Friends or lovers (jemilyxreader)

Chapter 10

TW: self harm

y/n POV:

It's been 8 weeks since I've been home from work because I lost my baby . I haven't been myself, I had 5 empty bottles of tequila and vodka in the living room and in my bedroom and bathroom. The team messaged me asking how i was doing and I messaged back " fine". I even had empty tubs of ice cream everywhere. There was no point in being alive. I grabbed a new bottle of tequila and ibuprofen I took two ibuprofen and drank it with tequila, I grabbed a razor blade, I took it and sliced my wrist.

*phone rings *

Aaron - hey y/n umm it's been about 8 weeks and well I know you want to be alone but I'm worried about you please open up .

Y/n- Aaron!!! I'm sorry please help me.

Aaron's POV:

I wasn't sure if y/n needed help so I opened her front door with a spare key she gave me. I called out no answer I walked upstairs and her bedroom was unlocked, I walked in but she was nowhere , I noticed the bathroom door was cracked open as I looked inside all I saw was      y/n's helpless body on the floor. I ran checking for a pulse it was there but it was weak.  "y/n stay with me please, I need you I———I love you y/n." I rushed her to the hospital calling the team on my way there. They rushed over. 

y/n POV:

There I was in a hospital bed. Was I dead! Or was I alive? I couldn't tell. I slowly opened my eyes . And I felt someone holding my hands. I looked and it was Aaron. The last thing I remember was him saying he loves me . Do I love him? I mean I think I do. Actually I do love him.

In the hospital room it was just the two of us. "Aaron?" " y/n ..omg y/n let me go get the team" "no please" "why is everything okay " yeah it's just, I love you Aaron and I would like to try again. If you want to." " y/n are you sure " yes Aaron."

Three weeks later

y/n POV:

It's been three weeks since I was in the hospital and I'm doing much better now. The whole team took care of me, dropping by as often as they could. Last week I went back to work and since then we've been very busy, we've had case after case but I honestly don't mind because I was kinda tired of being home all the time.

We were on the jet making are way back from a pretty heavy case. Rossi asked if we wanted to go to the bar to let off some steam. Everyone agreed and Aaron mentioned that we could get as drunk as we wanted because we had the next 2 days off.

We got off the jet and all made our way home to get ready to go to the bar. I put on a red bodycon dress that hugged all my curves perfectly. I did my hair and put on some light makeup before heading out. And for the first time in weeks I actually felt like myself. Even though I didn't wanna get black out drunk I still took an Uber just in case. By the time I got to the bar the whole team was already there and I made my wan towards them.

"Wow y/n you sure do know how to dress" Morgan commented while whistling and Penelope hit him on the arm. Aaron looked me up and down and smirked "y/n you look great". Then Emily looked me up and down and smirked and something flashed in her eye but I couldn't tell what it was. "Thanks guys" "I'll be back, I'm getting us all drinks" and with that Morgan walked away to get the drinks.

After I couple drinks I was pretty tipsy and by that point Penelope and Morgan were dancing together and they seemed to be enjoying themselves. While I was looking at the dance floor, emily touched my arm "hey y/n do you wanna dance" "um yeah sure why not" what no one knew is that ever since I got to the bau I've kinda had a crush on Emily and honestly on jj too but I tried to ignore it because I knew I didn't have a chance with either of them despite the kiss i shared with jj several months ago.

Emily and I were dancing and out of the corner of my eye I saw jj starring at us with a pissed off look on her face. I thought it was weird why would jj be pissed of that em and I are dancing. Unless there's something going on between them. I decided not to ask em just in case I was wrong.

At one point Emily had noticed that jj was pissed and staring at us. She put her hand on my face and gripped my chin. She pulled me in for a kiss and at first i didn't kiss her back because I was shocked. After a moment I leaned into the kiss and put my hands on either side of her face. I can't believe that I'm kissing THE emily prentiss right now.

After a couple moments we both pulled back for air and we just looked at each other. "What was that for em" "don't question it, just enjoy it". I stayed silent and we kept dancing for a pretty long time. Later we had gone back to where the team was. Spencer had gone home and so did Penelope and Morgan. Aaron had left not much later because he said he had an emergency. jj hadn't really drank that night because she had brought her car. She said she was going home and em was going with her because she was pretty drunk. "Wait jj let's drop y/n off at home" "oh no it's fine I can just get a cab" "nonsense, jj can take you right jj" "uh yeah sure". We all made our way to her car and she dropped me off at home.

I walked in and went straight to my bed. After a couple minutes I got up to take off my make up and to change into different clothes. I thought about what had happened earlier with me and em. I really wanted to ask her about it but I wasn't sure how. Then I thought about the kiss I shared with jj. Ugh there both such good kissers and I would kill to kiss either of them again. But then I thought about how I told Aaron we could try again. Did I really want to I mean I want kids but do I want them now. I needed to talk to Aaron too but I wanted to think about all this when I'm sober that way I could decide what I would say to both Emily and Aaron.

I decided to just sleep it off and tomorrow I would deal with all these thoughts.