The meaning of protecting you with my life

Long wait once again

Jiang Yanli was sitting by Wei Wuxian's side just as many other times this past two weeks. Wen Qing had warned them that even with Lan Wangji's healing music and all the care they could provide including regular transfers of spiritual energy, her brother's recovery would be very slow. She had been right. It was already two weeks and Wei Wuxian had yet to awaken. Although he was proclaimed out of danger three days ago, it was now still the matter of time for him to open his eyes.

Everyone was mortified as they kept vigil by Wei Wuxian's bed in case he, by some miracle and very impossibly so, which had always been his forte, woke up and no one was with him. They did not want to leave his side for even a single moment and it always took a lot of persuasion for each person to go take some rest themselves. Just as Jiang Yanli had coerced the Second Jade into doing.

She could see that Lan Wangji felt perhaps the worst of them all. After two weeks, she thought that she had learned to read his minimal expressions quite well. Even though everyone always said that Lan Wangji's face was expressionless, it was in fact far from truth. It was just that his emotions were more often than not conveyed by his eyes and only minute movements of facial muscles which were gone before anyone could notice them if one was not looking closely enough.

And the most telling sign of all, if she would doubt Lan Wangji's feelings towards her brother – which she did not at this point – was when she had come to take her shift and had overheard the Second Jade calling Wei Wuxian his soulmate. She had already guessed that there had been something much bigger between the two of them, that they were much closer than just friends, so it was not too unexpected for her to confirm that Lan Wangji was in fact in love with her brother.

It was a good thing too since Wei Wuxian needed someone to take care of him and remind him that his life had a lot of value beside laying it down for the sake of her family and the Yunmeng Jiang sect in general. Her brother needed someone to value him when he often did not value himself enough. And it seemed like Lan Wangji could be the perfect choice.

So Jiang Yanli did her best to be nice to the Second Jade and encourage him to spend as much time as possible with Wei Wuxian. All the while making sure that he ate and slept properly. It would not do if Lan Wangji collapsed because of taking care of his loved one, it would not be too good if Wei Wuxian saw that when he would wake up.

Jiang Yanli looked at her brother's face. Fortunately, it was no longer deathly pale, some colour returned to it already even though it was still not the tanned and smiling face she wanted to see. Wei Wuxian was now also breathing easily enough and Jiang Yanli would have not believed until now that she could feel this relieved while watching someone's chest rise and fall regularly. But here she was, celebrating even the tiniest signs of recovery that her brother would present.

She reached out and brushed a stray strand of hair away from Wei Wuxian's face. Who knew how it had gotten there in the first place when her brother only laid unmoving all the time. Nevertheless, it was better this way, he looked more peaceful when she could see his whole face, unobstructed by any obstacles.

She sighed; she hated this. She hated to see her brother this hurt and not knowing when he would wake up. She hated not being able to help in any meaningful way. All she could do was wait. Just as all the previous times when she had been left behind by her brothers and could only see their leaving backs. She could only ever wait for them patiently and treat their injuries and sooth their worries once they would come back to her.

It was the same now, Wei Wuxian had gone away somewhere she could not reach and all she could do was sit here by his bedside and do nothing but wait. It was mortifying truly. Never knowing when and in what kind of condition her brothers would come back was the worst. Still, she never abandoned her duty and waited for them with prepared bandages and medical salves and with a hot pot of her Lotus root pork rib soup that they loved so much.

Not being able to fight alongside them or keep up with them, this was really the only thing that she could do. This and praying for their safe return.

Suddenly, the door opened and since Jiang Yanli had not been expecting it, she flinched a little and immediately turned around on her chair, ready to shield Wei Wuxian with her body should the unannounced intruder be a kidnapper or an assassin. She knew the guards outside of the door would not have let anyone pass but a number of things could have happened and her brother could be in danger.

Luckily, her worries proved to be unfounded she realized when she spotted another set of purple Yunmeng Jiang sect robes, just like her own, and recognized the face of her mother. Until today, she was still surprised and saddened every time she saw her.

Yu Ziyuan had changed a lot. Where she had previously been all edges and steel, there was something soft and emotional nowadays. It was not visible when she was training disciples or helping with sect affaires. However, it was clear whenever they were alone in a family circle or when she as much as mentioned Wei Wuxian. Her mother was still blaming herself for what had happened to Wei Wuxian and for what he had become. Since her now acknowledged son remained unconscious, she could not apologize nor make it up to him and it was eating away at her.

And the worst of all, she seemed to age several years whenever she stepped inside Wei Wuxian's room. It was almost as if she was fearing the moment she would have to face him at last but at the same time was hoping that he would be awake every single time she came to check on him. Jiang Yanli could relate, she had similar thoughts although she was sure that she had hopefully never made her brother feel as unwelcomed in his home as her mother had had.

Nevertheless, she had much to apologize for as well. During her sleepless nights at Wei Wuxian's side, she realized that although she had never showed her brother any animosity herself, it was just as bad to not stand up for him and always brushing away his own feelings. She had never been fooled by his smile but she had deliberately chosen to ignore a lot of times when she should have stood up for him, be it against her mother or Jiang Cheng.

She had also erred, they all did. Despite having already agreed and decided that from now on, they would protect Wei Wuxian in turn and would finally make him welcomed and cared for as they should have done ever since Jiang Fengmian had brought the small child to Lotus Pier, she was afraid that they would never be able to make it up to him for all those years when he did not have any place in their family, not really.

"A-Li, go take a rest. I will call for you should there be any changes."

Her mother's voice threw her out of her morose thoughts. It was only then that she realized how tired she was. At first, she wanted to protest but one look into her mother's eyes convinced her otherwise.

Yu Ziyuan had once again that look on her face. The one full of love and worry for her children, all three of them. Jiang Yanli was only slowly getting used to Yu Ziyuan finally acting as a true caring mother to all of them. But it was a nice change and she would never comment on it, she would just gladly accept it.

Moreover, she knew that her mother wanted to spend some time alone with Wei Wuxian. She always talked to him as if he would wake up any faster if he knew what was waiting for him here. And perhaps he would, who knew.

Jiang Yanli only stood up from her chair and smiled at the other: "Mother, I leave Wei Wuxian to you. Good night."

Without another word, she left her brother's room and went to her own where her fiancé was already waiting for her with dinner prepared on a low table. She smiled at him as well and sat down, letting herself be pampered by Jin Zixuan.