Parang Kailan Lang

PKL: Tatlumpu

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"I know, it was long time ago but I am telling this to you because I love my friend and I don't want her to get hurt and suffer again. Yes, Jecille had her own family issues. You protected her and there's nothing wrong with that. But Daisy have her own family issues too. Hindi mo alam dahil abala kang protektahan si Jecille. Nakita ng mismong mga mata ko iyon. She hid her problems at home with her sunny disposition in the school. She sported masks because she didn't want anyone to be responsible with her problems. Kusa siyang nagkuwento sa 'kin, crying and spilling her traumas before. If you happened to touched a scar in her head. That's when her original sunny personality deteriorated. Siya pa rin naman ang Daisy na kilala n'yo sa school. Sadyang matatag lang talaga ang pader na meron siya sa mga tao, di nga lang halata sa mga tao."

"I saw you observing her for a long time. Stealing glances. Mind you, attorney. Akala mo hindi ko napapansin ang pagnanakaw mo ng tingin? I didn't open it to the Daisy, even telling it to her because I was waiting for you to do something. Turns out, wala ka naman talagang ginawa kaya hindi ko maatim kung bakit biglang nag-iba ang ihip ng hangin. Ayoko nang ulitin pa ang sinabi ko kahapon. I know, we are all protecting Daisy in our own way. If it's for happiness, then I'll go with it."

Raspberry's words stuck in his mind. Hindi siya mapalagay pagkatapos ng nangyaring komosyon bagay na ikinagulat nilang lahat. Kinausap ni Noah ang kaibigan ni Daisy na mukhang hesitant pa siya kausapin noong una. She looked like a cold-hearted woman when she faced him but her face became soft the moment she opened up about Daisy. Neutral lang naman ang pakikitungo ni Berry sa kanya noon. Not cheery. Not familiar. Just civil. Madalas nagkakausap lang sila tungkol sa acads. Hindi na na siya nagulat na nakuha ni Daisy ang kiliti ng babaeng ito.

Aminado siyang may pagkukulang siya at nauunawan naman nito iyon dahil mga bata pa sila noon. May iba't iba rin silang priorities at higit sa lahat, hindi nila kontrolado ang sitwasyon, ang mga nangyayari.

"'Wag kang mag-alala, hindi ako mawawala sa 'yo. Not again. Sana'y patawarin mo na ang sarili mo sa mga ginawa mo noon. You're too wounded that I'm willing to absorb your sadness even though you're not saying anything. Ramdam ko sa mga mata mo. Yes, it's a gamble but I did it anyway, secretly. Minahal ko ang batang Noah. Minahal mo rin ang batang ako. That's enough for me. Hanggang ngayon nga, hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na magkasama na tayo. Not because ayaw ko, nasanay lang siguro ako na malayo sa 'yo."

"Hindi ako perpekto. I have my shares of shortcomings and mistakes. I learned from it the hard way. Kailangan pa akong makatikim ng suntok kay Lirio matapos kong magtapat sa 'yo sa Basilica at ilagak kung saan ni Shawn upang ayusin ko ang buhay ko. Muntik nang mapariwara ang buhay ko. Ikaw ang isa sa mga dahilan kung bakit natupad ko ang mga pangarap ko sa tulong na rin ng mga kaibigan ko." He hugged her. Ilang araw ba naman silang hindi nagkita. "I admire your bravery all through these years. Babawi talaga ako."

"Huwag mo naman pahirapan ang sarili mo nang dahil lang d'yan. Nandito ka na sa piling ko. Yes, our past have its bad sides but may good sides pa rin naman. Ang mahalaga ay ang ngayon. Mahal kita, okay? 'Wag ka nang mag-alala pa."

Noah was snapped out of his reverie when one of her colleague's secretaries entered his office and gave him some important documents. He sighed when his eyes landed on the calendar.

He didn't see her for one week because they were caught up with their jobs. Miss na miss na niya ito. Hindi sapat ang phone calls at texts. Gusto niya itong mayakap at mahagkan. He was so busy with his work that it lessened his sadness when Daisy was not around.

