The Accused (A Series #1)

Chapter Fifty-One

"I was drunk, I wasn't on my right mind. I was overspeeding. And the next thing I knew, I crashed with a taxi ahead of me. I was conscious the whole time while they brought the mother and her child to the hospital. I was immediately taken care of but I refused assistance. I needed to go..."

Hindi magkamayaw sa malakas na pagkabog ang dibdib niya sa mga salitang lumalabas sa bibig ng kausap. He was looking at her intently but it was the pain in his eyes that almost made her stop him.

"Why were you drunk driving? You know it's dangerous!" Hindi niya alam kung saan nanggaling ang biglang pagkainis sa narinig. He was drunk driving and he met an accident. He could have died!

"I needed to rush and I was drinking when I got the call."

"What call? And where would you go?" What made it so important that he almost got himself killed?

"To you..." He said like a whisper, she almost did not hear it.

She froze on her spot. He averted his gaze down as if afraid of her to see the emotions in his eyes. But it was not the reason why she felt her heart stopped working for a second, it was what he said.  Questions flooded her head but she did not have the courage to blurt it all out. Nanghihina siya, ni hindi niya maibuka ang bibig para magsalita.

Why did it have to be about her again?

Silence took over once more. This time, it was a painful silence that made her want to cry. She just knew that she felt hurt even without knowing the whole story. She was right, it was because of her again.

"It was a false lead," he said after a while with his eyes still on the floor. "Days after I woke up from the fucked up decisions I made, I went back to the precinct. But you were not there, and it made me mad. So mad, I could almost see darkness everywhere. I did not know what to do. I hired investigators, but all it gave me were false leads. I tried reaching out to your mother but she would not even talk to me. I went around searching for you hoping I could take back everything I did. If I have to spend my whole life suffering for what I did, I would do it."

He gradually brought his head up. The moment his eyes met her, a single tear fell from her. There was affliction in his eyes as he watched her shed a tear. Her heart did not want to acknowledge his words as all of them were tearing every bit of her. Her heart was crumpling painfully as he finally showed her what he felt all along. The look of torment, regret, and despair playing all at the same time in his eyes took her breath in the most agonizing way.

"But I wasn't sure. I was not sure if I would live long to suffer because when you left, it took the life out of me. I wasn't even sure about now as to how I lived all those years battling with my fears and regret. Everyone around kept on pushing me to live the way I did before but I did not even have the single knowledge of how to regain myself back. I was not functioning well, the company... it was threatened with bankruptcy, and I almost, almost failed you again when your dad's company suffer for my negligence..."

Dad's company... right, he had it. He was not lying when he said he'd have it as a payment for what she did before.

"I thought of ending it all but I did not have the heart to do so kasi paano ang anak ko? Paano kung nalaman niyang wala na ako nang hindi man lang niya naranasang alagaan ng tunay na ama? I did even have the heart to be selfish in thinking about myself." He shortly chuckled mockingly at himself.

"Paano ako? Paano pag wala na ako, paano ko pa mahahawakan yung anak ko? Paano ko pa siya maipagtatanggol sa mga gustong umaway sa kanya? How could I attend on her special days? How could I have the chance to be a father to my child if I decide to be swallowed by the troubles I made for myself?