"What would you do if you had only 100 days to live?"- Anonym
"I don't know. I would just live, I guess, I would just try to live."- Louis.
All have a past and a present. But some people have to fight to have a future.
In this story, you'll discover...
I replay the memories of last night in my head, and they look so unreal. The wind blows gently in my face, and I can still feel his hands on my body. I can still feel the tremor of his touch.
The sun barely breaks through the thick curtains on the glass doors. It warms his skin and reflects in his eyes, which have never been so bright before. He's lying on top of me, leaning on his elbows to keep from crushing me, and his eyes are hotter than any sun right now. My hands are on his torso, tracing the outline of two swallows, so weightless as if he might vanish at any moment. I'm so afraid of hurting him, spoiling him, like he's a fragile porcelain doll. His lips find mine and slide down my neck. I arch my back as he kisses my stomach. And as soon as I realize what he's going to do, my heart starts beating so hard that it's impossible to breathe. I try to push him away, barely whispering.
"No...."
He looks up, and when our eyes meet, I know I'll never forget that moment. Time seems to have stopped, and the Earth has long been in the habit of stopping its rotation for us.
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"Please"
And when he whispers those words, I don't have any strength to fight. I take my hands off his shoulders and grab the sheets. When his lips wrap around me, my whole body feels like it's on fire. He acts uncertainly. He's far from the skills of Eleanor and the other girls I've slept with before. But he still surpasses them all. With his awkwardness, his love, his tenderness, he outshines them all as if they had never existed.
My body shudders, my fingers clutching the sheets, the ground still standing. I arch my back. His hair tickles my stomach with every movement.
"You...you...it tickles..."
And I can feel him smiling into my skin.
Remembering this, goosebumps run through my body. I open my eyes and look at the phone screen. 8 am. An hour ago, we were sleeping in his room, and he got a call from the veterinary clinic, so he had to leave immediately, and I had to... And for some reason, I wanted to come here. I don't know why. I adjust the collar of my coat and step forward. I put my hands on the railing and take a deep breath. I close my eyes because I know that as soon as I look at the highway, I will see him standing on the edge and jumping into the abyss. I clench my fists harder, but all I can see is the memory of last night: no blood, no outstretched arms, no fear that he might come back here. Only us, only love.
"I..."
He bites his lip and blushes, reaching for the bedside table. Sitting between my legs, he twirls a blue tube in his hands, without actually daring to look at me. I think I'm blushing too. It's a stupid thing to do to someone you love, but... I like this awkwardness. It proves that this is a first for us.
