If I Die... (Final Ending to Deadly in Love)

Chapter 22

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Chapter song: Bulletproof Love by Pierce the Viel
(Justin's pov)
-5pm-
I laid awake on the couch bed, my eyes closed but my mind running. What's up with Christie? Is she still mad at me? I hope she can see that I really, truly love her. Why had I married her if I hadn't? There's nothing I could do right now, except keep her from falling deeper into depression. I want to go inside her mind and throw away every problem that's bugging her. Christie turned and tossed in her sleep, mumbling something that I couldn't make out. I sat up and turned to her, admiring every feature. Bags underlined her eyes, and I could see her cheek bones and collar bones very easily. I sighed and brushed my fingers over her cold, pale skin. My eyes locked on the small, red line on her wrist, exposed from her sweater. I gently tugged her sleeve down, exposing more cuts. I swallowed hard and stood up. I decided to step outside for a moment. It was a cloudy day, and it's pretty cold outside too. Of course, I don't think it's that cold, because I'm standing shirtless outside. I pulled out a small pack of cigarettes. I chose to stop trying to get equal with Christie and smoke a cigarette, instead of an illegal drug. I promised Christie that I wouldn't let anything hurt her or Drew. To be honest, they should be dead already. It's just that Jason gets interrupted before he can kill anyone. I smoked until my throat was numb. Suddenly, something flew into the level above me. I heard thumps, then something flew past me into our apartment door. It was a bullet. I dashed into the apartment, ducking the bullets. Christie wasn't in bed nor the kitchen. I quickly grabbed Drew and sat behind the couch. Christie must be in the bathroom. I was right, because Christie walked out with a towel around herself. I motioned her to duck, and she did.
"What's happening?"
She sounded scared, so I took her hand and pulled her close to me. I couldn't hear any more gunshots, so I called Khalil.
"Hey, are you guys ok there, Bieber?"
Khalil picked up.
"Yea, is everyone good?"
I glanced at Christie, noticing a bandage around her wrist. Fuck.
"Yea, I just called Ryan and Za. They're good"
Khalil replied.
"Ok, well, we can't go outside. What do we do?"
I heard Drew start to cry.
"Let's stay put and don't go near the door and windows"
Khalil suggested.
"Ok"
I tried to calm Drew, but he kept sobbing.
"I'll call you soon. I've gotta take care of Kayla"
He hung up before I could say anything else. I put down the phone and sighed. Christie had Drew now, calming him way better than I could. I helped her up and kissed her cheek. I think everything is over, because it's been a quiet 5 minutes.
"Good morning, baby"
I moved a string of her damp hair behind her ear.
"Hi"
She smiled weakly then set Drew inside his chair in the kitchen. I watched as she fed Drew while keeping her towel up. I noticed that she didn't have much energy, and she winced at almost everything. She hasn't eaten. I walked to her and stopped her.
"I'll feed him. Go get dressed"
I ordered nicely then finished feeding Drew. My phone rung, and I answered it.
"Justin, bro, are you ok?"
It was Ryan.
"Yea, how bout you?"
I threw the trash away and gave Drew his bottle.
"Not so good"
Ryan sounded freaked out.
"Why?"
I stood against the counter.
"They tried to break in last night"
Ryan probably hasn't gotten much sleep.
"Damn, are you guys ok, though?"
I saw Christie walk out, looking tired and pale.
"Stacy's a bit paranoid, but no one was hurt"
Ryan explained.
"Damn, I wish I could do something about that piece of crap. He's giving me hell"
I muttered in irritation.
"I know"
He agreed.
"Well, if you see any signs, give me a call"
I motioned Christie to come here.
"Ok, see you"
Ryan sounded exhausted.
"Ok"
I hung up, put the phone down, then took Christie's hand.
"You ok?"
I looked in her tired eyes. She nodded.
"I wish he would leave us alone"
I was about 2 inches away from her.
"Me too"
Her voice was sore.
"You need to eat something"
I fragilely held her waist, feeling nothing but bones. Christie shook her head.
"Yes, Christie, you're scaring me. Please, something to last you for today"
I pleaded her. Christie ate 4 grapes then sat on the couch. Ok, something's really wrong with her. She's been acting way too distant.
"Christie, please. Help me out here, baby. I don't wanna have to worry about you every second"
I could feel tears starting up in my eyes.
"Justin, no-"
"Then tell me what's bothering you right now"
My voice was wobbly.
"...I just hate myself so much"
She started to cry in her sleeves.
"Don't. You know I love you. Why does my opinion not count?"
I pulled her closer.
"It does. But if I told you the truth, you'll get mad at me"
She cried harder.
"Christie, I promise. I promise I won't get mad. I fucking swear that I won't get mad at you"
I told her honestly. She sighed then bit her lip, sniffling and shedding tears.
"Yesterday, I asked you about your hoodie...because your ex had it. She told me you gave it to her. I wasn't sure if she was lying or not, because you always had it with you. Then...she showed me voicemail that you sent her. It was your voice"
Christie explained. I was angry, but I know that Jason was probably behind all this.
"I'm gonna kill him"
Was all I said.
"Are you mad?"
Christie seemed nervous.
"No, Christie. Do you believe that?"
I studied her, looking for any signs of dishonesty. She hesitated, her eyes scanning the floor before they locked with mine.
"Should I?"
Her lips were dry, and they went miserably perfect with her soft, gravelly voice. I thought about how I hit her and made her feel terrible about herself.
"No..."
I shook my head guiltily. Christie looked at me a bit longer before she looked away.
"...But I never cheated on you. I've said and done things that I regret, but you shouldn't believe them"
I cupped her face in my hands.
"Ok"
She sniffled and hugged me.
"I need to get more food for Drew. I want you to stay here, ok?"
I dried her face and kissed her cheek.
"You'll be safe?"
She mumbled, her eyes concerned.
"Yea, it's just across the street. It'll only take 15 minutes"
I tried to convince her that I'll be ok. She nodded again then held Drew in her arms. I grabbed my grey hoodie, put on a black beanie, then walked out, locking the door on my way out. I had to walk since I left my fucking car, which is probably taken away by now. I entered a small Walmart and searched for baby food. I grabbed 8, so I don't have to go the store again as soon. I got some snacks then paid. I watched for anything suspicious as I made my way back. Unexpectedly, a shock of pain was felt at the back of my head. I couldn't say or do anything before everything was pitch black.

(A/N: I'm so proud of Justin. He sat there and listened to all the jokes about him, and it makes me so proud)

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