no matter what decision your heart makes, I will be waiting for you...

chapter 1

'you will always be my greatest adventure' I read the last line of my book. Damn, it was a good book, and every time I finish a book I feel so empty again. Like I just went through a breakup or something. Before I even have the time to process my mourning phase, there is already a knock on my door and Harrison walks in.
"Y/N I'm driving Tom and his girlfriend (cassie) to the airport now, are you coming with us?" Oh yeah, Tom's girlfriend has visited us for 2 weeks, she is very nice, can be a bitch at times, simple girl but sometimes I think that she is not doing Tom so well, she constantly has to go because some new guy calls her but tom doesn't really notice it, I think that's how it works if you love someone.
"Hmm no thanks, I'm a little tired, I think I'll take a nap while you guys are away"
I mumble while Harrison leans against the door frame. At least then I will have time to let a tear or two escape.
"okay, take care of yourself, we'll be back in 2 hours at the latest"
Harrison is always overprotective, even when we were little children he loved to play the role of the big strong brother, as well as Tom. They always protected me when a boy was mean to me or something else. Sometimes they fighted with other guys but that was probably like 10 years ago. And now I'm 21 and Tom and Haz 23. So that shit doesn't really matter anymore.
"Alright bye" I said and he left. I lay in bed for a while and let my thoughts about the book run through my head. But I got a little tired and fell asleep. I don't usually take naps, don't get me wrong, I sleep pretty much all the time but I can never fall asleep at lunchtime. But with the book and my tired, sad eyes, I did. At least until a warm hand woke me from my sleep 2 hours later. Just a few little jiggles and my eyes flickered open.
"Y/N hey wake up, dinner is ready" Tom whispered in a soft voice. Tom can be a real jerk, but when he talks to me with his soft voice, he triggers a feeling in me that I don't know. But it feels good, like someone is looking after me, caring or something.
"what are we having?" you ask, rubbing your eyes
"we brought pizza on the way back" he whispers, makes me directly sit up straight to stand up.
"I always know how to get you out of bed" he laughs. I sat down at the table where my brother was already putting a slice of pizza on my plate.
"and Tom, how are you doing after taking your girlfriend to the airport?"
I try to tease him a bit that his girlfriend is no longer there, but he just shrugs his shoulders.
"I'll be fine, she said she'll call me as soon as she lands" He says with a slight smile on his face.
"Haz, do you wanna watch a movie later?" I ask
"sorry Y/N, I'll be with jenna (his girlfriend) later" He answers
"Oh okay" I take a bite into my pizza, quickly shrugging the topic off.
"we can watch a film until Cassie calls if you want" Tom offers as his eyes look up at me. To be honest I don't usually do something with Tom. Tom and I haven't really gotten along since high school, long story, doesn't matter. Since then, at least, we tend to pretend to hate each other. So it's always something new for me to see him being nice to me, like today.
"Of course, thanks Tom" I smile in thanks.
I put my plate in the dishwasher while Harrison was already packing his things to go to Jenna's.
"Alright , see ya later guys and no cuddling, kissing or anything else. I trust you Tom"
he says while scurrying out the door
"What about me?!!" I pout, laughing. And he was gone...
"alright Y/N do you already know which film you want to watch?" Tom asks
"what do you think of, to all the boy I've loved before?" I answer
"sounds like a love story and I think neither Harrison nor Cassie would like it if we watch this movie" He's right, still a bit uptight. I know he doesn't want to go too far with me, and neither do I with him. Gross no... but it's just a movie anyway.
"you are right what then?" I ask and look at him
"Maybe cars" he says and smiles like a child.
Cars, not my favourite film. But Tom's eyes sparkle more than those of the children who see their presents right in front of them. So as stupid as I am, I'll go along with it.
"Fine you little child" I roll my eyes, smiling at his behaviour.
He grins broadly, and while he starts the film, I fetch the snacks.
I deliberately sat down at the other end of the couch, knowing that Tom would surely want a huge gap between us, as if I were poisonous or contagious from something. The scenes played out and time passed. Halfway through the film, Cassie still hadn't called. Which is weird when she should have landed 10 minutes ago. (Ignore the fact that she flew about 30 minutes from new york to california. I was stupid)
"when does she arrive in california?" I ask, turning my gaze away from the television to him.
"She should have landed 10 minutes ago, she drives home first and then calls me" he explained to me, but to be honest he sounded more like he was trying to tell himself until he believed it.
