"It wasn't always this way. They used to be loving parents. I still have good memories of them... which is why I never did anything... also because It's my fault that they're the way they are... or were. Before you interject, please comment after. It's alot for me to make myself talk about." Minho nods, understanding.
"Chan disagrees with me, but I feel like it's my fault... When I was 7, my mom told me I was going to be a big brother...
"REALLY?!" Jisung yelled, excitedly. His mother giggled at her cute little boy.
"Yes, Jiji. You're going to have a baby sister!" Jisung beamed at his parents.
"She can have my room, and I'll give her my toys! When will she be here??"
His parents laughed at their son's eagerness.
"About 6 months, sweetie." Jisung jumps up and down excitedly.
"This is the best day ever!!"
"You did say you wanted a sibling for Christmas." His dad joked, causing his mom to smack his arm playfully.
"Can we paint my room for her?? Do you think she will like Yellow?? Yellow is a happy colour!"
"Sure, Jiji."
"Can we do it nowwww??!!" He asked, wanting everything to be perfect for his baby sister.
"Of course, sweetie." The family drove to the paint store, picking out the best supplies. Then, Jisung saw fairy lights.
"Those too!! Please mommy!! Please daddy!!" They agree to their son's wishes. The family paints and decorates the room to their son's vision. "I hope she loves me!" Jisung giggled.
*3 months later*
"Mommy! What are we naming my sister?" Jisung asked, curiously. "I want to make a sign for her bedroom door!" His mother kissed his forehead.
"Jae." She replied " So I'll have my Ji and my Jae." Jisung giggled.
"I love it mommy!!" He left to make his sign for Jae.
*one week later*
"Mrs. Han? Yes, this is the school nurse. Some bullies beat Jisung up pretty bad... would you like to come get him? Yes, of course! Thank you!"
"Is mommy coming?" Jisung sniffled.
"Yes hunny. She said "make sure you tell my Jiji that mommy says she will be right there and that we can get ice cream."
*4 hours later*
"Is she ever going to wake up, doctor? Is my mommy going to be okay?" Jisung cried. The doctor looked at the father and son.
"She will be alright. However, I'm afraid we could not save the baby."
"Jae??" Jisung asks, crying harder. "No. You have to! That's my sister!!" The doctor looks down sadly.
"I'm so sorry, kiddo." Hours passed and Jisung's mom woke up. "Mommy?" Jisung asked, crying.
"Jiji! Are you okay?" She tried to sit up, groaning in pain.
"Mommy! Be careful not to hurt yourself!" Jisung said, holding his mother's hand.
"Thank you, baby."
"The doctor said he will be right in to see you."
"Okay Jiji. Where's dad?" She asked.
"Oh... Daddy said he had to go get something." Jisung sniffles. The doctor came in, making Jisung start to cry more. Once the doctor delivered the news, Jisung's mom started crying.
"Come here, Jiji." She said, scooting over to hold her child. They laid like that until Jisung's dad came back, not saying a word.
*a few weeks later*
After the hospital, Jisung's dad turned to drugs, yelling at Jisung that Jae's death was his fault.
"You almost killed my wife because you were too much of a pussy and got beat up. And that killed my daughter. You killed my daughter. You deserved that beating. And many more." He growled at the boy, giving him his first of many many beatings to come.
His mother stepped in front of Jisung. "WHY ARE YOU HURTING THE ONLY CHILD I HAVE LEFT?!" This enraged his father, who beat her up as well for siding with Jisung. All Jisung had left was his mother. That is, until his father started lacing his Mother's food with drugs, making her more distant, and eventually more violent. He watched day by day as his mother slipped away from him. The last piece of his mother was taken from him when his father found out she didn't take the pills he prescribed her and was lucid, sneaking food to the boy and comforting him. He beat her senseless, forcing her himself to take the pills. The last thing she said to him as herself had been "I love you, Jiji. Never lose hope." That had been six years ago.
The night his father beat them the first time, was also the first time Jisung took a blade to his own skin. To be able to control his pain was a godsend, and so cutting became an addiction to the boy. For years, he would mark his thighs, wishing his parents, especially his mother, would come back to him. But they never did. Because he killed his sister...
Jisung wipes away his snot and tears on his sweater. "My mother died six years ago. But now there's no hope of getting her back... that.. that wasn't my mom.. she-" Jisung loses it, sobbing. "I've killed my entire family now." Minho looks at him, heartbroken for the boy. He pulls him into his chest, whispering calming words to the distressed boy.
"Sungie. Can you look at me, baby?" Minho whispers. Jisung looks up, looking absolutely heartbroken. "Your mother doesn't blame you for your sister's death. If your father hadn't turned to drugs, he wouldn't have either. It is NOT your fault. Do you hear me?" Jisung just looks away. Minho gets on the floor on his knees, looking at Jisung. "It is NOT your fault." He repeats, pleading with his eyes.
"I-it is not my fault." Jisung says, only partially believing it.
"That's right. You're so brave. Oh my god, so brave." Minho hugs Jisung's waist from his position and then runs his fingers over the cuts. "When was the last time?" Jisung starts to cry again.
"A week or so ago. Chan threw the blade out and cleaned them for me... I'm sorry I'm ugly and scarred..." Minho looks at him, shocked, then leans down to kiss the scars on both thighs.
"You're not ugly. You're absolutely beautiful. Don't ever say you're ugly."
"T-thank you. And I'm sorry for not telling you before you liked me... maybe you would have saved yourself some trouble..."
"No no. Thank YOU for telling me. I appreciate you trusting me enough to tell me everything, even the scars. I would go through anything for you, Jisung. Anything at all."
"You're not mad?"
"On the contrary. I'm so proud of you." Minho stands up and pulls Jisung into a safe hug.
"I'm never letting you go." He says, kissing the smaller boy's forehead. "But we do need to meet at Felix's still." He adds.
Jisung giggles. "Oops."
YOU ARE READING
The Painting
Fanfiction"I want you to focus your energy on one piece of art this year. I want you to paint something by which you are enamored, inspired, or mystified." ⚠️|| Trigger Warnings ||⚠️ This book includes sensitive topics such as: - Alcohol Abuse - Bullying ...
