Gusto Kita, Legit

Legit, Ninety Four

narration. September 01, 2021 | 04:10 PM

Avianna

I needed to breath heavily when I went out again. Hindi ko pa rin kasi mapigilan ang sarili sa kakaiyak. Masakit pa rin talaga na pakawalan ang taong naging parte na ng buhay mo.

We had a lot of plans. We built dreams together. We were supposed to do all of it together.

But now, it's over. We're over. Gano'n lang kabilis. Sa isang iglap, wala na siya sa buhay ko. Sa isang pag-uusap lang, naibalik ko na siya sa taong tunay na nagmamay-ari sa kaniya.

Muli akong lumingon sa ospital and my eyes landed at the rooftop area. I know he's still there and thinking about how a big part of me was taken away with him makes me wanna rethink.

It makes me wanna run back there and tell him that we doesn't need to let go of each other anymore. Parang gusto ko na lang kalimutan ang sakripisyo na sinasabi ko kanina. He can still be a father to his child while we are together, right? I can support him.

I can still love him and be with him rather than hurt myself by totally letting him go now.

"Nyx..." I whispered and was about to run back inside when someone suddenly pulled me to a tight embrace.

"Stop, Avianna. Don't go back." It was Alaric.

Because of what he said, mas lalo lang akong napaiyak. Napahagulgol na ako sa yakap niya.

Sobra na akong nasasaktan ngayon at hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko. I just want Nyx back in my life again.

"I know what you're planning but I also know that it's not you. You're not a selfish person, Avianna. Don't do it," he again said.

"But I need to, Alaric..." tugon ko rito. Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kaniya and there was a sad smile on his face as he shook his head no.

"You don't need to do it, Avianna. You don't need to be selfish just for your own sake. Hindi ka rin magiging masaya sa pagtagal ng panahon kasi hindi naman ikaw 'to eh. You'd rather be hurt than hurt others."

"Al..."

"You'll be fine, Avianna. Just calm down. You'll be fine. Everything will be fine."

Hindi ako kumibo. Yinakap lang naman ulit ako nito nang mahigpit and I could only pour my heart out by crying everything out.

When I was feeling fine already, Alaric brought me home and I knew that I needed a rest to function well again.

I just hope to forget all the pain when I wake up. I hope to forget Nyx and our situation for a while when I wake up.

I hope it happens. Kahit panandalian lamang.