Statehouse Superhero/Villain AU Incorrect Quotes

358 12 3
                                    

Utah: Honey? Where's my super suit?

Ilithiya: What?

Utah: Where - is - my - super - suit?

Ilithiya: I, uh, put it away.

Utah: Where?

Ilithiya: Why do you need to know?

Utah: I need it!

Ilithiya: Uh-uh! Don't you think about running off doing no derrin'-do. We've been planning this dinner for two months!

Utah: The public is in danger!

Ilithiya: My evening's in danger!

Utah: You tell me where my suit is, woman! We are talking about the greater good!

Ilithiya: 'Greater good?' I am your wife! I'm the greatest good you are ever gonna get!

~~~~~~~~~~

Nevada: I have an army.

Maryland: We have Florida.

Florida: [jumps through the window with two katanas] We also have the pOWER OF FRIENDSHIP BItch!

~~~~~~~~~~

Florida, on the phone: I don't speak Cantonese, but I did take eighth grade Spanish, so ¿donde está la biblioteca? Which literally translates to, I don't bargain pumpkin fucker.

~~~~~~~~~~

DC: As you can see, you've fallen right into my trap!

Maryland: You can't trap justice. It's an idea, a belief!

DC: But even the most heartfelt belief can be corroded over time!

Maryland: Justice is a non-corrosive metal.

DC: But metals can be melted, by the heat of revange!

Maryland: It's revenge, and it's best served cold!

DC: It can be easily reheated in the Microwave of Evil!

Maryland: Well I think your warranty is about to expire!

DC: Maybe I have an extended warranty!

Maryland: Warranties are invalid if you don't use the produce for its intended purpose!

New York: Ugh, girls, girls, you're both pretty! Can I go home now?

~~~~~~~~~~

Georgia: See not winging it, isn't what they do.

Utah: What exactly is it that they do?

Florida: Kick names, take ass.

Louisiana: Yeah, that's right.

~~~~~~~~~~

Maryland: Please tell me nobody kissed me.

Utah: We won.

Maryland: Alright. Hey. Alright. Good job, guys. Let's just not come in tomorrow. Let's just take a day. There's a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don't know what it is, but I wanna try it.

California: We're not finished yet.

Maryland: And then shawarma after?

Ben Brainard State Headcanons, One-shots, and moreWhere stories live. Discover now