When the film was over and Cassie should have called by now, we put the snacks back in the kitchen and talked a bit. While he was rambling on, I reached into the popcorn bowl, took one out and threw it in a high arc straight into my mouth. When he caught my throw, his mouth almost hung open a bit, I could saw that from the corner of my eye.
"not bad young lady but I bet I can throw it higher and catch it again" he said with a smirk plastered on his lips.
"fine try it" I hand him the popcorn bowl and he takes one out.
"Alright watch and learn" he throws the popcorn about 2 meters high into the air and catches it elegantly and skilfully with his mouth
"That was luck you dumbass" I say with a smirk, knowing it'll piss him off.
With my left hand I grab another popcorn out of the bowl.
"Look , 3 meters" I say before throwing the popcorn 3 meters high and catching it again.
"not bad, I would do 4 meters but the ceiling isn't that high" he challenges.
"cheap excuse, we should go up on the roof and continue playing there, dumbass" I say and officially challenge him.
"Is dumbass now my new nickname?" He asks
"Yepp dumbass" you giggle
"Alright then I'll think of a nickname for you now" He looks thoughtfully at the wall behind me while he runs his hand over his non-existent beard.
"what do you think of loser?" He asks with his smirk.
"sounds nice but suits you better, don't you think?" that was a goooodd one Y/N!
"No no, it suits you quite well for you" he says
"I have a bet for you" I say and look at him
"Alright what is it LOSER" he giggles
"we go up on the roof now and see who can throw the popcorn higher and catch it again with the mouth, if I win I can choose how you will call me for the next month and if you win, you can choose what I have to call you for the next month... Deal?" I hold out my hand for him to shake, which he then also does.
"Dealll... Loser"
So we took the popcorn bowls and went up to the roof.
It is already dark and I can look over the streets of New York which are brightly lit and still many people are walking across the streets.
Tom starts and throws a popcorn about 4 meters in the air, which is hard to see, but it ends up in Tom's mouth again. Respect.
"Only luck" I say, taking a popcorn out of the huge bowl.
With a high throw of 5 metres, it lands perfectly back in my mouth, leaving Tom's jaw hanging and my lips smirking.
"Uhhh this is how you do it right" I tease, chewing my popcorn.
"I can beat that" he says, taking out a popcorn and throwing it up, it flew just 3 meters high and he didn't manage to catch it again.
"Shittt" he says and kicks a broken sofa that has been there for years. Sometimes I would come up and sit on the old musty sofa just to look at the stars. Most of the time you can't see them because of the city lights, which I think is a bit of a shame, but they still also are a beautiful sight.
"Yessss" I rejoice, throw my arms in the air.
"Who is the winner? I am the winner" I sing while doing my silly victory dance around him. Tom hates it when I do it, probably just because he hates to lose.
"That wasn't fair the wind blew the popcorn away" he tries to talk his way out of it, but I ignore him and keep dancing.
"Nope I'm sorry dumbass but you know what?"
"What?" He says annoyed
"for the next month you can call me queen" yep, that'll fuck him up. I know that already.
"What no Y/N come onnn" he pleads.
"What did you just say?" I ask teasingly. I just can't stop teasing him.
"...Nothing QUEEN"
"then that's fine, I thought you said Y/N for a moment" While I continue to do my victory dance in my mind, his mood goes downhill.
"I don't feel like it anymore" he says grumpily and goes inside.
Is he seriously offended because I won? after all, it's just a game and that was the rule...
With the popcorn bowl in my hand, I make my way back to our flat. Just as I put the big bowl of half-full popcorn down, I hear Tom's voice coming from his room.
With quiet footsteps I crept up to his door, which was still a gap open. I wouldn't say it was eavesdropping, more like curious listening.
"Why didn't you called me baby? I miss you already, you know that." He says and I can literally see the pout on his lips. This is so wrong Y/N! Anyways...
"then you could have written to me !" He says.
Just as Tom was about to speak up again, the front door opens, startling me and making me jump against the wall.
"what the- Y/N?? are you eavesdropping tom on the phone?" Harrisons says loudly. Idiot!
I freeze. With all my hope that I have, I pray that Tom has not heard Haz. But when not a second later his footsteps echo through the room and the door right next to my ear slams shut, making me flinch, I have my answer.

"Ughh harrison noo I wasn't eavesdropping him on the phone". His eyebrows twitch up. Seems like he doesn't believe me, and if I'm honest, I don't even believe myself in this one.
"but it did look pretty much like that"
he says while I was already leaving in the direction of my room, also slamming the door behind me.
"Whatever" I mumble.
My oh so soft pillow, which I love, I now grab between my finger claws and scream into the pillow. Luckily not too loud that anyone hears me.
" that was so embarassing " I whine.
After a little more self-embarrassment, I thankfully fell asleep. Damn it, why does this have to happen to me of all people?