Ashley's Pov
Once I left Simon in the basement, I went back to my room. I checked what time it was on my phone and it was 5am. I went to bed and got cozy, but for some reason, I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking of Simon. 'I hate him, but kinda love him', 'I shouldn't love him, he cheated on me', 'He left me alone taking care of two kids', 'Does he even know thats, there his?' Many, and I mean many thoughts went through my head, sad ones and good ones. I couldn't stop thinking, it started to hurt my head. I got out of my bed, and just walked around my room. 'Cut, that help you stop thinking, and help the pain go away', 'He doesn't love you, nor YOUR kids.'
Thought were destroying me, but I didn't want to cut, and I wasn't. I went downstairs in a rush, my messy bun bouncing like crazy, and see Josh, just sitting on the kitchen counter, with some coffee and his phone, just scrolling through it. He looks up at me and sees me. He gets that concern look on his face, knowing him since secondary, he knows when I'm upset, or just doesn't want to speak to anyone. "You okay?" He asks, while putting his phone down and than taking a sip of his coffee. I gave a nod, knowing anxiety will be a bitch to me, and of course he noticed it. "You feel like hurting yourself don't you?" He said while getting off the counter. I nodded. "Well, how about you go for a run?, you always did that when we were young" he said while hugging me. "I have no one to watch the kids, and don't say you will, I don't want to disturb you with my problems" I said while getting a glass of water. "I will, I was about to ask you when you woke up, if I could use your computer, to edit a video real fast" he said. I took a sip of the water, than took a deep breath. "You sure?" I asks. "Yes, I'm sure, I don't need you hurting yourself anymore, and sure you wouldn't want your kids to do that either" he said while giving me a hug. "I guess, and thank you, I'm gonna go get ready and yes you could use my computer" I said, more relaxed. I ran to my room grad my outfit which were some black joggers, and a white crop top that had the three monkey emojis that barely showed my belly button, and some sneakers, I went into my bathroom, I would usually change in my room, but Josh started to edit, but I didn't mind. Once, I finished putting my outfit on, I put my hair in a high ponytail with my bangs still down, amd just for good looks I put some masacra on, and a little bit of lip gloss. I went back into my room to grab my ear buds and phone. "Thanks Josh, call if need anything" I said while hugging him behind. "Welcome, be safe" he said back to me. I gave a nod and went downstairs, seeing Cal. "Look at you, going for a run?" He said while putting his shoes on. "You going all ready?, I was gonna make breakfast for all of us, when I came back" I said while stretching. "Yeah, I have to go record a video with Harry and Callux" he said while getting his car keys. "Oh thats okay, drive safe, thanks for staying" Isaid while giving him a hug. "Thanks for having me" he said and with that he left. I finished stretching and than went for my jog.
It was such a beautiful jog. Haven't jog in a long time. It really took my mind off of things, this was truly better than self harm. Jogging was my favorite thing to do, before I went to university or did my homework. It made me relax, and more focus, and more awake. I remember that I was always first while running laps in gym class, or just for fun with my friends. I also remember some days ago that I would self harm to study for my exmas for college, and that reminds me, there next week! Hopefully nothing goes wrong. I really need to study for them, I'm also most done with my last year of university. I remember what I wanted to do for a job, is to be a veterinarian. They might not get a lot of money. But I prefer getting less money, but enjoy what I'm doing, than getting more money, but hating it and sucking at whatever else job. Plus some of the money I get from YouTube helps too. I lost my train of thought, because of someone calling my name.
I took one of my ear buds off, and see to girls screaming my name. "Your Ashley from YouTube that plays with the sidemen and oh my god your amazing and I love you so much" one of the girls said in a fangirling voice. "Thanks for watching my videos, and I love you to" I said while giving her a hug. "Could you sign my phone please?" The other girl said. "Of course!" I said, she passed me a marker, and I signed it. "Mine too please?!!" The other girl said in tears of happiness, I believe. I signed it, we took pictures and than I started to talk to them for a while, until I got a text from Josh..
