The meaning of protecting you with my life

Love and care

Lan Wangji was sitting at his husband's side inside the moving carriage. The journey to Lotus Pier had been uneventful thus far and he was happy to receive Jiang Yanli's invitation to come inside.

He was grateful to his brother for providing protecting during their travel. Not that Lan Xichen had mentioned anything to him but he could have sworn that he had caught glimpses of white robes here and there, sometimes in the dead of a forest, high above in the sky or mingled into the crowd in the towns they had passed by. They never came to view too obviously but it was clear that someone was keeping a protective hand over them because Lan Wangji had assumed they should have encountered some troubles already. It had been inevitable with how angry Jin Guangshan seemed when he could not have got Wei Ying for himself.

They never stayed in towns though, they deemed it too dangerous to stop moving in such populated areas where possible dangers coming from people could lurk on every step of the way. They had enough provisions to last them for the whole journey and they were still very much used to sleeping outside from the just ended war. There was no problem even for the ladies since Jiang Yanli and Wen Qing never left Wei Ying's side and were sleeping inside the carriage with him. Everyone knew that there was no possibly of indecency with Wei Ying being still unconscious.

Despite the journey going smoothly, Lan Wangji could not stop worrying about his husband. He had already known that Wei Ying would most probably not wake up this soon, not with everything that had happened to him, but it was still far from reassuring. His husband's face looked as pale as ever and there were no signs at all of any colour returning to it even when Lan Wangji was doing his best to pass and circulate his own spiritual energy. Was this all he could do when Wei Ying had no golden core anymore?

He had not asked how or when exactly that happened. He did not need to know and it would have also been very rude to inquire behind Wei Ying's back. If his husband would want to tell him one day, he would gladly listen, but he would not try to discover anything on his own. It was not important why or how it happened, the sole fact that his Wei Ying was now so fragile and in need of protection was enough to know for him. He had to do his best.

He would also have to be patient. He had heard stories about how traumatized cultivators were when they had lost their golden cores. Even he had been beside himself and feeling not right in his skin when his spiritual energy had been temporarily sealed. And it was not even comparable to the emptiness he could feel inside Wei Ying every time he had tried to feel for his spiritual energy and golden core, unconsciously seeking the warmth which he would never again find.

It was possible that Wei Ying would wake up disoriented and perturbed. Perhaps he had not even known until now that his golden core was not there anymore? Since he had used resentful energy for a long time now, perhaps he had not had any need for reaching for spiritual energy at all.

It was a hope that Lan Wangji could not stop but he knew very well that it was a very improbable one too. It was more likely that Wei Ying knew about his missing golden core but had been too busy winning the war for them so he had not had time to process this fact. He would probably only start getting used to the situation upon waking up. And Lan Wangji would be there for him during that time, he would make sure of it.

Lan Wangji was disturbed out of his thoughts by Jiang Yanli's gentle voice: "Second Young Master Lan, I think this is enough. You need to conserve your energy for the travel." The implication of that statement, although not said aloud was clear; he needed to have enough spiritual energy to be able to fight in case of an attack, however unlikely that was at this point.

Reluctantly, he let go of Wei Ying's wrist and looked down at the other's unconscious form. It was a little relief that his husband looked this peaceful in his sleep, hopefully he had no nightmares and he was not feeling any pain in the dreamland. Lan Wangji would not be able to bear the knowledge that he could not do anything for Wei Ying if the other would be suffering right now.

Jiang Yanli reached towards her brother from the other side and caressed his hair gently. "He looks like he is only sleeping, does he not? He does not look like he had been dying just a few days ago. I wish I could do more for him..."

Her voice disappeared and Lan Wangji could have sworn that he had heard a suppressed sob which had made it impossible for her to continue. He was not sure the question had been meant for him or if it had been just a rhetorical one, an internal sigh said aloud. Still, he thought that Jiang Yanli could use some kind words of reassurance. He was not one to be too fluid with his words, but he was trying his best.

"Maiden Jiang takes good care of her brother. Wei Ying knows he is loved."

Jiang Yanli's head shot up and she looked positively bewildered. But then, she seemed to have gotten over her surprise when she subbed at her eyes discreetly with the hem of her robes and smiled at Lan Wangji.

"Thank you, Second Young Master Lan, I hope that is true." After a second of apparent internal deliberation she added: "You know, I am not sure A-Xian is convinced he is loved. For the longest time now, he had always put other's well-being above his own, sacrificing his own happiness in the process. I hope that he would understand that he could be selfish too sometimes. But perhaps with you here, he would finally be able to relax a bit. I can tell that he has come to think of you as a good friend."

That was not what Lan Wangji wanted to hear, he wanted to be more to Wei Ying than just a friend, but he would take things slowly. After all, he had never let the other know about his affection which he had only truly realized during the time Wei Ying had been missing for three months.

"Mn," he hummed in agreement.

Then, he realized that since Jiang Yanli was now basically part of his family – he really needed to make that known, but only after he would confirm with Wei Ying that the other was returning his feelings, otherwise, he would just not mention this anymore –, even though she did not know it just yet, they should let go of formalities between them. And even if they ended up not being a family in the end because his husband would choose to annul the marriage he had had no idea about, that would be fine too. Jiang Yanli has become someone Lan Wangji respected.

"Lan Wangji," he proposed resolutely and was happy when Jiang Yanli seemed to have understood his proposition.

She smiled gently and bowed a little to him, giving him the option to call her by her name in return. "Lan Wangji it is then. You can call me Jiang Yanli from now on. Let us take care of A-Xian to the best of our abilities together."