Once In A While

Chapter 20: Home

I was back in the battlefield; surrounded by the corpses of the Survey Corps. I crawled my way around, not sure where I was heading to; but I dug my nails deep into the ground, soaked in blood as I cried out at the atrocious sight of the dead.

"No!" I yelled, jolting upright on my bed; it was a nightmare. Another one. It had been like this for a while now; one nightmare after the other, haunting my slumber. It all felt like a big, consecutive bad dream.

I looked around frantically, spotting Sasha still asleep in her bed. Mikasa wasn't there. I looked down at myself; I was clean, no traces of blood or gunpowder, dressed in my nightwear. Probably the girls must have helped me shower while I was unconscious. My memory of the few past days had been foggy. I didn't even know how long I was out for.

​​​​​​ Sasha grunted from her bed, and I looked over at her again; she was awake now.

"(Y/n)?" She said sleepily.

"You okay?" She asked when I didn't reply to her.

"I... Had a nightmare..." I managed to say, holding back my tears.

"I can tell... But you're up finally. Took your sweet time didn't you!" She said louder this time.

"What do you mean?"

"You've been out for at least three days. Kinda lost count honestly. Everyone's been worried sick, y' know. Especially horseface, though he doesn't want to admit it." She said, sitting upright as well, immediately wincing in pain. She still was injured.

"I don't remember much. Where's Mikasa? Is she okay?" I asked, weirded out by her absence.

"She's fine, just serving her punishment along with Eren for that mutiny of theirs."

"Their...what?"

"Oh god (Y/n) you have a lot of catching up to do! I would tell you but I just woke up and I'm starving honestly." She replied lazily and looked at the window beside our beds.

"Do you think they'll have served breakfast by now?" She pondered, her stomach growling.

"I don't even know what time it is." I said, bringing my palm to my forehead.

"I was talking to myself." She said and tried to get up.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, confused.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going to get myself food." She replied, struggling to put on her shoes hastily.

"You're injured, stay, can't someone else bring you food?"

"If I depend on the others I'll be dead before they feed me! They were always late the past days, today is the day!"

"Okay... I can't stop you." I laid back in defeat.

"You're not coming?" She gazed at me as she drew the curtains open, sunlight emitting through.

"I don't think I can... Face them all right now, that is." I explained.

"It would really mean a lot to them though, you know. They've all been pretty upset about you. Plus..." She didn't continue, and I raised an eyebrow at her.

"What? Go on." I motioned for her to continue.

"Don't tell horseface I told you this, but he literally came here every night to check up on you. Once he even fell asleep next to your bed and thank God Connie was here to bring me food and made him sleep in his own bed. It was hilarious though!" She smiled fondly at the memory.

"He did that?" I was surprised. I couldn't forget about our argument, and it was kind of a relief to know he was still here for me, even after that.