He was listing and connecting the information he received when a staff handed him a letter. Nagtaka tuloy siya kung kanino galing iyon.

"Basahin n'yo na lang po, Sir."

A letter?

Tila nawala lahat ng stress at mga alalahanin niya sa trabaho nang malaman kung ganino galing ang liham.

Dear Noah,

These days, I keep on thinking about how we met before. How our eyes collided, and how our story started. It felt nostalgic for me, knowing that we still end up after years of being separated and going on with our lives.

I knew how tough it was for you then to wait for me, to love me even if I kept on forgetting you. But I am not. Itinago lang kita sa isang bahagi ng puso ko. And when I opened up the Pandora's Box again, I felt overwhelmed that I cried and cried kasi mahirap palang pigilin 'yung damdamin ko para sa 'yo. I couldn't suppress it for long, so I took the risk this time, and I'm fully okay.

We were still mending on our broken hearts when you confessed to me. Naisip ko, kung naging tayo noon? Kung tinanggap ko ang pagmamahal mo? Masisira ba tayo lalo? Pareho ba tayong lulubog? I'm afraid that we'll end up cutting and bruising with our sharp edges. I didn't want to burden you that time so I left and prayed that you're going to be fine. I know how tough your life is and I'm proud that you became the man you deserve to be.

I am not a perfect girlfriend, yet I'm trying to be transparent with my feelings so that I won't make you worry. I am not good, and I'm still learning, and someday, I will cook you good food when you're tired from your work. No matter how hard and dangerous your profession is, I'll be strong for you and stay by your side. I'll be there for better or for worse. This time, haharapin natin ang pagsubok na darating sa ating relasyon. Hindi na ako matatakot dahil nandiyan ka naman sa tabi ko.

Hindi man tayo laging nagkikita, tandaan mo. I love you, always.

Lovingly yours,

Daisy

* * *

Noah went out of the Capitol after he talked with attorney Melendez. He was still heady after he read her letter and read it over and over again if he had his free time.

That afternoon, sapat lang ang init ng araw at panaka-naka lang ang mga ulap sa langit. Kanya-kanyang labas-masok ang mga empleyado at bisita sa Capitol building. He stood in front of the intersection, meters away from it. Not minding that he's standing at the center. He was admiring the busy street, the skies and the road leading to his highschool alma mater when a familiar voice called his name.

A warmth feeling shot through his heart and a smile spreads on his face when he saw her cute face, smiling at him. Nakakahawa talaga ang ligaya ng babaeng minahal niya at mamahalin pa. Tumakbo ito papalapit sa kanya, bakas ang pangungulila sa mga mata at alam niyang nasasalaminan niya iyon. Tumakbo rin siya pasalubong rito na parang ilang taon silang hindi nagkita.

At nang lundagin siya nito at saluin ito ng mga bisig niya ay hindi niya mapigilan ang mga luhang bigla na lang sumungaw sa gilid ng mga mata niya. There was something new in here that gave him more warmth. Magkayakap na silang dalawa at naisubsob ni Daisy ang kanyang mukha sa dibdib nito.

"You felt like home," he whispered, lightly kissing her head.

"You were too." She almost sob. "Miss na miss kita kaya di ko na napigilan ang sarili kong bisitahin kita rito. How did we endure the years we weren't together?"

He slightly chuckled. "Mahal lang talaga natin ang isa't isa."

Marami man silang mga chances st taong nasayang. Matatag pa rin ang pagmamahal nila sa isa't isa. Even though, they were miles away from each other. Even though, there's only a small possibility to meet again. At kung minsan, ang panahon na mismo ang magdidikta para magkita kayong muli ng minamahal mo.

Parang kailan lang noong nagsimula ang lahat sa inosenteng tinginan sa waiting shed at jeep. Ngayon, haharapin na nila buhay ang buhay na magkasama at nagmamahalan.

W A K A S