The Year We Had (MCYT AU)

38: Longing

Game day always started early for Dream. Usually he would wake early to collect his things and slip out of the dorm room by six, giving him plenty of time to squeeze in some last minute practice before the school day began. 

Usually Techno would sleep through the whole thing, and meet him in the dining hall. He'd give him a wordless nod, and they'd sit down at their usual table with the rest of their friends. That was how Friday's went.

This morning was different. This morning, Techno was up before Dream, sitting in the dark holding a picture frame gently between his two hands.

"Techno?" Dream asked, his voice filled with sleep as he sat up and smoothed his bedhead down. "You good? You're never up at five."

"I, uh..." Techno hummed, trailing off for a moment. His voice was slightly croaky, like he'd been crying. "I couldn't sleep. Hard day, today."

Dream sat up and carefully flicked on the lamp on his side table. Techno glanced over at him, forcing a small smile. His eyes were puffy and red. His eyebrows flicked upwards for a moment, and he looked away. "Sorry. You should get going to practice. Friday's are big days for you."

The blonde haired boy frowned as he leant back against the wall, crossing his legs underneath him. "You wanna talk, man?"

Techno cleared his throat, glancing back down at the picture frame between his hands. "I, uh, I don't know." He sniffled and wiped at his eyes before any more tears could escape. These emotions were foreign and overpowering. He usually just pushed them back, but this hurt too badly. Dream said nothing, and eventually Techno spoke again. "It's, um, it's kind of my best friends birthday today."

Dream waited, because it was clear that there was more to this. Techno took a shuddering breath and licked his dry lips as he tried to compose himself.  "He's dead, you see. So it's not really, uh, not an easy day."

"I'm sorry." Dream said quietly, his eyes falling to his hands. "That's gotta be one of the hardest days to live through."

Techno sniffled again, wiping his nose with his sleeve. "Yeah, it hurts more than I thought it would." He laughed weakly. "He would have been seventeen."

Dream wasn't quite sure what to say to that. Thankfully, Techno kept talking. "He died in the explosion. It was my fault. I could have gotten him out, but I didn't, and then they didn't even know he was in there. They never...They never even recovered his body. There wasn't anything left. That's on me."

Dream's eyebrows drew together, and he opened his mouth to tell him that it wasn't true, but Techno wasn't done yet. He let out a laugh, his tone warming ever so slightly.
"We always did this thing, on birthdays. We-- we used to sit outside together and drink this god awful soda. You know that blue shit, with enough sugar to see you through for a year? Yeah. That stuff. Because blue is-- blue was his favourite colour. This is the first time that we haven't done it."

There was a long, painful pause. When Dream spoke next, his voice was soft. "Techno, what happened to him wasn't your fault. You...you were unconscious, right? There wasn't anything you could have done."

"Yeah, well he's still gone." Techno said bitterly, staring down at the picture frame. A couple of stray tears slid down his cheeks. "Couldn't even attend the funeral. I was still in the hospital. And Wilbur was all wrapped up with the legal shit. Same with Phil. So Tommy went in my place. Watched them put a box in the ground."

Dream stared at him for a long, hard moment. He glanced at his alarm clock for a moment, and then sat up a little straighter. "I'm skipping practice today. We've got something to do."