Finding Us!

Wake up call

Jake pov~

She loves me?

But....how can she?

Whatever happened last nigh,t was absolutely out of the blue. I never expected her, to barge into my room and lash out like that but, the thing that shook me the most, was her confession.

She loved me.

But, since when? Why? And.... How?

From the very beginning I've been nothing but, a complete asshole to her. I've treated her harshly, roughly, horribly. Yet, she loved me...

Why did she?
How can she?

She said, she's heard everything between me & dad, and yet, she didn't speak a single word about it? She said, she's loved everything that belonged to me, so she actually loved Mariah? She said, she let me touch her, 'cause she was in love with me so, that night... She made love to me?

I sighed heavily and got out of the covers. I couldn't get sleep for even, a blink of an eye, last night.

I really messed up this time.

But, the thing that shook me to the core was her face. Covered in tears, hurt and pain. Tremendous pain.

Looking at her, it pained.....me.

I should've been blaming her, for falling for me but, even the thought of it, makes me feel shame. Ashamed of myself.

God, Emily. What have I done?

I get out of my bed and get into the bathroom to freshen up. But, the constant thought, of her tear stained face, doesn't just go away.

I come out of the bathroom, bathed yet I don't feel completely awake.

I'll sure need, few extra cups of coffee today. I was about to get into my coat suit when, I hear the room to my door open. I quickly put on a t-shirt at hand and sweats on. I go out of the closest to look, and find Mariah.

"Mariah? What are you doing here?" I asked confused.

"Daddy, can I go with mommy on vacation?" She asked, grinning at me, with a pleading eyes.

Mommy?

"Who's mommy? And what vacation?" I asked sharply, than I actually intended to.

"Anne. She's my mommy, now." She said, almost giggling with joy and for a second, tremendous amount of guilt, filled me completely. "And she's going to her mom's house for vacation. Can I also go? Please?" She asked, pleading me.

"Mom's house?" I whispered more to myself. She's going back to New York?

"No! You're not going anywhere." I said, as calmly as possible.

"But, daddy plea-"

"I said no, Mariah!!" I scream loudly and my voice boomed through out the room, as she flinches back, her eyes quickly filling with tears. I instantly regretted raising my voice at her.

"Mariah bab-" she cutts me off.

"I'm going with her!! I'm going." She said, and turned quickly, wiping her tears and running out of the room.

I fucked up!

I just sit there, holding my head in my hands, just feeling everything move too fast. She's going? For real?

I quickly get up from my place and start making my way, to her room. I quickly open it without even knocking and look at her back facing me as, she tied her hair, looking into the mirror.

She saw me standing in the door frame, through the mirror and just ignored me.

My eyes, reckon through the rest of the room and I see, three different bags, ready and packed. She's really going?

"Where are you going?" I ask. My voice coming out more softer, than I ever intended it to be. It was almost like, i was asking myself.

"Back home." She said and quickly rubbed something over her hands, keeping different things into her purse.

"Why?" I asked, my voice stern this time. But, that either didn't seem to faze her.

"Their's nothing left here, to stay." She said and I couldn't utter even a single word further.

How could I? I was indeed responsible for this.

Last night, was a wake up call.

For me.
For both of us.

_-_-_-_-_-_

I watched as, Dorothy helped Mariah bring her bags down, from the stair. As I sat their, on the couch, looking at her. She was dead set on avoiding my gaze. Probably punishing me in her innocent way.

Soon, she descended the stairs and almost ran to her. Holding her hand, she tried to drag her own, bag upto the car.

Soon, the driver, kept their luggage into the trunk and they were leaving.

I had to do something.

"Mariah?" I called out softly.

Mariah turned completely yet, she didn't. But, I knew she was listening. Closely.

"Won't you say good-bye to me?" I asked.

"No.", She turned away quickly and was about to go, out of the door when, Anne pulled her back gently. She didn't move from her place.

"Mariah, go & say good-bye to daddy." She said, scolding her softly. Mariah made a face but, contemplated over her decision, as she saw Anne giving her an unfazed look. Soon, she let go of her hand and she walked towards me.

I quickly sat down on my knees and opened my arms out.

She ran into me, hugging me quickly and I hugged her closer to me. I know I've fucked up but, maybe this is how things are meant to be. Maybe.

"I'll miss you." I tell her and she replies back with a quick 'miss you too'.

I released her and she ran back to her. And without even glancing back, for a second, she went out. She didn't even turn, as Mariah did to wave at me, through the car window.

All this time, she had her eyes casted down.

And I couldn't look her in the eye.
Not till the last.

As I saw the car going out of the metal doors, I realized something. I realized that now, I trusted someone else, with Mariah's life other than myself. I realized that, I regretted all of my actions, completely.

And the most important one.

I've always wanted her to leave this house....

But, it hurted when she actually did.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_--●--_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Hello my loves💜

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Song recommendation;
Symphony ~ Zara Larsson ft. Clean bandits

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