"..." – Harry
***
Song: We The Kings - Sad Song
Three days ago, Harry was sent for compulsory treatment to a psychiatric hospital in South London. I have been forbidden to see him for three days. They say that "if everything goes well," they will let me see him in a week, but I have no idea what their "well" means. I'm going crazy because they don't tell me anything, they don't explain anything. If this continues, I'll need a hospital myself.
His father said Asshole was at Carla's house because he didn't have time to take care of him. I'm on my way to pick him up right now. This is Harry's dog, and if they think that anything related to Harry will be away from me, then let them think again. This is our dog.
I park in front of her house, she opens the door and, as soon as she sees me on the threshold, she immediately takes me in her arms. I try not to put too much pressure on her huge belly. I like Carla, really. She looks at me sadly, and it's a little comforting because she's not a member of Harry's family either, but she's also worried about him. She was his friend, his only friend.
"How are you?"
I shrug my shoulders.
"They don't let me see him."
"I know, and they don't let me see him either."
I take two steps and Asshole immediately jumps on me. He spins around me wagging his tail, he climbs up to my waist standing on his paws, he jumps, and starts again. He never gave me a party like that. He seems so happy to see me that I have tears in my eyes... I realize that he loves me too, maybe not the way he loves Harry, but I care about him too. My heart squeezes so hard that I feel like crying. Carla's husky runs out after him. Asshole is fine here, he's got a friend and all, but the fact that he's still happy to see me and he's glued to me as if he's afraid that I will leave without him, he wants to be with me and that calms me down. Carla brings the tea and starts talking. She says something about giving birth, that she and her fiancé still don't want to know the sex of the baby, but it makes it harder to buy clothes, and so on. We don't touch on the subject of that night. All she knows is that I found Harry, and I'm very grateful that she doesn't try to find out more. I say something a couple of times and nod, but I'm not here. To be honest, I don't know if I'm anywhere at all.
"I'm always here, Louis."
"Hmm?"
I turn my attention to her. She realized that I wasn't listening, but I'm so tired that I don't even want to make excuses.
"If you need to talk, you can come at any time, even in the middle of the night. I'm always here for you."
I nod my thanks to her. When she walks me to the door, she hugs me again. The day she asked Harry to be her child's godfather, she gave him the same hug.
I didn't think it would ever happen, but Asshole is sitting in the backseat of my car and I don't give a damn if he gets it dirty or scratched. Really, I don't care about anything. I arrive at Harry's house, and as soon as Asshole finds out where we are, he starts vigorously waving his tail and fidgeting on the spot. We get out of the car in the backyard, and I close my eyes as I pass Harry's car. It is here, but he is not.
Asshole is running in different directions waiting for me to open the glass door, he is very excited. When I do, he furiously runs inside and looks around, sniffing every corner. He runs into the dressing room, then into the bathroom. I know what he's doing, he's looking for Harry.
"He's not here."
But he doesn't understand. I throw my jacket on the chair, take off my shoes, my pants and even it's only 6 pm, fall down on the bed. I watch Asshole run frantically from room to room, wagging his tail less and less.
