Kpop Little Space Oneshots || ✔

Pretty | Pt 2 || Astro

⚠TW MENTIONS OF INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS⚠
How would you guys feel if I made this into a short story? Would anyone read it?

    About two weeks passed by, Dongmin building up the courage to tell Moonbin what was going on every day. Yes, every day. Since they started the thoughts haven't stopped. Dongmin was down to at least one meal a day and still wouldn't look at any mirrors. He had also become clingier toward Moonbin.
    The last time he'd managed to slip had been around a week into his situation. Even then he'd only been able to slip for around an hour, sitting quietly and doing nothing. Moonbin had sat with him the whole time he was little, not asking a single question. After Dongmin had come out of his headspace, he'd felt a bit better about the whole situation, his courage started building.
    And today is the day.
    Today, Dongmin is going to tell Moonbin everything.

    "Binnie?" Dongmin called from the living room. His heart was beating in his throat, palms sweaty, a slight shake of the hand. "Yeah?" came a faint reply. "Could you come here, please?" A couple of moments passed before the little heard footsteps coming down the hall, Moonbin appearing in the room quickly.
    Dongmin watched as Moonbin walked over and sat down next to him. "What's up?" Taking a deep breath, the little tried his best to calm down. "I wanna talk... About what's been going on..." Moonbin nodded. "I looked it up, what's been happening, and I guess it's called intrusive thoughts. Well, I say "I guess" because the definition explains what I've been experiencing."
    Dongmin paused, his breathing a little shallow. "Intrusive thoughts are negative thoughts that you get that are unwelcome and involuntary. For me, they're especially upsetting because of what they say." Moonbin took one of Dongmin's hands in his own, running a thumb over his knuckles, something the little found comforting.
    "They tell me that I'm not skinny enough, that I shouldn't be little... That I'm not good enough to be with you. Through these thoughts and many more, there seems to be a running theme. That I'm simply not enough." Breathing shaky, shallow breaths, Dongmin looked up and tried his hardest not to cry.
    "I wanna be pretty, so pretty that I'm worthy of your love."
    When he looked back down, Moonbin was smiling a small, sad smile. "Well," the caregiver started. "I'm glad you told me this. I know it couldn't've been easy for you but I hope you know how brave you are for telling me." Moonbin moved over so that he was sitting right next to Dongmin. He took his little's other hand in his, giving them a reassuring squeeze.
    "It's okay to feel things. It's okay to not be okay all the time. And you're so pretty. You're so pretty it hurts. I can't fathom how you can't see that, but I understand, and, I say this not to invalidate your feelings, but to bring comfort in knowing that you're not alone. There are others out there struggling with the same thing and, if they're still going, you can do this. I'll be here to help you in any way I can. If you feel like crying, I'll hold you. If you feel like screaming, I'll scream with you. You don't have to do this alone."
    The thought of screaming set a kind of fire in Dongmin's heart. "I wanna scream. I wanna scream so loud I won't be able to talk tomorrow, so hard all these feelings float away, if only for a second!" Moonbin smiled, standing up and pulling Dongmin up with him. "What?" the little asked. Moonbin put a finger to his lips. "Secret!"

    The two had been driving for a while and Dongmin had long since lost track of where they were. "Binnie..." Moonbin had been smiling and humming along quietly to what was playing on the radio. He'd been holding onto Dongmin's hand the entire time, squeezing it every now and then.
    When they pulled into a parking space and got out of the car, Dongmin realized where they were. The salty smell of the sea invaded his nose. "C'mon!" Moonbin said, grabbing his little's hand and breaking out into a jog. When they reached the empty beach, Moonbin stopped and smiled at Dongmin.
    He turned to the soft waves and screamed.
    Dongmin started, the millions of thoughts running through his head all ceasing as he did the same. It felt as if the weight he'd been carrying around all this time was finally lifting. The first scream was just that, a scream, but the ones that followed included words.
    "I WISH I COULD BE PERFECT!"
    "I WISH HE COULD SEE HOW PERFECT HE IS!"
    "I WISH I WAS SKINNY!"
    "I WISH MY BOSS WASN'T SO MEAN!"
    "I WISH I COULD SEE MYSELF THROUGH BINNIE'S EYES, BECAUSE MAYBE THEN I COULD LOVE ME LIKE HIM!"
    "I WISH I COULD HELP HIM MORE THAN I CAN!"
    "I WISH I WERE ENOUGH!"
    It got quiet, tears falling, heavy breathing, and the weight of the world lifted from their shoulders. "I am enough," Dongmin whispered. This time, he screamed so hard he bent over, face red.
    "I AM ENOUGH!"