Hailee Steinfeld Imagine

The Love We Lost

Hailee's P.O.V

I sighed when my eyes opened just a bit. The room was still dark with the moonlight rays beaming through the curtains. The time on the clock was 4:45 am. I haven't been able to sleep for months now. Always waking up at odd hours of the night. All because I kept dreaming about my ex (y/n) and the love we once had, but lost along the way. Kept dreaming of the love that she had suffered so much and now... now I am lost without
(y/n).

(Y/n) always told me that she loved me and proved it time and time me again. There was never any doubt that she didn't. But, I just had to break her heart and hurt her. That's why our love had failed. Because of me. Maybe (y/n) didn't know how much I loved her, and maybe to her it doesn't matter anymore, but ever since we broke up I haven't stopped crying. Even now after months sleeping alone in the bed we once shared.

When I got up from my bed, I felt my body go into auto pilot. Taking a shower and getting dressed into a pair of jeans and
(y/n) favorite hoodie. Then I grabbed my keys and left my house.

Driving for hours to take my mind off of everything did help just a bit. Just staring at the sunrise while listening to music was the perfect medicine to clear my mind. Maybe it was a little to clear since by the time I stopped driving I was at the beach. The very beach (y/n) and I had many fond memories in. Where she took me on a romantic beach side dinner, where she taught me how to surf, and having a bond fire while we Star gazed as she sang me her favorite songs. They were mainly my songs but they were the songs about us and us only.

I got out of the car and made my way towards the sand, taking off my shoes as soon as I got close. It was early morning so the sand wasn't hot but a nice warmth. It felt relaxing and soft. It seemed like a perfect day for a beach day once the sun raises higher. No clouds, no wind, nothing but clear sky's and sun. Perfect. But I didn't feel perfect. No day ever felt perfect anymore.

When I got close enough to the ocean I sat down, watching as the waves crashed. The waves were big.

"Last one in pays for lunch" I heard a familiar voice cheerfully shout.

"Not me!" Another familiar voice yelled out. I quickly turned around to see, two girls in wet suits running with surfboards. I narrowed my eyes when I noticed (y/n) and her best friend Lauren jauregui. She always hated me, and I finally gave her a good reason to do so. I saw Lauren jump straight into the water and (y/n) who had the jacket of her wetsuit off her shoulders, tide around her waist just staring at the sea in awe. The sun kissing her skin, making her long hair shine elegantly. God was she always this beautiful.

She turned towards me and we finally locked eyes. She was quick to look forward before shaking her head and turning back towards me, lifting up her hand slightly to wave but she didn't move her wrist. She gave me a sad smile, and all I could do was smile back.

"(Y/n) are you going to get in or!—" I heard Lauren shouting. I looked over to see her on the board, arms crossed as she glared at me.

"I'm going" (y/n) shouted back, fixing her hair into a high pony tail. When she grabbed her board I was quick on my feet and rushed to her side grabbing her arm, preventing her from moving forward. "H-hi" she said above a whisper, stuttering.

"H-hey. I Uh... I left messages and I texted you... a lot" I told her, eyes Locked on her as her gazed was focused anywhere else but me.

"Yeah I know, I saw" she said taking a deep breath.

"C-can we talk... please" I pleaded still keeping a death grip on her arm thinking that if I let go I'd never see her again.

"I-I don't think that's a good idea" she sighed rubbing her neck.