I excused myself from the girls, so I could read the text.
Josh: Come home quick, Elliott isn't breathing so well, and he has a fever.
I didn't even want to reply, I said goodbye to the girls and ran back home as fast as I can. I was crying, my masacra running down my cheeks, but I didn't care. I needed to get home now. I was running out of breath, but didn't care. I need to know that my Elliott was okay. I soon turned right and see my house, I run even faster, untill I get inside. I quickly go upstairs and see Josh grabbing Elliott and Eleanor, and the diaper bag. "He isn't breathing good, we need to take him to the hospital." He said. I grad Elliott and he got Eleanor. We both ran down the stairs, him heading to my car, and me getting the car keys. I told him to drive, cause I needed to be with my kids. He drove as fast as he can, and soon in about 5 minutes, usually it would take 15 minutes to get to the hospital, we got there. I quickly jumped out of the car, and got him and rushed him to the emergency room. They took him in already knowing what's wrong with him, but they didn't let me go in with him. I tried my hardest to convince them, but they still said no. I gave up, I was to weak and out of breath. I than walked back into the waiting room, where Josh and Eleanor were. "They didn't let me go with him" I said while sitting down in a chair. "I'm sorry" he said and sat down next to me. "No, it's okay, it's my fault, for leaving the house" I told him. "Don't blam yourself, you needed the jog, you needed to get out the house, you needed to stop hurting yourself." He said. I gave a nod, but in my mind, I know it was my fault.
The nurse soon called my name to go ask me some questions, but I didn't need to go, Josh had to. I wasn't with Elliott when this happened. I asked Josh if he could go and answer the questions, and I'll take care of Eleanor. He said he will, which than I thanked him. He than went with the nurse and I stayed with Eleanor.
My phone than got a text, that made a noise, making everyone in the room look at me, but I ignored them and looked at the text. It was from Alex.
♡Alex: Hey Ash, where is you and Josh at? :( we brought food.
Ashley: At the hospital :'(
♡Alex: WHAT WHY ARE YOU OKAY
Ashely: I'm sort of, but Josh texted me and said Elliott wasn't breathing okay, and had a fever, so we took him to the hospital.
♡Alex: Aww, oh no, we are on our way.
Ashley: You guys don't need to come, have breakfast, I'll tell you what happens.
♡Alex: We are going, if you like it or not. Bye Loves you, see you soon.
Ashley: Love you too.
I put my phone away, and just tried to relax. An old lady, soon started to talk to me and complement Eleanor. "You have such a beautiful child" she said. "Thank you" I said back to her. "May I ask, why you are in the emergency room?" She asked me. "My son, her twin, wasn't breathing good, and was getting a fever, so than we took him here." I said trying my hardest not to cry. "Oh, I'm so sorry honey, haha, my husband was a twin too" she said "Haha, how long are you with your husband?" I asked, while getting a bottle for Eleanor. "Oh, 53 years, and they are the best years of my llfe" she said, while laughing a little. "Aww, may I ask, why are you here in the emergency room?" I asked. "Oh, my husband, wasn't breathing normally, he told me it was because he was sick, but better safe than sorry" she said, while giving a giggle. We talked a little bit more and soon the door open and an old man came out. "Oh, thats my husband" she said. The old man came up to her. "I told you it was just be being sick" he said to her while grabbing her hand, helping her get up from her chair. "Oh you and being right, but better safe than sorry" she said to him. "That's true, now lets go have dinner" he said to her, while grabbing her hand. "Have a nice day hun, hope your son get better" she said to me and than left with her husband. I just sat there and waited, for what next is gonna happen today.
Hope you enjoyed, next chapyer starts of with Simon's pov, anyways, in about like 8 or 10 chapters this might end, but just wondering if anyone wants me to still write, and who to write about, and what about, brother and sister, or couple drama, just ideas, so I could get started on it. BUT ANYWAYS HOPE YPU ENJOY MAKE SURE YOU FAVORITE IT! HAVE A GREAT DAY EVERYDAY LOVES YOU~IZZY
