Hidden Marks || BTS || COMPLETED

50: Goodbye

The chatter throughout the large room buzzed in Sera's ears, as she turned her head towards someone who smiled excitedly at her, vaguely remembering her from the few Chemistry classes they took together. A big smile plastered on her face as she expressed her excitement and nervousness for this day, "It was almost like yesterday when we were freshmens! This is kind of insane," her voice was hushed so as to not interrupt the speaker.

Sera flashed the girl a smile, nodding her head, but didn't say anything as the girl's attention was quickly taken back to the speaker, and Sera too, turned around and pressed her back against the plastic chair.

It was almost laughable, how Sera understood what the girl was hinting at.

Her first day of college is something she will never forget.

The burning sensation of her marks and the gut wrenching feeling, is something she will never forget.

While there was plenty of time that Sera spent in pain throughout the four years, it didn't mean that all days were bad.

There were memories within these spam of four years that Sera will forever cherish, and ones that she will always try to forget. Sera has many regrets, yet the one thing that brought her the most pain, she could never bring herself to regret. That even as her marks fade day by day, she wouldn't regret ever meeting her soulmates. Even with the recently shed tears and unsuppressed sobs, mixed in with shared pains that brought them to their knees, Sera won't regret any of it.

Sera loves her soulmates.

How could she not love them?

They were all so different in their own ways, with their flaws, but Sera loved them nonetheless. Even if so many tears were shed because of them, it never once drowned out the love she felt for them.

That is also the reason why she needed to leave.

Before that love turns into hate.

Even the harsh words she spoke to them, she didn't know how to express her thoughts.

Sera didn't want to lie to them, but she ended up lying to Yoongi.

That night, after everything that had happened, did Sera finally allow the tears to fall in silence. Crawling up in her bed, and silently praying and begging for God, to mend not only just the boy's hearts, but hers as well. Clenching into her arms that were marked, she selfishly prayed for them to return to how they were, to stop fading and give her more time. All Sera wanted was more time. If she had simply had more time, she wouldn't have had to be so harsh towards her soulmates.

If given the opportunity, Sera would have done everything so differently.

Yet, there was no reversing time.

Sera had no more time.

So unless she wanted to spend everyday regretting everything, Sera needed to leave for America, to have these marks fully fade, and along with it, the small bond she still holds with them.

When her marks finally disappear and it feels as if her soul will never quaver again, can Sera ever truly embrace her soulmates again.

Until a mark finally stops dictating her relationship and happiness, can Sera ever learn to love herself, and in return, give back the love that was given to her.

America would give her the opportunities she never had in Korea. A place to finally breathe alone, without worrying about pleasing others and no longer having the creeping anxiety whispering in her ears. It'll allow her to finally grieve, shed the tears she has always thought she deserved no right to allow fall in the soil which her older brother rested under. To finally look at herself in the mirror, and find reasons why she should love herself and why she should be loved by others.