Once In A While

Chapter 2: Decision

The clock on the wall ticked loudly, a bothering, arrhythmic tick. I sat up, a thin ray of sun entering through the window. The thin, white sheets were tangled around my body, and it was at that moment that I felt bliss. But that wouldn't last long, for I knew I had a restless night before, and what I dreamt of wasn't that different from the jarring reality I was experiencing.

To my right, Jean was still sleeping, being exhausted from the chaos that was yesterday. So as not to disturb him, I quietly climbed down the ladder, and after putting my shoes on, I left the boys' dorm and carefully walked back to my own.

I was lucky enough not to have crossed paths with any higher-ups, and so I couldn't stop myself from sighing heavily once I closed the door behind me.

The ruckus I caused, which I did to be frank, made the girls who were up to look at me with a questionable look.

​​​​"Where were you?" Mikasa said to me as she was putting her uniform on, her eyes bored into mine.

Before I could make up an excuse, or just be honest about my whereabouts regarding last night, Sasha was quick to share her thoughts with the rest of us.

"Do you even need to ask her that? I think it's very obvious" The brunette said, and though we all had lost our fellow comrades just days ago, she had began to cheer up, though not returning to her original self fully.

"I don't know what you're talking about..." I said almost in a whisper, and grabbed a spare shirt from my belongings to change.

"(Y/n), which regiment will you be joining then? We didn't have time to talk about it...since.." Krista said, her big, blue eyes looking at me eagerly.

"The Corps." I said nonchalantly, and began to pack up the few things I had acquired during those years of training.

"Well I'll be damned, seems like almost everybody is joining the walking dead parade!" Ymir said, sitting up on her bunk bed.

"Don't call them that...it's not nice.." Krista was quick to reprimand her.

A strong urge to disassociate myself from everything creeped into the back of my mind. I stormed off the room, without explaining myself, aiming to go nowhere in particular.

After what seemed like a few minutes, I found myself back in the same place I was just about half an hour ago; the boys' dorm.

The door was swayed open, and a hoard of boys came out, sparing me sympathetic or apathetic glances, if any at all.

Jean showed up before me soon, and I looked up at him, smiling ever so slightly.

"When did you leave?"

"About half an hour ago, I didn't want to wake you up." I said as we walked towards the mess hall.

He nodded, and no words were shared until we sat down at an empty table.

"Are you nervous?" I asked him.

The expression in his eyes was hard to read.

"I am, but I'm ready to do whatever is needed to be done."

"I'm nervous myself...I mean, it's a huge mess, what we're getting ourselves into..." I trailed off and began eating my breakfast.

Soon, the once empty table was filled with everybody else; Connie and Sasha, arguing about food as they always do, Armin and Mikasa, who seemed to be missing their friend Eren, and lastly Krista and Ymir. Reiner, Berthold and Annie were nowhere to be seen.

We all ate our meals quietly, only the occasional outburst from Sasha or Connie breaking the silence.

We were now back in square one; on the training grounds, formatted in straight lines, just as we had been the first day of our training three years ago -only now we were a lot less than back then-.

A tall man with blonde hair was positioned in front of us. His aura gave off pride, dedication to his job.

"My name is Erwin Smith, I am the commander of the Survey Corps. Our regiment is, as you may know, dedicated to exploring titan territory, and finding a way to reclaim back the areas that were stolen from us! That being said, I understand if many of you choose to lead safe lives and choose either one of the other regiments. So now, I only call out to those who truly want to dedicate their lives to saving humanity from the brink of extinction!"

As expected, most cadets left the training grounds, including Annie, who I had heard wanted to join the military police.

I glanced momentarily at Jean, who was already looking at me, and gave him a reassuring look; this was the right choice, I wanted to tell him, we shouldn't have any regrets, and we would try our best to avenge our fallen comrades, and make him​​​​ proud.

"I see. All of you who stayed, you have earned my respect. You are now part of the survey corps!" said the commander, as he saluted.

We all mirrored his actions, and it was then when everyone of us realized that there was no turning back now.