I'll Always Love You - A Romanogers Fanfic

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NATASHA'S POV

I'm in the bathroom looking at myself in the mirror.
My body is littered with hickeys. Everywhere.
I run my hand over my left boob. A big, sore, dark purple hickey, that I don't even know when was made.

Steve and I have been fighting all the time for the past few weeks, and every time has led to angry sex to the point where I can barely walk.
We've been fighting about our plan that we still aren't very clear about, we've been fighting about a short mission I went on. It has gotten to the point where we're even fighting over whose pile the reports are in, and that of course led to sex on the dining table, messing up the piles even more.

We have barely talked. At least not about our relationship.
Because every single time we try, I end up bent over Steve's desk or against the wall or we end on the floor.
It's a lot. I mean it's amazing sex, but...I can't believe I'm the one saying this, but we need to talk at this point.

I put on a bra and limp out of the bathroom, catching Steve's gaze, but I'm determined that now is talking, and not sex.
"You look really good" he says with wide eyes, and gets up from the bed, approaching me.
"Please, you've seen me in way less clothes" I roll my eyes, and his hands grab my waist.
"Don't get me wrong, I love you naked, but there's something about these sweatpants that's so intriguing...and the bra..." he whispers and his hands snake up my body, his fingers run over the thin material of my lace bra, and I shiver.
"Not now" I whisper, barely audible.

He begins kissing my neck, sucking it aggressively, and I know all hope of talking is lost.
We end up in bed. Again. Like we're some kind of fucking animals.

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STEVE'S POV

I love Natasha. I do, but we've been having so much sex, and we've barely gotten anything done over the course of what? Four weeks. Everyday, multiple times a day.
And then we fight at night, one more round, and then we don't even share a bed.

I haven't held her close for weeks, maybe even months.
And I miss that. Her tiny figure cuddled close to me. And I feel so free when we're sleeping so close.

"Steve?" Natasha's pitchy breath sounds next to me, interrupting my thoughts.
I don't move closer to her, because I don't think she wants that.
"Yeah?" Is what I settle my answer to.
"You know we can't keep having sex all the time, right?" She asks.
I look at her. She's sweaty and beautiful, and I want to take her in my arms. I actually feel sick because I haven't held her close in so long.
"I know. So you're suggesting that we become more like a couple again, and a little less like animals?" I ask a little relieved, and I hesitantly tug a strand of hair behind her ear before I stroke her cheek.
"Yep, but we need to sort out whatever it is that makes anything other than fucking literally impossible for us first" she says and brush my hand away from her face.

We look at each other.
Her eyes, they look tired, she looks sad.
"What are we doing, Natasha? Are we even happy?" I ask her.
She looks a bit surprised by my question, but then she sighs, and closes her eyes for a second.
"I haven't been happy for four and a half years Steve. I don't know about you" she says, and turns away from me, looking to the ceiling.
"I guess...I haven't been really happy, but I'm happy with you, because I love you" I say, and I move a little closer to her.
"I love you too, but...we're not gonna ignore the fact that the only time we've spent together as a  'couple' the last couple of weeks was with hours of sex" she says.
"No, I guess you're right. What happened to us Nat?" I ask her.
"We lost. And I think we lost us in the battle as well. We kinda found out about that when we broke up last time, but I guess we denied it" she shrugs.
"Yes we denied it because we love each other" I say, pretending I didn't hear her say 'broke up last time'. We're not breaking up now.
"Are you sure we're not just holding onto something that used to be there?" She asks, finally looking at me again.
"It didn't used to be there, Nat. It's still here. I love you so much" I say, and I can feel my heart pounding faster, and I'm questioning everything. She did love me at some point at least. Didn't she?

