lip and making it bleed a little. "Well, yeah, eventually. But I'd wanna live a little before I had any." 

"How many would you want?" 

I swallowed a little before speaking again. "One or two. Preferably a boy before a girl. I'd name the first one Finn--I promised him when I was younger that I would name my son after him. His middle name would be your first name. Then, for a girl, it would be Isabella Sophia or Caroline Jane. So, we could call her Izzie or C.J--which both sound badass." 

He looked at me. "My first name would be his middle name?" I nodded. "Well, yeah. I don't think I would want my kids to have anybody's else's DNA. I would want them to have yours. Besides, if they had other DNA, then they wouldn't be able to do cool impressions...or have a smile that light up a room." 

He looked down for a little. "What if we ended up with other people?" I smiled and leant against the counter to get a little closer. "Then we will find our way back to each other. You know how I know that?" He shook his head. "Because you, Samuel Evans, are my soulmate." 

"You believe in soulmates?" 

"I never did before. But that day, in the choir room, when I first heard you sing, I knew I had found my soulmate. I'm not one to believe in many things. But, you, made me believe in soulmates." 

I smiled a little. "Sam, these eggs are gross." We both laughed. "What? What do you mean they're gross?" I pointed down to one of the eggs that sat on the plate. "That one's black. It's burnt." We both continued laughing. 

"Let's go to Dunkin'. Okay? Get some coffee. Some donuts. I will go get dressed and then we can leave." I smiled a little and turned to head upstairs. Before I could even step onto the first step, there was a pounding sound on the door. I made a weird face before I turned to the door. The pounding continued until I opened the door.

Finn stood there, looking worse than ever. "Finn...what-" Before I could even ask my question, he fell into my arms and just cried. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. "What's wrong? Finn, what's wrong?" 

In between his sobs, he said "They're gone. The babies are gone." It was hard to make out, but when I did, my heart sank. "Oh.." And I hugged him harder. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. He was heartbroken. 

Finn had been so excited to be a dad. He was ready. Every time he would come over, he would talk about how excited he was. This...well...this almost made me cry. Very few things made me cry. I didn't want to pull away, but I did need to know something. "Where's Lexie?" In between sobs, he said once more, "At the hospital." I didn't know what to do. I just stood there. I had never seen my brother this heartbroken. 

"Why don't we go to the hospital...to see Lexie?" 

He pulled away and nodded. "Alright, let me throw something on and then we'll go." I turned and ran upstairs quickly. I threw on the first clothes I could find and ran back downstairs. "Are you coming?" I asked Sam as I ran into the kitchen to grab a water bottle. He shook his head. "I'll meet you there later." 

I kissed him on the cheek before running over to Finn and out the door. I ran outside and into the car. Finn followed loosely behind, but got in the car a few moments after I did. He had loose sobs every now and then, making my heart hurt a little more with each little sob. 

"Finn, it's gonna be alright. This happens to people all the time. It's not like your infertile. You just are gonna have to try again. I don't know how you're feeling but, I do know that Lexie feels ten times worse. She probably thinks that this is all her fault and that she made this happen. This isn't anyone's fault. We're gonna go see her now and then this'll all be over in a few days." 

The rest of the ride was quiet. Finn was upset, clearly. When we got to the hospital, he asked the receptionist what room she was in and ran over to the elevator. He wasn't even polite about it. I mouthed an apology to the receptionist and went over to the elevator where he was. 

"I understand that you're upset right now...and going through hell...but manners are still a thing." 

He didn't even look at me. He just kept staring ahead. Lexie's room was the first room on the right when you got off the elevator. He ran right into her room when we got up there. I could hear him whispering apologies as I walked to the room. 

When I got in there, he sat next to her beside and was looking at her. She smiled at him and didn't notice I was in there until I had said something. "How're you feeling, Lex?" She looked over at me. "Hell, but I'm alright." 

I sighed. "This is one of the worse things to ever happen to someone. It has to be. I mean, besides the death of a living one, the death of a fetus has to be worse." She nodded. "I...I had them do every kind of test...to make sure it wasn't my fault. They said it wasn't, which I guess is nice." 

I nodded. "It's not your fault. It's not anybody's. It happens to the best people. The people who deserve a family, that's who it happens to. Just, don't blame yourself. Listen, I'm literally right next door, if you need anything, just come over. Alright? Sam won't mind. Artie isn't home half the time and Blaine is always somewhere with Kurt. Just come over." 

They both nodded. "I have to go...but...you don't have a car. I can get an Uber, if you want me to leave the car here." Finn shook his head. "No, we'll be fine. If it's really necessary, I'll call you. Maybe you and Sam could bring the car here." I nodded. 

"If you need anything, big brother, call me." 

He nodded. I smiled and walked out of the room. I walked down the hallway and out into the car. And for a moment, throughout all the crazy, I remembered what Sam and I were talking about earlier and that made my world a little bit better.