I Hate You, I Love You

chapter twenty-two | forgiven

Recap...
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Noah started walking and then he spotted me. "Dixie?" He said. "N-Noah..." I said.
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(Still dixies pov)

"Where you here the whole time?" He asked me. "Y-yes I-I'm sorry.." I started to tear up. "Hey, it's fine" he placed his hands on my cheek and smiled. "It's ok"

I smiled and he wiped my tears. "D-did you mean it?" I said. "Mean what?" He acted dumb. He obviously knew what I was saying. "You love me?"

"Um.." "It's ok Noah..I understand if you're not ready. I'm gonna go back outside" I smiled lightly. "I love you" I hug noah and then start walking to the door.

"I love you too" he said. I turned around immediately "w-wait, what!?" I shouted excitedly. I dropped to my knees and started crying.

"Oh goodness" he laughs and walks to me. "Don't cry bub.." "b-bub?" I said as I looked up at him. "Y-you love me?" I stood up and faced him.

"Yes I do. I love you" he wipes my tears with his thumb. "I- omg" I hugged noah as tight as I could. Leaning my head on him, crying happy tears.

"N-Noah" I said. "What's wrong?" He said. "I promise I won't cheat on you ever again.." he laughs at what I just said, "ok and I forgive you" he smiles.

I love life. I'm so fucking happy. I fucking love life.

"Really?" I smile. "Really" he repeats. "We should go back outside.." I said. "No no no" he said. "why?"

"Because.." he placed his hand on my cheek, rubbing it with his thumb. Smiling at me. Leaning closer to my face and placing his lips on mine. Fireworks exploded in my stomach. It felt like our first kiss.

"I missed that so much" I said, placing my forehead on his. "What do you miss even more though? And I know you miss it" he smirked. I knew what he was talking about.

"Noah!" I playfully slapped his chest. "Although it's partially true" I giggled. "You're so gorgeous baby" he said, kissing my head. "I'm so happy right now" "me too" he smiled.

"Wanna go swimming?" Noah asked. "Um sure. Do you have a bathing suit?" I asked. "Yeah I left mine here a year ago" he laughed. "Ok let's go get changed!" I giggled and started to walk upstairs.

Then Noah slapped my ass "hey!" I turned around "that hurt!" I giggled. "You're so cute" he laughed.

We got upstairs to my room. "Your bathing suit is in my closet. Find it" "ok" he said, walking to my closet. Eventually he found it and came back out.

"I found it. It was in your underwear drawer" he laughed. "Not funny mr." I giggled and took my shirt off. "Woah baby" he said. I giggled.

"What're you doing?" He asked. "Uh..changing?" "In front of my eyes?" He laughed. "Yeah...if that's a problem I can go-" "no, stay here"

"Ok" I giggled, continuing to take my clothes off. I was now completely naked and Noah was already in his bathing suit. I was about to put my bottoms on but then i noticed stretch marks.

Noah noticed I was sad so he walked over to me and placed his hands on my waist. "What's wrong baby?" He asked. I looked up at him with tears in my eyes.

"Hey hey, don't dry. Tell what's wrong"  I walk to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. "I'm so ugly" "no the fuck you're not!" Noah said immediately.

"you're absolutely gorgeous baby" "no...my boobs are so small, I mean...like I have no boobs. I want to be like other girls who have decent sized boobs for a 19 year old girl.." I looked down.

"Baby, first of all, your boobs are perfect. Not to be a pervert but I love them. I don't care if they're big or small and you shouldn't care either. I'm not using you for your body. I love you for you. Not what you look like. Everything about you is perfect. I'm amazed by how perfect your body is" Noah said to me

Noah smiled and kissed my forehead. I looked back in the mirror "but..." I touch my stretch marks on my legs, hips and boobs.

"And what about those?" He says. "These are beautiful. I love every single one of them" "but they're so ugly" I added in.

"No they're not! Dixie, stop talking bad about yourself. It breaks my heart. You're perfect. Every inch of you is perfect in my eyes, and hopefully that's all that matters to you. I'm not in love with anyone else in this world. I chose you and I chose you for a reason." Noah said, sweetly.

I smiled big and hugged him. "I love you bubba. Thank you for making me feel better about myself"

Noah picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his torso. "Of course baby. I love you so much" he smiled at me. "I missed hearing those words come out of your mouth" "and I missed saying those words" he smiled again.

"Now go get your bathing suit on and let's go swimming because we've been up here for a while now" Noah chuckled. "Ok" i responded.

I changed and we headed downstairs. Everyone was still outside. I hadn't realized how long we were upstairs because when we went outside the sun was almost setting.

"Where were you guys?" Addison came up to me. "Upstairs talking and changing" I said. "Mhm" she smirked "you sure you weren't making baby's?" "we were not doing that!" I laughed.

"Come on baby" nosh said, already in the pool. "Ok I'm coming" I smiled and got in. "Well that's new. Are you guys dating again?" Char asked. "No" I said.

-

It was now time to light fireworks off. I was super excited but also really tired. I just wanted to fall asleep in Noahs arms.

"I'm so tired" I leaned on Noah. "I'm sorry baby. You can go to sleep soon, ok?" He said while stroking my hair. Butterflies. "Ok" I yawned.

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A/N:
hi everyone. i haven't been feeling the greatest these past 2-3 days but hopefully my cough will go away soon. i took a covid test on Friday, no covid! phew.

Have an amazing day/night<3

Word count: 1069