One Single Memory

Kabanata 12

I wonder how I came up to the point that no matter what I do, I can't have his heart. I've liked him, no scratch that, I've loved him for so long and I still couldn't believe it wasn't reciprocated. Alam kong may mga panahon na naiisip kong marahil ay bata pa ako sa paningin niya pero what excuse do I have now? I've all grown up. I've grown up enough but why can't he still like me?

Kalungkutan ang bumalot sa akin. I've realized maybe it's time to give up now. I've been fighting for so long, hoping for so long. Maybe this is the end of it. My longest battle has come to an end now. Axton is getting married and although I wasn't happy about it, maybe I could at least accept it.

Sa isang private island sila kinasal sa Laiya din. My eyes watered unintentionally when I saw his bride, slowly walking down the aisle. And it wasn't because of joy, but because I envy her. Noong bata pa ako, pinangarap ko ring maikasal sa lalaking mahal ko. That I would wear a long white gown and a flower crown. Natupad nga iyon pero hindi sa lalaking pinapangarap ko.

Nagpalakpakan ang lahat ng i-anunsyo na ng Pari na sila'y mag asawa na. Napapikit na lang ako at tuluyan nang bumagsak ang mga luha ko. Wala na. Tapos na. It's finally over Zosia. You exhausted yourself now, move on.

"Congratulations!"

"Congrats, kuya!"

"Hey bud, congrats."

Isa-isa na silang lumapit sa bagong kasal at bumati samantalang nanatili naman akong tulala sa kawalan.

"Zosia! Come here! Picture tayo!" pag aya ni Cassie.

I forced a smile and just waved my hand. They had a family picture except for Priam that looking at me intently from afar. Kanina pa din siya tinatawag ngunit parang wala siyang naririnig.

"Zosia!" pagtawag ni Axton.

Sinenyasan niya akong lumapit. Everyone is eyeing me so I had no choice but to go. Tinawag niya rin si Priam and we took several pictures. I don't know how to flash a genuine smile. If it isn't awkward I'm sure it's sarcastic. Pagkatapos ng iilang picture taking pa ay dumiretso na ang ibang bisita sa reception area.

"Hi Zosia, how have you been?" palakaibigang ngiti ni Xiomara.

I didn't expect she'll approach me. Hindi ko siya maalala kaya hindi ko alam kung paano siya pakikitunguhan. If she was his girlfriend for a long time then maybe we were not in good terms. But somehow, I don't want to be rude. It's their wedding day and no matter how bad I am, I just can't ruin a very special day.

"I'm doing good." Tipid akong ngumiti.

Nagkatinginan naman silang mag asawa bago ngumisi sa akin.

"Thank you for coming. Let's go? Wait, where's your husband?" Iginala niya ang paningin.

Ganoon din ang ginawa ko. Priam isn't here anymore.

"Baka nandoon na," sagot ko.

"Oh, okay then. Let's go? Our visitors are waiting." She giggled.

"Excited much baby?" Ngumisi si Axton.

She elbowed him and looked at me, slightly smirking. Tumikhim ako sa kung ano'ng nakabara sa lalamunan ko. I smiled bitterly and headed first.

Dumaan ang ilang linggo at inabala ko ang sarili sa pagbubukas muli ng aking cake shop. They told me I'm getting back on the track. My baking is improving and just a few touches and practices then I'll be off to open my shop again. Nitong mga nakaraang araw din ay iwinaksi ko na sa isipan ko ang tungkol kay Axton. Our chapter has ended so I needed to turn the page now. Panibagong araw, panibagong buhay. At napag isip-isip ko na rin na kung sakaling hindi na nga bumalik nang tuluyan ang mga alaala ko ay magsisimula na lang uli ako ng panibagong buhay.