The meaning of protecting you with my life

Be gentle

Jiang Cheng was running as soon as one of the junior Yunmeng Jiang sect disciples informed him that Wei Wuxian was awake again. He wanted to see him while his eyes were open and there was no stiffness on his face, he wanted to see him smile as he had always been. Always but during the war and the rescue operation to the Nightless City palace. The images still plagued Jiang Cheng's mind until today.

He had to make sure that his brother was finally with them again. Not only his unconscious body, but his mind and heart as well. He wanted his sibling back.

When he arrived to Wei Wuxian's room, he was completely out of breath and no one would be able to tell that he was in fact the Yunmeng Jiang sect leader. His appearance must have been dishevelled and his cheeks all red because of both excitement and worry. He could only hope that Wei Wuxian would be in a better mood than when he had woken up the first time and cried. He had not believed his sister even for a second, he knew that his brother had not been so happy to shed tears.

He hesitated in front of the door, suddenly not sure that he could bear it if his brother would be broken and in need of gentle and kind words. He had never known how to give those. Anger and sharp tongue were more his way of doing things. He had never needed to speak gently as he knew that Wei Wuxian understood he cared even without that. They had always been bickering and Jiang Cheng threw all his anger onto his brother to hide his embarrassment and love. It had been enough until now.

But would it be enough even in the future? Wei Wuxian had been through a lot lately and Jiang Cheng did not believe he knew his brother anymore. He had after all disregarded him and pushed him too hard during the Sunshot campaign, still unaware of the fact that he was missing his golden core back then. Would Wei Wuxian forgive him for behaving so angrily and making him a scapegoat of his stress from having to step up as the Yunmeng Jiang sect leader?

Suddenly, Jiang Cheng did not know if he wanted to face his brother this soon. He had thought he had already made peace with himself but clearly, he was still very much unprepared. He was afraid that he would never be able to face his brother again, nor apologize to him and make him feel loved in a proper way. Wei Wuxian would now need a lot of support and Jiang Cheng was starting to doubt that he was the right person to provide it. He had already failed so many times in the past too.

It was weighing heavily on his mind that Wei Wuxian had lost his golden core while protecting him and he had never noticed until he had been explicitly told. The rational part of his mind knew that he could have not done anything differently and that it had in fact not been his fault that his brother was now not able to cultivate spiritual energy anymore. However, he could not shake off the feeling that he should have at least noticed. It was like he had not been paying attention to Wei Wuxian's suffering and silent pleas all this time. It was truly mortifying.

Jiang Cheng massaged his temples to get rid of his budding headache. The disciples guarding the door were looking at him with strange eyes but Jiang Cheng did not mind it right now. He found it impossible to straighten his back and look like a true sect leader, confident and always knowing what to do. Right now, he felt like a teenager who was struggling with everything, not knowing what he was supposed to do in the simplest of situations, not knowing how to face his own brother. He was at a loss.

His train of thought was only interrupted when someone put their hand on his shoulder and squeezed lightly. He turned on his heel, surprised. Was someone here to attack him? Or Wei Wuxian? He was immediately ready to fight, summoning his experience from the wartime. His body knew how to defend itself.

Luckily, it was only Jiang Yanli with a sweet smile and a mildly startled expression. She immediately let go of his shoulder and looked apologetic, surely realizing that she had frightened him. Jiang Cheng felt ashamed of his reaction. He had been too much on edge to properly assess the situation. It was not like an assassin would just stand there with his hand on his shoulder like that. He had overreacted and he knew it.

The angel his sister was, she did not wait for his apology and rescued him from the uncomfortable silence: "A-Cheng, why are you standing here? Lan Wangji had sent word that A-Xian is awake. We should go inside and greet him properly before he would fall asleep again. Remember what Wen Qing had said, A-Xian will be able to only stay awake for a limited amount of time for a while.

And look," Jiang Yanli lifted her other hand and showed him a basket where he was sure her famous Lotus root pork rib soup was, "I have brought food for him. We cannot have it getting cold."

Jiang Cheng nodded, the lump in his throat was not letting him speak and he found out he was not able to swallow it down just yet. He stepped aside to let his sister open the door and stroll inside. He took a deep breath, bracing himself before entering as well.

His eyes were immediately drawn to the bed and to the sitting figure of his brother. He was overjoyed seeing him awake, his worries temporarily forgotten.

Wei Wuxian also seemed to have noticed him and he greeted him with a wide smile: "Hello there, Jiang Cheng. It is good to see you are alright."

His brother's voice was hoarse but there were happy sparkles in his eyes. It was almost as if he had never suffered anything worse than a few scratches in his life. He was just as bright as he had been before the fall of Lotus Pier. Jiang Cheng's heart overflowed with relief even when that idiot was once again not caring about himself and instead being happy that the Yunmeng Jiang sect leader was fine.

He could not hold himself back and he quickly crossed the room, tears gathering in his eyes, he scoped Wei Wuxian into a bone crushing hug. He was so happy to have his brother back!

He buried his face in Wei Wuxian's shoulder and squeezed even tighter, wanting to make sure that Wei Wuxian was indeed real, alive and breathing in his arms. He would never be able to forget that moment when his brother's heart stopped beating and how terrible the realization that he could never see him again had been. Now he was just glad to be able to confirm that Wei Wuxian was with them again.

Like in a dream, he could hear his brother's laughter ringing through the whole room and could feel his hand gently patting his back before returning the hug.

He only realized that he could be potentially hurting Wei Wuxian when Jiang Yanli gently reminded him: "A-Cheng, careful."

He immediately loosened his arms, suddenly remembering that his brother had just recovered and that he had no golden core either. Yes, he had to be gentle with him now. It was something which did not come easily to him but which he would have to remember and do from now on. Long lost would be the mock fights between them, he could not dare to become too absorbed in them and hurt his fragile brother.

"It is fine, it is fine, Shijie. I am alright."

Wei Wuxian laughed again but Jiang Cheng could tell from the way his brother's muscles relaxed under his hands that he had done the right thing. Of course Wei Wuxian would never tell them if he was hurting, he would just have to learn how to figure it out on his own. He would have his work cut out for him for a while.

Nevertheless, he did not mind anything if it meant Wei Wuxian would stay by his side. He would be careful and he would take care of him as his brother had done so all this time. It was now Jiang Cheng's turn to act responsively and protectively. Their roles had reversed; he was the stronger one from now on if only physical health wise. He knew he could not measure to Wei Wuxian's use of demonic cultivation of course.