Florida: What time is it?
Louisiana: Pass me the saxophone and I'll find out.
Louisiana: [plays tune from the Seal playing saxophone vine]
New York: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT 2AM?!
Louisiana: It's 2am.
~~~~~~~~~
California: I have no friends.
New York: Bitch, what am I? A roach?
~~~~~~~~~
Utah: In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost.
Florida: Head, shoulders, knees, and toes. Turn up your nose, strike that pose, HeY Macarena!
~~~~~~~~~~
Texas: Witches aren't real.
Louisiana: I will hex you.
Texas: I take it back. I'm sorry.
~~~~~~~~~~
Florida: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
Louisiana: How am I supposed to know?
Georgia: You say, as if we don't use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Louisiana: [sighs]
Louisiana: You wouldn't be trapped.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Florida: [bursts in to Louie's room angry and on the verge of tears]
Louisiana: Who am I hexing now?
~~~~~~~~~~~
DC: Where's Florida?
California: New York locked them in the bathroom.
New York: California! You weren't supposed to tell him!
DC: I'm cool with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
New York: Son of a-
Utah: Watch you're language.
New York: Fun.
Utah: You're close.
New York: Frick.
Utah: Don't test me.
New York: Shoot dang it.
Utah: Oh my gosh.
New York: [whispering] Ass.
Utah: [gasps]
~~~~~~~~~~
South Carolina: [whispering] You better get your ass out this bed.
Georgia: [also whispering] You better get your ass out my room.
~~~~~~~~~~
New York: Bruh!
Massachusetts: What?
New York: I know you ate my Chinese food!
Massachusetts: I did not eat your Chinese food.
New York: Yes you did because I have 6 pieces of honey chicken, 2 egg rolls and 5286 grains of rice!
Massachusetts: Who the hell counts the rice?!
~~~~~~~~~~
California: 5 reasons why my standards are too high.
California: [points at Texas] 1 [points at New York] 2 [points at Washington] 3 [points at Nevada] 4 [points at Louisiana] 5
~~~~~~~~~~
Massachusetts: [walks in pissed off]
Connecticut: I'm watch my tone danana I ain't talking back, no. Why? Cuz I'mma get thrown danana
~~~~~~~~~~~
Florida: I'm going with Louie to Phoenix.
Louisiana: No, Florida, you can't go to Pho-enix with me, it's in Arizona.
Florida: Oh yeah.
DC: Why can't you go to Arizona?
Florida: Let's just say there might me a warrant there for my arrest. And in Ohio and some other states I can never remember.
Louisiana: Well you just have to learn the song I made up for you.
Louisiana: [singing] What are the states that Florida can't go? Arizona, Utah, and Ohio.
DC: Oh my.
Louisiana: [singing] There's three more states that Florida can't be. Texas, New Hampshire, and Tennessee.
Florida: [singing] I'm also not welcome is Europe.
YOU ARE READING
Ben Brainard State Headcanons, One-shots, and more
FanficI do ships, I have another book that is just x reader. For you Ben Brainard Fans. Enjoy! Feel free to request
