Ben Brainard State Headcanons, One-shots, and more

Is That My Skirt? ~ Florsiana

Louisiana walks into the living room wearing a long black skirt, that goes just past his knees, that he stole from Hawaii a day prior, a black long jacket with fluff on the edges, and his Mardi Gras beads. "Hey, Kentucky, can't I borrow your cigarette lighter? I lost mine?" Louie asks and pulls a box of cigarettes out of jacket pocket.

"Sure." Kentucky responds and pulls his lighter out of his pocket and tosses it to Louisiana.

DC walks through the living room, "No smoking in the house." He says as he walks by.

Hawaii and Alaska walk into the living room holding hands. Hawaii looks at Louie with a confused look, "Is that my skirt?"

"What? Oh, yeah, this. I found it in your room. It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathey on the bits." Louie responds.

"Why are you wearing a skirt anyway? Skirts are for girls. You're a disgrace." Texas says.

Louie pulls out his phone, "Hey, Siri?"

"Hello, Louisiana." Siri replies.

"Yes, hi, honey, when did I ask for Texas' opinion?" Louisiana asks.

"I do not recall you asking anyone for their opinion."

"See, there ya go." Louie says and drops his phone back in his pocket, "If you have a problem with me ya best get over it. You'll make you're miserable waiting for me to give a shit."

"That's on periodt." Hawaii says, "You know what? You can keep the skirt."

"Yeah, I was going to anyway." Louie responds. "I've never seen you wear it, so I'm keeping it."

"Yeah, you do that."

"Skirts are still made for girls," Texas says.

"Technically, skirts and dress were originally made for guys so that their... parts could breath, while pants were made for women because-"

"Shut up, California." Texas interrupts Cali.

"Rude." California says and walks away.

Texas turns to Louie, "You shouldn't b-"

"I don't give a shit about what you think of me," Louisiana cuts him off. Louie flips Texas off, "So just fuck off." He walks towards the door, he steps out sits on the porch steps with his legs crossed. Louisiana opens his box of cigarettes and takes one out before putting the box back in his pocket.

Louie lights the cigarette, he takes it out of his mouth and breathes the smoke out. The door opens and shuts, Louisiana hears footsteps walking towards him. Florida sits down next to him.

"Babe, I thought you quit?" His boyfriend asks with a little bit of anger in his voice.

"I did, then I found out," Louie takes another puff of the cigarette, "Smoking is my coping mechanism."

"I thought drinking was your coping mechanism?"

"It is, they both are," Louie breathes out more smoke.

Florida grabs the cigarette out of his hand, "Give me that." Florida puts the cigarette out.

Louie takes the box of cigarettes out of his pocket.

"That too," Florida grabs the pack of cigarettes out of Louisiana's hand.

Louie sighs and stands up, he grabs the box back out of Florida's hand and bolts.

Florida jumps up and runs after him, as soon as he gets to the door, it gets slammed in his face. He opens the door and shuts it behind him before running down the hall after Louisiana.

Before Louie can shut his bedroom door, Florida catches the door. "Louie, you need to stop smoking!"

"I only smoke when I'm stressed or annoyed."

"You need to find a better away to cope." Florida holds out his hand, "Now give me the pack."

"No."

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Louisiana, I care about you, now give me the pack."

"No, if you cared about me, you would let me have my coping mechanism!"

"I don't want you to ruin your lungs."

"Like drinking is any better for me."

"Well, I don't want you to not be able breathe." Florida extends his arm, "Now give me the pack."

"No."

"Yes!" Florida tackles him into his bed and grabs the pack of cigarettes.

"Give them back!" Louie yells and tries to get the pack back. They end up on the floor, Florida manages to keep the pack away from him. "Fine, I'mma go make myself a daiquiri." Louie pushed boyfriend off of him. He grabs his empty cup off of his dresser. Florida stands up, Louie snatches the box back out of his hand and drops it in his pocket and runs.

"Louisiana!" Florida yells and runs after Louie.

Louie runs into the kitchen, he opens his liquor cabinet. He starts making himself a drink. Florida runs into the room.

"I thought tha-"

"That I was gonna go outside?" Louisiana interrupts him. "I'm making myself a daiquiri, you want something?"

Florida sits down at the island, "Yeah, sure, I'll take a Whiteclaw."

"Get it yourself," Louie responds.

"But you asked if I wanted something."

"Yeah, I asked you wanted something, I never said I'd get it for you."

When Louie is done making his drink he goes back outside. He sits down on the porch steps, he puts his daiquiri on the ground and pulls out his cigarettes. Louie picks one and puts it in his mouth before lighting it. He takes it out of his mouth and blows the smoke out.

Florida walks out the door, closing it behind him. He sits on his knees behind Louisiana and wraps his arms around his waist and tests his chin on Louie's shoulder. "Baby, I wish you wouldn't smoke, I understand that it makes you feel better but it's not going you any good. I quit smoking twenty years ago and if I quit then you should too, 'cause I never quit bad things."

"I can try, sugar."

"Good, I don't want you ruining your lungs." He goes silent for a minute or two, "I love you, baby."

"I love you too, sugar."

Florida stands up, he puts his hands under Louie's chins and tilts his head back. Florida presses his lips against Louisiana's. He pulls away and takes the cigarette out of Louie's hand and puts it out, "No more."