She puts her hand on my cheek, and this gesture is more cuddly than anything we've done for months.
"Steve. I love you. More than anything, and I am still so grateful, that you love me too, because I never thought I'd have that.
But we've been trying to make this work for seven years. What if it just...doesn't work?" She asks, and my heart breaks a little bit.
"No, Nat don't give up. That's unlike you. We can make this work!" I say determined.
"How?" She asks.
"I don't know. But we can and we will" I say and kiss her.

She's mine. She's mine forever and she can't do anything about how much I love her.
She can end this with me. Do whatever she wants...okay not be with other people, because then I would have to kill them.
I love her, and I'm not letting her go this time, no matter how much she tries to end this, if she even does.

Our kiss is passionate and heated, but it's only kissing.
I suddenly remember how perfect her lips are.
Half our make-outs these past weeks have been angry, so I forgot how perfect they are. But now when it's passion and love, and not anger, it feels perfect.

Much against my will, I pull away from the kiss and look at her, running my fingers up and down her still naked back from our first round of...fun...about an hour ago.
"Natasha. We're not breaking up. You can't get rid of me now" I say, and shake my head.
She circles a finger around on my chin.
"I don't want to get rid of you. I just want you to be with me, but I'm not happy, and I just worry about you having to be with a depressed woman, desperately trying to bring back billions of creatures that are probably dead" she says with a laugh, that I can hear is hiding her pain.
"As long as it's you, you could be crazy and psycho, and I would still love you" I say and I kiss her again.

"Let's make a deal" she holds out her hand.
"Yeah?" I ask intrigued.
"We can take breaks from the relationship, but we can't ever break up. And then, when we've found a solution to bring everyone back. Because we will! Then we...erh..." she squints her eyes, looking like she's thinking.
"Then we get married" I finish her sentence.
Her eyes gets big and she looks frightened.
"Then we what!?" She exclaims in a high pitched voice.
"Get married. I'm marrying you, and if you don't agree then I will travel the universe to find more good reasons you should marry me, other than how crazy in love with you I am" I say excitedly, and I can already imagine our wedding.
She doesn't answer. She just rests on top of me, staring blankly into the pillow beneath me.

I put both hands on her back, and pull the sheet further up her naked body so she doesn't get cold.
"Natasha?" I ask worried. I hope I didn't go too far.
"I will" she nods, still staring at the pillow with the same blank look in her eyes.
"You will what?" I ask. I don't want to get my hopes up, so I need to make sure.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but okay. I will marry you" she looks at me, and I can't believe my own ears.
"Wait..? Hold on! Say that again! Say that again. You...you'll marry me?" I ask out of breath.
"When this is all over, then I will marry you" she smiles with a determined nod.
"No, did I hear wrong? I...you? I mean?" I stammer.
She moves closer to my face.
"I will marry you, Steve Rogers!" She shouts into my face.

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NATASHA'S POV

I can't believe I agreed to this.
Getting married?
But I couldn't find a better person to marry than Steve.

Still with my face close to his, he just looks at me.
Completely empty of words.

"You...you'll marry me! We're getting married! I can't...holy smokes! I can't believe it. I'm getting married to you!" He yells and then he kisses me. A deep kiss. Confirming everything we've had for almost seven years.
And I don't even need to think twice. I'm marrying him.

He pulls away from the kiss, holding my hair away from my face.
"You are Natasha Romanoff, right?" He asks excited.
I nod with a stupid smile on my face. And the stupid smile is all thanks to him.
For the first time in four years, I feel genuinely happy.
"I just needed to make sure that it's really you. I love you, Natasha" he says, his voice more serious now.
He strokes my lips with his thumb, and I get lost in his eyes.
"I love you too, Steve. So much" I say.

I kiss him, and he kisses me back.
This is how it's supposed to be.

I hope you all like this chapter! I think it's so cute, and I don't know why but it is to me.
Soon we're in the Endgame, and we'll see what'll come of their relationship.

Please vote and comment if you're in the mood, because it means a lot to me.
But most importantly, please just enjoy my story, be good to yourselves, and stay safe!