Love's A Real Thing Right?

Chapter 44: But it was love wasn't it? What I feel for Aurora?

Sylvia sighed, "Well relationships are just hard Ace."

"Relationships aren't tough Syl. They're only tough when one person is working on it. Two people can move a couch really easy, one person can't move it at all. If you're in a relationship rule one; stop competing, his success is your success, and your success is his success. Rule two, there is no equality in a relationship, you're both there to serve. You're in the service industry, when you're in a relationship you're in a band and when you're in a band you have roles that you play in the band."

"So then what kind of girl do you want Ace?"

"I just want someone to look at me and know that I am the one. I want them to tell their mum about me all smiling and happy. I want them to hold me high and I want to feel safe in their arms. I don't want to be dropped again. Because no one in this world has ever truly prioritized me. I'm always just an option, the second choice, the backup. I am forever not good enough. And you know what, no matter how good I am to them doesn't mean they'll treat me the same. No matter how much they mean to me doesn't mean they'll value me the same. Sometimes the people that you love the most, turn out to be the people you can trust the least."

"So then you don't want to be with anyone again?"

"No, I want someone that is loyal. But I don't just mean in the sense of you're not gonna go run of with any random Chris. What I also want is someone who understands that disagreements are going to happen, but what we both know is what we have is stronger than that. A disagreement won't break us. Because I will value her more than being right or winning and I just want her to value me the same way. To see me just like I see her, as an irreplaceable other person with different opinions and views. Who we're willing to do whatever it takes to keep that person in our lives and make sure everyone in our lives knows that and respects our significant other."

"So if you meet someone like that you'll move on from Aurora?"

Ace stopped for a moment, "Nope, I don't think I will."

"But- you- you- just- You just said."

"I know what I said, but when you love someone, you work it out, you don't just throw it away. You have to be careful with it. Becaue you might never get it again. No, I'm not going to lose feelings. No, I'm not going to find somone better. I've already made up my mind, I want her and only her. No one else....because to me, she's my kind of perfect."

Sylvia looked Ace dead in his eyes and in an annoyed tone replied, "Really Ace, that's the conclusion you came to? After all that talking, after all the you feeling like a second choice, you being hurt and wanting to be happy. All that talking. That's what you have to say? You don't wanna move on from her?"

Ace flinched a little and in a low melancholy tone he followed up, " I know it sounds stupid Syl, but you know the quote, 'Kimi dayo kimi nanda yo egao wo kureta namida mo hikaru nara ryuusei ni naru' That's what Aurora was to me, she said she'd be a ball of light and light up my darkness. And with that she made my darkness beautiful. And part of me is scared that I'll be okay without her and then I'll never see her again. Something about needing her is comforting. Because what if one day I see her happy with someone else and even though I don't need her anymore I'm jealous?"

"That's a beautiful quote Ace, but you have absolutely no reason to be jealous. And yeah, you know what, you're allowed to be sad I mean let's face it, break ups suck. But what exactly will you be jealous for? You're jealous because she found someone that isn't better than you ? You're jealous that she found someone that can never treat her the way you treated her? Or are you jealous that she left you and never appreciated you in the first place? Because Ace, remember at the end of the day you didn't lose her. She lost you. And I don't care how long she is with the other person. She will end up regretting leaving you trust me. And why would you go back running to her Ace? Don't you want her to treat you better? Running back to her after she hasn't change would just get you treated the same way. The only time you should ever go back to her is if she changes and is willing to treat you better. I mean how hard is it to treat someone how they want you to treat them?" Sylvia assured Ace.