Hermitcraft Incorrect Quotes

48

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Hels, on the phone with Biffa: X is having a midlife crisis, and Ex is just having a crisis.

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Tango: What are the rules of Monopoly?

Keralis: If the game lasts over 4 hours you get the legal right to kill the person who asked to play.

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Grian: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life.

Ex: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?

Grian: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.

Zedaph: Edible.

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BadTimes: God built me different and not in a good way.

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Hypno: You know what they say: a little childhood trauma builds character.

Hypno: *finger guns*

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Impulse, tending to Fasle's wound: How would you rate your pain?

False: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

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Tfc: where's Bdubs?

Doc: he's short, probably hiding under something.

Bdubs, getting ready to jump on Doc from the vents:

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Wels: Time for plan G.

xB: Don't you mean plan B?

Wels: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Beef: What about plan D?

Wels: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

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*police sirens blaring in the distance*

X, who hasn't done anything wrong in his life: They found me.

Biffa, who has 118 active warrants for breaking and entering, homicide and theft: Glad I'm not you right now.

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Joe: Stop setting things on fire just because you're curious about what will happen. What will happen will be fire

Cleo: But what if this one time-

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Cub: Okay, so I figured out a foolproof method of determining if someone is evil.

Scar: And that is?

Cub: If they dislike Stress, they're evil.

Etho: Huh.

Jevin: I mean...

Iskall: You know, that makes sense.

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Stress : * Sneezes*

Mumbo : Hail Satan.

Stress: ...

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Wels: If dick size is defined by how small your car is and how big your feet are, then clowns-

Hels, on the verge of tears: It's 2 am, please, stop

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Cleo: Dying sucks, how do you living beings cope with mortality?

Ex: Violent outbursts

Grian: General chaos

Mumbo: Denial

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BadTimes: what are you drinking?

Ex: vodka.

BadTimes: ...just straight?

Ex: bi, actually. we've been over this.

BadTimes: not you, the vodka--

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Keralis: Bdubs just brought me a glass of wine and said "here's your Christmas juice" and now he's the one I'm leaving everything to in my will.

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Tango: [Explaining his plan to rescue Grian]

Iskall: This sounds illegal...go for it

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Jevin: Look guys, I need your help.

Ren: Love help?

Wels: Legal help?

Iskall: Relationship help?

Scar: Magic help?

Stress: Emotional help?

Biffa: Help moving a body?

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X: Hey sorry I'm late, I overslept.

Joe: It's 4:30 in the afternoon.

X: What's your point?

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Grian, texting Scar: Scar! Help I'm being kidnapped

Scar: Where are you?

Grian: I'm with some strange person. In a car. Help.

Scar: I'll call Ex.

Ex, answering their cell: Y'ello?

Scar: Where's G? He texted me that he was being kidnapped.

Ex: Gri? Whaddya mean, he's right next to me-

Ex: ...

Ex: I'll call you back. *hangs up*

Ex: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN'T THAT BAD!

Grian: WHO ARE YOU?!

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Today's Question:

What smell is the texture of Minecraft snow if it is a Wednesday on Saturday and you are inside out?

I hope you enjoyed this chapter (that most defiantly isn't a day late I don't know what you're on  about-) until the next one, bye! ~Mors